Why do men have sex with me then ghost me?

[Anonymous]

This has happened for the third time
The first time was someone I worked with he was obsessed with me we had sex for around two weeks then he just went weird. The time we had sex first he lasted 3 seconds then the next time was about 5 mins and much better.

Then I had a date from someone who messaged me who is never met on social media and we had sex. He lasted about 3 seconds and I accidentally laughed at him. He did try to come over again but I was alseep by the time he got to my house. Then he tried again but I was fed up with him taking ages to reply.

Then the third was someone messaging me again and he lasted a lot longer about 5 mins first time maybe less. Then we had sex multiple times that night but again he’s ghosted me

Why does this keep happening? They all say I’m super pretty and the sex is amazing but then it ends like this. I do have 3 kids and don’t want a relationship and have said I’m not closed to it but not seeking it.

Am I that bad looking and the sex that bad?

Sex isn’t good and they don’t find me attractive

They did enjoy the sex it’s something else

[HollyK21]

You have nothing else to offer so what’s the use in sticking around? I’m not even saying that disrespectfully it just is what it is, you said yourself you don’t want a relationship so why would a guy put his time and energy into maintaining a connection that isn’t going anywhere? On top of that you’ve got 3 kids In your 20s, meaning they are all most likely underage not independent and out of the house. You’re more likely to meet a man who doesn’t even wanna run the risk of filling a father role than one who is.

[HollyK21]

Thinking they should want to maintain having regular casual sex is still you wanting a commitment, just the kind that you think will keep them around most since it’s less of a priority than a regular romantic relationship. Even so, it’s still a commitment and men can get sex from anywhere.

[jazzy34]

“I do have 3 kids and don’t want a relationship and have said I’m not closed to it but not seeking it.”


There’s your answer, honey. Also, you make it easy for them to sleep with you with no strings attached. Don’t you know men will say anything to get in your pants? Men aren’t stupid. They know how to get what they want and peace out.

[jazzy34]

Also, many men try to steer clear of women with children. They don’t want to deal with any drama.

[RavVid]

They are OK for sex though.

[RavVid]

It is hard for a man not to enjoy sex so unlikely it is that.

They might have had as much sex as what they want with you. That is almost certain or they could have felt they were getting attached and it was appropriate to terminate before they did.

[RavVid]

Thanks for mho

[Alex-Snow]

I'm sure they found you attractive and sexy if they orgasmed that fast. Maybe you need to not jump into sex right a way and get to know each other a bit more. If a guy shoots off too soon, have him go for round 2 or 3? Or give him a handjob first?

[Asker]

Wouldn’t they finish that quickly for anyone? Even if they didn’t find them attractive especially if sex had been a while ago for them

[Alex-Snow]

Probably. If a guy has not had sex or jerked off for a few days he may cum quickly. Give them a handjob first to get them to chill. It should slow them down a bit

[Anonymous]

Men don’t take anyone serious who are easy. Regardless of who you are. Unless it’s someone who s in love with you but that would take time and you open your legs too sometimes n before that can happen so they pass you up and search the next until they find a meaningful wife material.

[PeachyPie93]

You are too easy and not looking for a relationship.. Why would they chose you?

[Nikki1989]

Most men want to use women in one way or another. You are obviously not supplying what they want out of you.

[DryGermanGuy]

They are afraid of fathering your fourth child.

[TonyMetal___86]

Because you're making yourself cheap and available for men who are searching only for sex!
They use you and when they finish they dump you!

[BarryLiverstone]

Did they say you are pretty after the sex or before?

[Asker]

Both many times

[BarryLiverstone]

Think it would be hard to do if they ghosted you after they had sex

[BarryLiverstone]

How many dates did you go on with the guys?

[BarryLiverstone]

The ladies who answered are probably right. If the guys didn’t see value in you beyond physical sex then they likely went to someone else to get other needs met. If you have more secure boundaries and communicated your needs they can make choices prior to becoming intimate. Yes 3 kids seems like a lot, but every circumstance is different

[Asker]

So I suppose they didn’t “ghost” they still message back etc. one said you’re very pretty I’d like lying if I said other wise. The other kept begging for nudes. Then the other said he wanted to have sex again but none follow through a plan

[BarryLiverstone]

Right that makes more sense. You liked the effort and energy they gave you before you had sex and wanted that desire to continue after. But did you change in how you thought of them and communicated after?

[Asker]

If I didn’t it wasn’t intentional I was just as keen as before whereas they dropped all keenness and were just message here and there and no effort but still saying yeah let’s have sex etc if that makes sense

[BarryLiverstone]

Not really. It doesn’t make sense if they kept communicating and you said they ghosted you. Go ahead and follow me on here and I’ll try to help. It sounds like at different times you want a guy to communicate and act in non consistent ways

[Asker]

One of the men sent me photos of himself all the time and nudes then just stopped after we had sex and was much more reluctant to reply but still trying for sex
The other said he’s so busy and I am which is untrue and he didn’t like doing late night for sex he said he could just pleasure himself and not be tired for getting up at 5 am for work.
The other is slower to reply but always was he was never a quick replier but it does feel he’s trying to ghost

It’s like they all became much less interested in sex after having it but were so keen before

[Asker]

In my head they ghosted?

[Asker]

To me ghosting is acting totally differently like they were all so keen and full on then to after sex happened a few times were less and less and didn’t want to talk etc
The first guy we lasted about 2 weeks doing that then he was so busy and had to be up at 5.

Then second just went dead but kept up asking for sex

And the third was only the other day but I can feel the messages going from him being keen to not even tho last night he said he wanted to do it again but it’s 3pm here and he’s not replied

[BarryLiverstone]

Ya that’s love bombing. And if they are asking for sex, what are you asking for?

[BarryLiverstone]

Also another reason the guys may have been putting in less effort is sex can be risky. You could get pregnant. And you are good at sex?

[Asker]

I dunno they all said so? They all didn’t last very long at all. But the first guy said it was incredible
The second said ofc I enjoyed it didn’t uoy see how fast I finished
And the third said it was so good after and wants it again last night? Who knows if I am lol how would I know

[BarryLiverstone]

You would know if guys are consistent in having sex with you and trying new things and planning to see you and be around you.

[BarryLiverstone]

If they are less into you and not replying as much, it’s likely the hard focused on other things

[BarryLiverstone]

Are you asking if you are attractive? Or why guys act differently after sex?

[Asker]

Well they still keep asking for sex but don’t reply nearly as much
I suppose they did try new things with me? We did pretty much all things during sex
What do you mean hard focus on other things?
So there lack of interest now is probably me being bad at sex?

[BarryLiverstone]

You are asking more than your original question. Go ahead and follow me on here as it’s getting expanded what you need

[Asker]

I’ve requested you

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Because you give sex and access to your body too easy.

Stop doing that and you won't attract men who just desires you for sex.

[In_Trance]

Because you don't show them anything else you have to offer

[Asker]

Why not want regular sex though?

[In_Trance]

That's not enough

[MasterKS]

Forget it and get a better dick.