Have you ever countered an "act of service" with an "act of disservice" to camouflage your feelings for a person?

[DishLady]

Perhaps it's just something that happens in city environments, but I've found that bc I do a lot of community service I don't pick up on a guy doing an act of service for me... My mind glosses right over them, I think, bc we're ALL doing acts of service and I just see it as a sweet gesture, mentally log that this person is open for community service tasks so I ask him again in the future... and then that's that.

But lately a few times I've encountered "Acts of Disservice" from guys I once thought of as sweet and kind. I confess the fault is perhaps mind for not telling the difference between the act of interest and the simple community service interest.

In the case of either one, I'm always very grateful, I always give a shout-out or applause to the person for pitching in... gratitude galore in a healthy PG, "Thank you for your service" sort of way. What's there to be mad about? Perhaps the guy should simply SAY SOMETHING if there's more on his mind than giving back to the community, no?

[exitseven]

I really do not give it much thought. I work for a state college and there are people that work there that really go above and beyond what they are being paid to do. It pisses me off when the college screws them.

I knew a guy thata volunteered for a lot of different things. he wasa student advisor, and the Advisor to the Phi Beta Kappa society. If something needed to be done he would usually volunteer. The VP kept holding a permanent professor position in front of him. He was there for years and finally got sick of the runaround. He accepted a full time job at a different college. The VP finally made him a full time professor because he did not want to lose him.

[Ironco]

All the volunteer work I do, I'm too busy to notice such things too. Someone usually tells me after the fact. Then it's too late. 🤷‍♂️ I get too focused on my tasks

[DishLady]

Right?

Someone literally told me I should give this one guy a chance... that he's crazy about me but shy. You know? I didn't believe her at all bc the guy is SO out there and chatty with everyone then clams up with me and just does the one or two things I ask him to do for a project... And now not even that. My friend says it's bc I didn't take time to notice what was apparently right under my nose.

[Ironco]

I'm the same way. I get too focused and the ship sails away...

[DishLady]

Sigh.

[OlderAndWiser]

No, I am very open about whatever feelings I have for someone. Nobody plays a guessing game if they are dating me.

[worldscolide]

No, but I don't play games like that.

[spartan55]

Say something about what?