Why do some men fake their whole personality and are with someone for years that they don't want?

Question

like they are talking to multiple women, using the woman, my main thing is why do some keep up this act for years even lying to a woman saying they love them etc

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Accepted Answer

Most likely because of a thousand different factors relating to his experience as a man. There is a social boost that men get from dating a girl who they deem worthy of that social boost, aka “dating out of your league”. It makes them seem like the “better” man in comparison to their male friends because they now have regular access to sex, a privilege they might not have. There’s also the fact that these men aren’t willing to do whatever work they need on themselves because they believe a woman will solve all their problems (ie a “Nice Guy” who thinks all he needs to get a girlfriend is just a chance to prove he’s good for her, not realizing the issues of entitlement in that statement and his inability to take accountability). You have plenty of issues with trauma dumping because these men are unable to let themselves be vulnerable with anyone else but a romantic interest and don’t realize just how damaging that is to handle psychologically because they’re just desperate to get rid of it. Experiencing rejection after that is probably not easy to deal with and encourages them to completely falsify who they are in the hopes of just having  someone  because these men struggle to even like themselves, let alone believe someone could love them.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Oohweee I know a guy who did this shit so bad and he had an actual woman for almost 12 years. He married her too. lied to them women like there was no tomorrow. They was out here trying to make his wife look bad. hunny he played those women like a violin and didn’t ask of the same shit from the wife either.

V_Injector · Accepted Answer

I chewed my friend out for this so many times. He'd put on this act with his girlfriend. Lie to her about smoking cigarettes or smoking weed. I'd be like "Dude, lying is for pussies. Just tell her you smoke and then shut her down when she tries to bitch about it." and he just wouldn't do it. It was like he was scared of her disapproval, even more than holding onto honesty.

My philosophy is disappointing a woman makes her pussy wet.

Why do some men fake their whole personality and are with someone for years that they don't want?

I mean disappointing a woman by being caught in a bullshit lie over some weak ass bullshit is like a real disappointment to a woman. You'll get more respect by responding to her bitching about your drinking by scratching your balls and throwing your empty beer can in her general direction, and then telling her to get you another beer. But hiding it, and then still getting caught... You're not just disappointing her, you're losing her respect.

I'd rather disappoint the shit out of her but keep her respect.

... and throw empty beer cans at her.

ProbablyClueless · Accepted Answer

Sometimes it's a power trip thing. Sometimes they do it because they have some deep emptiness inside of them that they need to fill with other people's validation.

People like that are weird, man. For whatever reason, they feel shitty and somehow that means that they get to do unbelievably personal and vindictive shitty things to other people. You hear about that kind of thing happening with women too, sometimes, where they'll just date or marry someone for years because one of their friends dared them to, or whatever.

Then, suddenly, after devoting decades of your life to someone you thought was your partner; the rug gets pulled and you find out that they only ever saw you as a convenience item.

coachTanthony · Answer

No responsibility…care free…. no real commitment …. its a win win for most guys

DannyUk2017 · Answer

Because of the "pussy power", until they get bored...🤷‍♂️

HawkPerception · Answer

It's not solely men that do this. Women are able to do the same thing. Some people have better intuition than others when it comes to reading people. The one girl that I could not figure out at all turned out to be a complete psycho that tried to ruin my life. Every other girl that I had a good intuition about was a genuinely good person.

es20490446e · Answer

They may not have the courage to express what is really important for them, and instead they choose to mold to their partner.

This may work for a while, but eventually it comes to the surface. As the people involved aren't being honest about what they truly want.

PointlessNonsenseGuy · Answer

Umm... so were you lied to in this way? Did a guy fake his whole personality with you for years?

You should probably give more details about your own story.

I've heard about guys having multiple wives, even multiple families, that don't know about each other, but I don't think this is something a lot of guys do.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Only the top 5% of men are able to act like this and probably only about half of them act like you describe. Why do they do this? Because they can. Women are throwing themselves at these men so why would these men settle down and commit to one woman.

hahahmm · Answer

Because some guys act like women & they learned it from women. Not that all women do it, but a lot of them are good at being undercover agents.

Anonymous · Answer

The same reason women do the exact same thing. Its insane really, perhaps you should ask your own gender that, cause that behavior is far more common among women than it is men.

Anonymous · Answer

They are likey using theses girls, and are not actually pursuing a long term partner.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

To be clear. Women do this too. Everyone does this, is it scummy? Yes. Is there an explanation? Not really, except (in short) people suck.  Goodnight

TracyF · Answer

Okay that's not a normal things guys do. You must know psychopaths. That's not normal human behavior

Anonymous · Answer

For the same reason so many women do the exact same thing.

Anonymous · Answer

They want the security and consistent sex of one woman and the variety of other women.

sawno · Answer

Easy access to sex is all I can think off.

jahaims · Answer

They are fake because they don't like themselves

Finchie40 · Answer

Because it’s cheaper to keep her is my guess

spartan55 · Answer

Is it possible that YOU were the problem?

WhitneySnow · Answer

I guess because they get sex out of it

war_daddy · Answer

they probably want sex

Anonymous · Answer

Cos they can't get another woman.

Anonymous · Answer

They are narcissistic aka cowardly people

Why do some men fake their whole personality and are with someone for years that they don't want?

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