Why would a guy ask for time to fix a relationship?

[Anonymous]

I broke up with my ex a month ago. And now he's back after a few weeks, asking for time to fix the relationship, he won't tell me rn why the time and what he needs to do. he claims he will tell me everything and that he wants to fix stuff. He says he needs two weeks.

I went no contact, I left saying its fine that we moved in opposite directions and it happens because he started keeping secrets. But now he's back and wants to "fix things and tell me everything in 2 weeks".

What is your general opinion about this matter, is this legit or just a technique to have people around...

Updates

1 y

okay so just to clarify he actually wanted a month and I was like we broke up i don't care what you want, and he said two weeks and I was like don't hit up my line until ur ready within the two week frame and if you don't again ur choice but after that i never ever wanna hear from

[Oliverlogan263]

It's hard to say definitively without knowing the details of your relationship and breakup. A few possibilities for why he may want time:

- He's genuinely reflecting on what went wrong and wants to work on the issues that caused problems/led to secrets. Taking time shows he's taking it seriously.

- There may be sensitive personal things he needs to sort out on his own before fully opening up to you. Giving space for that is respecting his process.

- However, 2 weeks does seem like a long time without any clarity on what "fixing" entails. He could just be keeping you on hold until he sees if anything else works out.

- Or wants to delay being fully vulnerable/honest in case you say no to getting back together once he explains.

I'd say you can agree to chat again in 2 weeks to hear him out, but don't commit to anything yet. See what he says actually changed vs empty promises. Pay attention to how he handles communicating with you until then too. If he's wishy-washy or secretive still, that's a red flag. But relationships do require work sometimes, so an honest effort may be worth considering. Just protect your heart!

[SuchSightsToShowYou]

Okay, so apparently he wasn't keeping secrets, but then he STARTED keeping secrets.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say maybe something happened that made him feel the need to start keeping secrets. Maybe he ran into someone from out of his past. An ex-girlfriend, or a person he used to commit crimes with, or something. Something he decided to keep secret from you.

Maybe he wasn't even doing anything that bad. Maybe he was just trying to sever this connection with his past. Mind you, that's a VERY generous interpretation of what he might have been up to. But maybe.

You should probably listen to him in two weeks, because it would be nice to get an explanation, even if you don't take him back.

Good luck.

[jojouzumaki]

He probably fixing his own issues. The absence between you is beneficial. You decide what’s best for you.

[Radiate143]

Because he has a relationship to fix... with someone else. Sorry.

[Radiate143]

What has happened is that he's been juggling you and someone else. Something happened over there and he needs to do some damage control aka lovebombing. He needs to give full attention to that girl. So he has you on the backburner so he won't have you calling and bothering him while he's pretending like the other one is the one and only. Now, he could be seriously needing time but men rarely want to be away from women their into. Especially since he said two weeks. He knows exactly how long it takes to placate the other check hence the time frame.

[Radiate143]

Or he met a new girl and he has to feel her put and decide if he will juggle or monkeybramch over there.

[spartan55]

Why is he asking for anything? You broke up with him... am I missing something? Why are you entertaining his nonsense?

[WhitneySnow]

Might be legit but I’m troubled by the fact that he’s keeping secrets. Do you trust him?

[Nikki1989]

He sounds very shady. Do you trust him?

[Finchie40]

Why did you break it off with him in the first place?

[MicahRaine]

Unless his work requires temporary confidentiality, I'd make him tell you.

[noohair]

The only thing he can fix is himself. Somtimes that is not enough.

[Pterodon]

I wish my ex would’ve given me a chance to fix things

[Anonymous]

He wants time to play the field. Run.

[kaucky1]

Not sure of self