Guys, My boyfriend wanted a pause in the relationshipto work on himself because he has a lot going on emotionally?

[Anonymous]

So my boyfriend asked for a pause in the relationship, but he wants communication but no seeing eachother in person. He wants to work on himself and he can't give me the attention and love that I need right now. Which I understand ok, but he still video chats with me and msges me. He'll send me pictures of his dick and him jacking off saying how much he loves worshipping my body. And then yesterday he told me he loved me through snap chat, and when he video chatted he was being goofy but never said I love you to my face. Please help me understand. I'm so so confused

[In_Trance]

He wants to fuck other women and have you wait around until he's done

[BarryLiverstone]

How long did you date before he asked to break up?

[Asker]

Over a year

[Asker]

Even within that year he would tell me that he knew how he was treating me wasn't right, and he knew he couldn't give me the love and attention I deserved because of what was going on with him

[BarryLiverstone]

Sounds like he is having issues getting himself on track in life. Has he always had emotional struggles since you met him. Or did something tragic happen recently?

[Asker]

His ex wife left him out of the blue, they were only married for a few month's and had been together for 5 months total. Every one of his exs cheated on him. And before me, he had only ever been im long distance relationships. He did tell that he would jump right into another relationship, and never really gave himself a chance to heal. He told me he loved me on day 5 of dating and He asked me to marry him after 2 months of being together
He was home schooled His dad got put in prison because he shot up a town when my boyfriend was 12, his grandfather who was very stern and rough with him took the place of his dad. He just got back from Iraq and he grandfather died 2 weeks ago. He has told me numerous time that he feels bad that he can't gibe me the time and attention that I need because the emotions overwhelm him so much that he needed space to recharge and he did that by hanging out friends because he didn't feel anything when he is with friends he also plays video games to get lost so he doesn't feel

[BarryLiverstone]

There it is. Yes he has lots of challenges in his life but his grandfather died two weeks ago. His anchor and really his dad in practical terms just died. That’s why he’s asked for a break.

Does that help with your confusion?

[BarryLiverstone]

He doesn’t want to see you in person. Is that tough on you?

[Asker]

Yes and no, he wants a break so why continue to talk to me via snap, video chat me goodnight every night, be sexual with me, via snap, flirt via snap, and tell me his loves me via snap. I guess that the most confusing part

[Asker]

And yeah him not wanting to see me in person does bother me but talk to me and video me I just don't understand

[BarryLiverstone]

Go ahead and follow me. I’ll explain in more detail. In short it’s what he’s used to

[Asker]

Ok, yeah I definitely need more understanding. I don't want to leave this relationship I really do love him very much, I don't know what I can do though to help

[Asker]

And I followed you

[BarryLiverstone]

Thank you

[Asker]

He's also much younger then me as well

[BarryLiverstone]

How old? You can reply to my message

[BarryLiverstone]

You blocked me

[Asker]

He is 27 and I'm 38