How can I stop falling for men who show me some attention?

[Anonymous]

I become easily attached.

[IslaTheWitch]

you already know the reason: you are looking for attention, positive attention... the fastest way is to find a psychotherapist and work through the reasons for your positive attention deficit in your past and solve them... the longer and harder way is to figure it out by yourself...

[Asker]

Thank you. I feel lonely so at this point I think I crave any attention and that’s kinda sad.

[IslaTheWitch]

I don't think you will be thrilled if he hits you...

[Asker]

He only dragged me one time because I didn’t want to leave after we had an argument.

[Nikki1989]

Are there any common traits or behaviors in the men you're attracted to?

[Asker]

Charismatic, kind, charming, flirty. All of this until I find out they have multiple women on the go.

[Nikki1989]

Well, that type can easily suck you in.

[LiamJHayden]

Stop yourself for a moment and ask, "Why is he doing so?" If it is genuine interest in you, then proceed as you want. If it is clearly just to get sex,...

[Asker]

After hurting me, he would always ask me if I loved him and if I despised him. Perhaps he is insecure, but that didn't stop him from doing the same things that initially made me feel upset. I agree, and I'm going to start thinking more before I rush into relationships just because they showed me a little attention. I shouldn't get so attached; I know I come across as desperate.

[EnjoytheDay777]

Been there, get to know them first. I know that's hard without getting attached first tho

[Asker]

It’s so hard.

[EnjoytheDay777]

Yes, it is. Hurts sometimes. If I get attached to someone I feel like I need their company a lot

[Asker]

Same. Don’t ever have other people trying to talk to you but alls you want is the person you’re into to talk so everyone else drains you? I hate being rude but when I am into someone sometimes I get bored with everyone else trying to get my attention and only desire who I am into.

[EnjoytheDay777]

So much the same for me. When I'm into someone talking or even chatting with someone else feels like work, like I really have no motivation to take it anywhere. Also I think it's cause I feel down without that person I like. Everything is so dull and colorless kinda

[Asker]

Thank you. The way you put it makes so much sense. It does make me feel guilty but I can’t help it.

[EnjoytheDay777]

It's totally human, nothing to be ashamed off. I think it means someone has deep feelings, which is actually a pretty awesome thing. I think the pain is the price we pay for having strong emotions

[Asker]

I agree. It can be great when someone else feel the same but when they don’t it’s a nightmare. I guess I just have to learn not to get so attached.

[EnjoytheDay777]

Same here. It sucks when anything someone does has so much power over my feelings.

[Asker]

Yea. 🥺

[ChicoFromThe305]

I don't know if there's a way to stop it, sounds like it's a part of you

[Anonymous]

It STARTS with self worth. You need to stop seeking approval from men. You're enough without a man (I assume, I don't know you😆).

[Ironco]

Get more selective

[NYlatefun]

What do you mean? As in falling in love?

[jahaims]

By becoming emotionally healthy