Does this guy like me as friend or hidden feelings?

[Abbie81]

Me and a guy friend close friends for ages via work, we have done sexual stuff in the past about 4 years ago, both had partners. Don’t judge please.

Now I am single , he still with his girlfriend, I had rough year, my dog died, step dad got cancer, and now I have minor cancer scare.
But his girlfriend don’t like me as saw msgs years back when we flirted etc. he promised to never see me as friends, or speak as we work togeather.

But he set up a what’s app group under a different name so we can speak still, he takes me for breakfast to meet up, when I fell unwell, he messaged my step dad constantly, was gonna come to the hospital to see me that night, and pretend had work stuff to her.

He wants to really meet my family, but he at times randomly pushes me away and says I don’t like hugs, don’t come near me.

I am very confused and yet his support with my illness and still pursuing this friendship behind her back shocks me.
Please advise on this, is it general friendship from him, or hidden feelings?

He says him and his girlfriend good. we banter a lot too and he also says am I seeing other guys yet and laughs well says hehe

Updates

1 y

We work togeather still and teases me a lot at work

Updates

1 y

He brought me perfume a few weeks back, likes to please me too, but avoids situations like nights out with me etc. we meet up alone but more at breaks at work or go for lunch breakfast.

He wary girlfriend sees but just stares a lot

[ManOnFire]

Really not sure what to say. I'm sure it must be a blessing to have someone support you through your illness and everything, and that you don't have to go through that alone. But I do think everything is kinda messed up to be doing things behind his partner's back. He may very well have feelings for you, but you should just stay friends with him and respect his relationship, even if he doesn't.

[Abbie81]

Yes it has been very hard for me, but he really try’s to push to meet my step dad and mum too as my step dad into the same buisness as his.
Side buisness out of work.
It’s hard as I do like him and never tried it on out of respect.

But he loves to show me how well he is doing and says we will never be apart and goes hehe again.
He is bit younger.
Hehe he says my laugh but says it a lot when we flirt too much.

[Abbie81]

Sorry as yes surely that is no respect to his girlfriend, as he is like living another life. She has no idea.
It’s like emotional, he does love her as randomly gets angry at me sometimes saying, I love her a lot.
But goes I need you in my life, he shows no emotion

[ManOnFire]

Well, like I said. Keep it at just friends. If he loves his woman then he should stay with her. Don't entertain any ideas that you two can be together.

[Abbie81]

I don’t and respect he is with her, but I don’t get the what’s app group meet ups etc. why make the effort knowing if she found out , his relationship is done for

[ManOnFire]

Men with wandering ways think they'll get away with it.

[spartan55]

What are you wanting here? You are helping him knowingly cheat which just as much of a shit person as him.

[spartan55]

*which makes you

[Abbie81]

No I want to understand what he wants. We have not done anything just friends.
Not since years ago, but I guess my ask us “why keep up these meetings, messages, a lot of it is harmless, but some teasing etc.
I don’t get it

[spartan55]

Why does it matter what he wants? He is cheating with you... wtf.. ?

[spartan55]

He's just keeping you warm for when you will fuck him again.

[Abbie81]

Well no he isn’t we are friends and I never slept with him in the past just other stuff

[spartan55]

Well yes he is, and he's thinking 'other stuff' will turn to sex. So you don't mind being the one he cheats with? You aren't friends by the way.

[PeachyPie93]

All I can say is you shouldn't be so eager to take someones man. And you shouldn't even be considering his feelings. But I think he cares about you and wants to be friends but considering he doesn't want to hug you I think he likes his girlfriend more.

[Abbie81]

I am not eager I am confused as to what he wants, I have never tried it on, it’s always been him, but he does hug but randomly says he not a hug person at times

[PeachyPie93]

You are eager! If you weren't, you would not still be secretly texting him when you know he is not supposed to be texting you and entertaining him. You would pull away from him. Which you are not doing because you want to see what he wants and if he will chose you. Who cares what he thinks? He is still flirting with you, he is still buying you things, he is still helping you out when needed. He is still doing all this behind his girlfriends back. Would you still think he is a nice guy if you put yourself in his girlfriend shoes? He wants his cake and to eat it too. You are both cheaters and you should probably be together because you deserve each other but for some reason he won't let his girlfriend go. Maybe it is because he knows you cheated on your partner with him, so he can't keep you as his main chick because he knows you would probably cheat on him too. Cheaters like to cheat they don't like to get cheated on lol.

[Anonymous]

There is no way any of us can know that.

[Abbie81]

No but ok why would I guess a guy keep seeing me etc behind his girlfriend back.
They nearly broke up before