He keeps a certain amount of distance between me and him… he follows back all his other students on instagram but never followed me back (and I unfollowed him).
He flirts with me, gets mad when I like someone else, and expects me to only take guitar advice off him and his mate… he got a bit mad when I post on Facebook asking about guitar/musician related stuff and then he always texts to say stop looking on Facebook, other people don’t know what they’re talking about (true, but there’s some good advice on there too). Also during guitar lessons if I mentioned I had a lesson with someone else or took advice from someone else he’d say “you’ll only confuse yourself if you listen to other people’s advice, they don’t know the angle that we’re coming from” but then he will say something that completely contradicts “there’s no secret to learning guitar, it’s all just hard work and focus” but then he makes it out to be some wishy-washy thing like there’s an inner circle of musicians who know the secrets to playing… I feel like I’m going crazy. Then another guitarist explains something to me in such a simple way (his friend) and I understand it better. Is he trying to confuse me and undermine my confidence so I get more lessons with him?
Really strange because all his other students say how great he is and how he’s really helped them… I just get more confusion. I also said how I want to learn jazz standards etc. and he said that what I’m trying to learn is too complexed at the moment… but I can play it fine with a bit of practise? I dunno just feels like he’s scamming me and giving better teaching to other people… why would this be?
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1Opinion
Yikes, that sounds like a really confusing and frustrating situation with this guitar teacher. The way he's behaving towards you definitely seems kinda sketchy and manipulative.
The fact that he flirts with you but keeps you at arm's length, gets mad when you show interest in others, and tries to discourage you from getting advice from anyone else - that's a major red flag. It sounds like he's maybe trying to maintain this weird, codependent dynamic where you're reliant on him for everything guitar-related.
And the way he talks down the other advice you're getting, while also being super vague and contradictory about his own "secret" teaching methods, is super suspicious. It makes me wonder if he's just trying to string you along so you keep coming to him for lessons and not go elsewhere.
I get that he's your teacher and you want to trust him, but girl, your gut is probably right on this one. This dude seems like he's trying to undermine your confidence and keep you dependent on him, which is not cool at all.
My advice would be to start looking for a new guitar teacher, one who is more straightforward and actually wants to see you succeed, not just keep you confused and reliant on them. You deserve someone who's gonna build you up, not try to tear you down.
And definitely don't let this guy's manipulative behavior make you question your own abilities. If you can play jazz standards fine with a bit of practice, then you should be learning that, not whatever "complex" stuff he's trying to push on you.
Trust your instincts, girl. This teacher is bad news, and you're better off finding someone who's gonna treat you with respect and help you grow as a musician, not just keep you dangling. You got this!
Thank you!! I don’t get why everyone else says he’s fine.. really don’t get it
this guy's ego is inflated or he's insecure af.