Guy's Behavior

My boyfriend is blaming me for my SA?

My boyfriend is completely blaming me for my sexual assault, and it’s clearly damaging our relationship. I was sexually assaulted about one to two weeks ago. When I first told him, he blamed me, then we supposedly “moved on,” and he started acting normal again.

Today, he blamed me once more and said, “You shouldn’t have gotten into a car with a stranger, and you should have left when you had the chance.” I immediately started crying and felt a deep, heavy feeling in my stomach that I’ve never experienced before. I stayed silent, and then he said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m just angry. It’s not your fault. I’m not seeing it from your perspective. You’re physically small, and maybe you did what you felt was safest.”

I already feel depressed and overwhelmed, and I feel like he’s pressuring me and reopening my trauma. I don’t know if this relationship can be saved. I’m torn between trying to work through it or ending things. I know this is hard for him too and that he’s grieving in his own way, but I feel too fragile to handle this right now.

Also for context, I was at my friend’s house and her relative offered me a ride because of snowy weather conditions, and it was late night. I don’t know this guy and I never met him in my life. From my bf’s pov by accepting this ride and not escaping the car I have caused to my own SA. He also keeps on asking me things like “did you hit him? did you punch him? did you push him?” He doesn’t understand that i’ve never in my life hit anyone and I am very soft and gentle when in danger like with this guy I fawn. My response is NOT fight or flight my body chooses fawning and that’s how I feel safe.
My boyfriend is blaming me for my SA?
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