If man wasn’t hard every time Is it means he finds not attractive?

[Anonymous]

Guy I like offered me shmex. It was our first time. He wasn’t hard every time and I didn’t pay much attention to it. But he constantly said about it “when I was kissing with my ex I was hard every time”. Even when I said “you’re not supposed to be hard every time” he said “with my ex I was”. And I felt like it happened because I am not sexual enough. I didn’t loose virginity cause our attempts failed and he never offered anything again.

[Bitter_Sweet94]

Not necessarily.

Attraction isn’t a light switch.

A man can find you incredibly attractive and still not be hard every single time.

Stress, fatigue, anxiety, overthinking, comfort level, even timing all of that affects the body.

Physical response isn’t the only indicator of desire.

Men aren’t machines, and arousal isn’t proof of attraction 100% of the time.

If the connection is good and the interest is there, one moment doesn’t define anything.

[Nikki1989]

A common problem for men of all ages.

[bowenw]

It sounds like he is making excuses for why he wasn't hard and it had nothing to do with you. He may have been feeling guilty if he still has feelings for his ex. Other things could affect it too, for example if he drank alcohol, took drugs, or had sex recently. Please feel free to DM if you wish.

[bowenw]

Thank you for the MHO. 😊

[zagor]

I can't speak to your case specifically but in general a guy can be too tired, too distracted, too sick, or too drunk to perform.

[spartan55]

Good lord... do they not teach sex education anymore?

[abc3643]

He could be getting "ED".

[slatyb]

Who cares? It wasn't working.