A question for the girls: do you really not feel safe?

Question

Do you really not feel safe? Like do you not run or walk outside at night? Even if you lived in a safe neighborhood?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

One year, I was on a weight loss journey. I live in a major city that has raging hot temperatures during the day, and because there is far too much traffic in the downtown area in the evenings, my only option was to workout at the crack of dawn. I purposely drove a half hour each morning to get to the trails in the richest part of town in the hopes of having some semblance of safety. I have a trail 10 minutes from my house, but no, I'll repeat, I drove 30 minutes just to utilize this trail with a police station on route, million dollar homes, superb trail lighting and water stations, and emergency telephones on route (though, do those things ever really work).

I ran four days a week at 5:30am every morning on this trail, eventually learning the usual crowd on the trail which helped me feel safer, but I never truly ever relaxed. My head was always on a swivel and before I would leave the house/or for the run, I would send out my "in case I get murdered text" of where I was going on my route, where I had parked, what I was wearing, what time I was to be expected back in addition to carrying my running pack which included my phone, mace, and a tracking beacon in case the phone wasn't enough.

Here is the thing...let's say, god forbid, the worst had happened and someone got me and the story was on the news...I can 100% guarantee you that women and men listening to the story of a lone woman running at 5:30am in the dark would blame me for being so reckless and stupid for running alone in the pitch black where bad people exist. We are always called dumb and reckless for going out alone for any reason and blamed for everything that happens after, but same story, a man gets murdered out there, and it's ohh, it's just bad people doing bad things.

Rei13 · Accepted Answer

I don’t live my life in fear but I am always aware of my surroundings. I am very petite so if a man (or larger women) did attack me they will probably over power me. I have walked at night in the city and I got followed, luckily there was a busier area nearby and I just went there. I have also had men target me in bars regardless of how I dressed when they didn’t think I had friends with me. That is excluding flirting, me turning them down, and then getting left alone lol. There was a guy who tried to separate me from my group who was being really touchy feely even tho I kept pushing him off but my friend (also male) broke that up real fast. And a lot of other experiences as a child up. My boyfriend hasn’t had the same experiences as me and he used to walk alone in the city all the time (one time did make him weary) and he used to go bar hopping by himself as well where he never had a problem. So while I don’t think you should live in fear, women definitely have to be more aware

provokeesmokee · Answer

It depends where I am, and what's been going on.

I live somewhere relatively safe, and populated by many young families and seniors. Not a high crime sort of area, with a lot of walking areas within shouting and sight distance of homes. So I don't mind walking alone or at night here.

I did live in the central core of my city for several years, and while I wouldn't walk alone at night, I would walk alone in early morning.

Regardless, I keep one ear free and stay aware if I'm going out. Even with others. The times I've thrwarted an attack or been approached (idiotically openly) by a dealer I've been with other people, including with a man.

I don't trust my safety to others when I go out and about. Being attacked is simply a risk, so I do what I need to manage that.

BlackBeauty90 · Answer

Months ago I was watching an animal attack video & one of the stories was about a woman in Alaska going for an early morning run. Like early morning. Not only was she alone but she was running with ear phones in, listening to music.

She was acting as if running in high end low crime suburb with the sun high in the sky. Unsurprisingly she got attacked and eaten by the Alaskan wildlife.

My point?

FAAARRR too many women go about life without considering the potential risk. Going to dark parking lots, leaving bars sloshed out of their minds, etc., etc., etc.

If a guy got attacked in similar circumstances - like going for a run wayyyy tooo early in the morning - he'd be called a moron, an idiot, etc., etc.. The difference is, is statistically men are bigger and stronger than women so they don't have to be worried as much.

I'm not saying women should be frightened nellies but they should use their brain a little more.

Alli39 · Answer

Sometimes. I probably don't have the awareness and sense of self-preservation that I should though. But like if it's dark and I'm alone outside, the phone is coming out just in case. I also live in a relatively safe area though. If I lived in an unsafe area I would probably never go outside alone at night. Day time is usually chill unless I'm somewhere overtly sketchy (which obviously I avoid).

So the short answer is yes, women to feel unsafe in some public spaces. We're considered easy targets.

nastyb · Answer

it really depends on where you are. If you are in NYC, no it is not safe. If you are elsewhere, it may be safer.

I was very bold and rebellious as a teenager and into my early 20s where I would ignore the warnings of my parents and hung out with guys privately where then I was a victim of sexual assault on multiple occasions. I've seen sexual predators / perverts use all sorts of tactics to try to take advantage of me through the years.

Any time a girl is in a private area with a guy... there will always danger. Often times sexual assault / rape doesn't always come in form of physical violence. Never ever go into a private place alone with a guy unless you know him thoroughly inside out for a many years. These are one of the biggest advice for my future daughters. Rules exist for a reason.

Justmisscurious · Answer

The answer will depend on a persons experiences or how they interpret certain information. I haven’t had any bad experiences with walking at night so I generally don’t mind if I have to do so. But I am aware of the crime that could happen as well as the level of safety in my neighborhood, so that is what makes me fall in the middle of feeling safe or not. I’m impartial.

GOLDFISH_smile · Answer

Yes really I don't feel safe. Given I've never lived in a super "safe" area, & there were plenty of times I didn't feel safe when living as a man either. But just the fucking amount of encounters in general has increased so much since people see me as a woman, that the bad ones have increased as well—& happen even in broad daylight in crowded areas now. Like nobody used to try shit with me on a morning bus. Now I have to be careful how I sit even there.

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Answer

I’m extremely aware of my surroundings every time I go outside alone. I always carry my phone in case I need to call the emergency line and while I feel safer walking during the day to where I can walk within a mile of my home, I stick strictly to the cul-de-sac where I live if I walk at night and don’t leave it, making sure to carry my keys to use as a weapon if I have to

Enaya · Answer

I live in urban USA and no, I do not feel safe. I always navigate with a plan of self-defense because I am catcalled and followed. I wear headphones on silent whenever I am out to pretend not to hear while being very alert. I ask my friends to check in when they are home. This is the story of every woman. Women are afraid men will rape and or kill them and the stats back it up.

Agape93 · Answer

Why would I always go out armed if I felt completely safe? Even in good areas you can still get hurt, robbed, killed or worse. Even in daylight.  Get strapped or get clapped.

Anonymous · Answer

I feel safe walking around my neighbourhood purely because it’s full of rich people who complain on the neighbourhood group chat about the smallest inconvenience in the neighbourhood lmao but anywhere else I feel on edge. There has been a lot of issues with women being assaulted in my city so I try my best to stay away from those areas, but if I really have to go there then I always make sure it’s with other people I know.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I don't feel safe going out by myself late at night depending on where I am in my town. There have been random assaults that have happened in certain parts of town so I try to be smart about where I'm going and when.

Anonymous · Answer

Well when I would walk home from the bus stop after getting out of school I would always look behind me every so often to make sure someone wasn't following me and my mom got a whistle to put on my lanyard and in case something bad happened I know how to defend myself because I took a self-defense class about a year ago and I taught myself to high kick

TheLadyBug · Answer

more i feel not safe when i see some weird lookin and loud guys and doesn't matter if day or night, than a just night itself. And yes sometimes walking at night is more safe because there no people, like 3am.

Dinklex3 · Answer

I definitely avoid walking outside alone at night when I can. Haven’t had great experiences no matter where I am. Even in “ safe” neighborhoods or countries.

Apple1996 · Answer

Nope I never feel safe especially when walking outside. I always carry my weapons on me just incase. Recently had a guy that kept showing up where I workout at. Had to change up the time and places so I wouldn't be followed anymore.

msmissydc · Answer

Alone at night by food yes to an extend. The thing is, if I can't even get rid of guys in a bar who just dont understand "no", I definitely dont want to meet these people outside on my way home.

Clarisse623 · Answer

Yes. Every time I’m alone or outside during the night my heart is beating fast, I have my hand on my Swiss knife and walk fast. But I also watch a lot of true crime so it may be have an impact. Even if stranger old man always tries to talk to you in a vulgarly way or just horns…yeah I feel pretty unsafe in some parts of the world.

Hush97 · Answer

I’m 4’11. I’ve heard about guys actually physically picking up women and carrying them off. My windows are tinted and I park close as I can if I go somewhere at night. I live in a pretty safe area but it never know…

mandyfire98 · Answer

I'm definitely not walking around in the dark alone.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

I feel safe most of the time but I don’t take risks. I don’t leave the house at night unless I have a ride home.

lilBigPotato · Answer

It depends very much on the location. There are some places where I don't feel safe. Might be sometimes irrational but when you hear many stories or know people who had bad experiences you get careful

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

I consider the neighborhood I live in quite safe.  I have walked or jogged out on the streets without feeling too concerned.

Samantha36 · Answer

Yes I feel very safe. I live in a small town in UK and its very safe. Don't think there's been a reported attack on a woman in 30 years

DizzyDesii · Answer

I feel safe as long as no one is walking all up on me, especially in big groups

Anonymous · Answer

Yes I do not feel safe if im alone and im outside by myself. But that happens maybe once Every two months because I really need to run down to the grocery store and get something but other than that never.. I dont party so it rarely happens.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I feel safe where I live now. I  never  felt safe living in the USA.

Smashingdoozy · Answer

Yes. I've been stalked, harassed, and sexually assaulted. I don't go out alone especially at night.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, I feel safe because I have an ugly face so no man will want to rape me, kidnap me or assault me in any kind of way. Men will be running away from me in disgust, not the opposite. 🤣

I've literally never been looked at twice, followed, cat called or any of that stuff. But my sister who is younger than me exepriences being followed, cat called, men staring at her because she's beautiful.

sheenagwapa · Answer

i don't feel safe at night but if i'm angry i go put even if inside me i'm worried. but even if i'm stubborn i would still take care of myself

Yannishka · Answer

I feel safe. You can find me out by myself at 2. But only in places I know.

A question for the girls: do you really not feel safe?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls Said

Girls, what does feeling safe mean?

A question for the girls: do you really not feel safe?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls Said

Girls, what does feeling safe mean?

We're glad to see you liked this post.