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Here is how the conversation went:
Him: Hey (my name) it's Cam from work.
Me: oh hi!
Him: so what you doing now that work is over?
Me: Just about to grab some canes.
Him: and didn't get me any?
Me: did you want some?
Him: My place is a mess right now or else I'd say yes.
Me: Coolio
Him: This is where you invite me over to yours.. just joking lmao.
Me: Hm. Maybe.
I've been left on delivered sense, and I did talk to him at work today cause I told him I would get him a coffee the next time we worked together. He came in late and asked where his coffee was and I said I didn't think you were coming today so I gave it to Josh. Then he seemed visibly upset.
The last messages where sent by me, and he definitely has read them, just kept them on delivered. I don't wanna play into his playboy mind games, but I genuinely wanted to try and get to know him better, so my MAIN question is,
"should I send him an invite for a hangout OUT somewhere as a sorry for the coffee incident?" Or should I just wait for him to text me because he has left me on delivered for this long
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
3Opinion
Send him an invite. Can’t hurt. But be careful. He does seem like kind of a player.
Yeah I could kinda tell too, and there isn't solid proof that he has a girlfriend but a lot of out coworkers mentioned that he might have one.
Oof. Maybe hold off on the invite until you know where he stands with the girlfriend thing.
Should I just be transparent and ask them like "hey are you under the impression that I like you? I did find you attractive at first but I heard you had a girlfriend so If me liking you is making you uncomfortable I apologize." ?
Be more like this! Strength in your fists!
https://www.youtube.com/embed/aOfhlYIRCXMThere's some nuance there, mind you. But that's a good starting point for shy people. Just say, "Hey, I want you." What's the problem?
I'm just a bit nervous he might be 1 only looking for a hookup or 2 has a girlfriend but pretending like he doesn't, or 3 I heard if a guy doesn't initiate first or often they are interested in you
He might be worried the same thing about you. So don't sleep with each other so quickly. Insist on it being nice and warm and affectionate for a while.
So should I text him something like this?
"Hey I wanna be transparent with you. One I know I already apologized about the coffee thing but I do want to make it up to you." And then tell him my feelings?
I know the worst thing I could get is a no and a rejection, but I kinda wanna keep a friendship with this guy dispite how little we have interacted.
How about remove the overhead? You can just say you wanna hang out with him. And you can say you'd enjoy that and think it's fun. What's the apology for? You didn't do anything wrong. I mean I don't want to guide you down the path that is incompatible with a weird guy. But if I'm the guy, and you're apologizing, I think, "What for?" Even if I'm jealous or some shit. You don't have to be a " feeling manager". Just say what you want. You wouldn't be asking us this shit if your way and intuition is successful, right? You are too concerned with the past maybe and how others feel before you have data, and based on things you didn't do. So tell people what you wanna do. "I'd enjoy doing X with you." Just like that. I can't guarantee that it'll work but I can guarantee that it said closer to what you meant.
Don't be afraid to muscle and assert your way in this world. That will help you not only for dating but being a project lead and so forth. I trust you understand the nuance of when this becomes unethical, since I suspect you're skewed the opposite way always being so careful about what other people think and feel. So you can't do so wrong interpreting what I suggest to "muscle" your way into this world, I suspect, for a good while. And you have the EQ when you know you've gone too far.
No, you should not. If he was interested, he would have replied.
Let him pay his own way