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If so why? Appreciate responses from girls more because I just wanna know what's left for us to marry you in this world men are constantly getting used making more and more mental and financial distress on us. Especially at divorce cases. Apparently some women just marry to get divorced so they can inherit something that they never earned. I'm honestly perplexed about this whole situation.
No.
Here's the thing. Why did men marry in the past? It's in the traditional vows.
""I, ___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded husband/wife/spouse, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith [or] pledge myself to you.""
A wife is suppose to be a place of solace, peace. I'm sure you are well aware of the statistics on cheating and divorce, and the general degradation of women over the years. When you get married you are suppose to be able to trust your wife fully that she wouldn't cheat on you, that she would actually stay true to her vows. That's not the world we live in. It's such a simple and basic thing, minimum requirement and hardly any of them are capable of even that, staying faithful. LOST SOULS! You have to deal with all the other stresses of the world including supporting her, and most of them can't even fulfill the basics of love. While you feed her well, stay faithful, put a roof over her head, and treat her like a queen... Fabricating outlandish excuses on why they don't see it as "cheating". I'll just go ahead and say it some of them actually are that dumb both spiritually and intellectually inept and don't know these basic things. Fidelity, love. commitment. You can even see it on this site! how many questions has there been where women want to and ask anons if they should cheat on their husbands, boyfriends? While most of them haven't even tried masturbation or sex toys they jump right to cheating, ripping your heart out. Lost souls.
The power of a woman IS manipulation, since they don't have physical strength. Most of the bad apples will be indistinguishable from the good apples if they exist, until it's too late.
I know you wanted to hear from women, but oh well. here's a post from a guy.
I guess the TLDR on that would be. As men we already have to deal with so much stress and a world that doesn't give a fuck about us.
Just by statistics, the numbers game, a wife would add even more stress & pain into that equation.
Prenup and communication are the key to today’s marriages, and be honest, caring, humane and fare in that.
Don’t leave anything for future discussions. Work as a team and set boundaries and rules. Live together before marriage and divide responsibilities combining equality and justice.
Leave your genitals and gender roles aside and use your heart and brain and you shall be fine.
At the end both parties shouldn’t marry for the status, or for the fear of loneliness, and shouldn’t marry cause they think that person is the “best available” option, but rather the best of all. A person to live a compassionate love with!
ROFL.
Of course it's worth getting married. Otherwise what value is a son if you can't carry on the family name & legacy? Do you honestly think any self-respecting father in his 50s-70s is going to say I am proud of my son when he can't do something so simple?
Now instead of blaming women maybe men should increase their standards. Hmm?
Instead of getting involved with overly attractive but simple minded women or getting involved with women dressed & acting cheaply that'll screw anyone who says hello to them... instead getting involved with basically the least marriage material women - the LEAST desirable women as a wife and mother - on the block & whining "oh poor me".
LOOK for actually decent respectable women. Women that dress respectfully. ACT respectfully.
They exist.
But to be honest a lot of decent respectable women in western countries like the US are looking at European men & even men of different ethnic groups - such as Christian Egyptians - because to be extremely blunt western men predominantly in the US are becoming increasingly less and less desirable.
Instead of being men - and being responsible for YOUR poor choices in a partner - you blame everyone else. About as mature as a 5 year old.
@Rangers ROFL. They're not. Every single female in my family has been married for not 2-3 years but for some time. My cousin 10 years, her ma & pa for 60 years. Stop troveling the bars & the clubs. Stop getting hitched with women who grew up in families with no standards.
Honestly you western "men" really excel at whining instead of being men and striving for success.
@Rangers Obviously you have no ambition.
I’m happy I saw this. My friend is dating a Christian Orthodox Egyptian doctor. I posted a question about this, would love your insight on it if you have a chance.
@Rangers What does being RICH have to do with anything? Grow a spine & some balls you whining coward and DO something with yourself. You are a prime example of why decent respectable women in America would rather date ANYONE from outside the country than be saddled with an American man.
If you lived my life, you'd off yourself within 2 minutes of being in my skin.
And if girls are leaving the country, good riddance, less entitled brats being funded by my tax dollars.
I have a girlfriend who's the only good girl in the universe, so you don't interest me anyways. If men stopped paying taxes, you'd die of dehydration in 3 days, remember that when putting men down.
You're biting the hand that feeds you while you sit and soak up their money, I wouldn't do that if I was you
And as far as being rich, massive amounts of wealth is the only way to have what can be considered a "life". Anything else is constant suffering and helplessness
I was not blessed as such, so I won't ever get to have that life, perhaps I will in the afterlife which will last much longer than this one
@Rangers WHO is putting you down? WHO is putting men down? I said STOP WHINING. That's it. Because that is EXACTLY what you are doing.
DO YOU COMPREHEND WHAT IS BEING SAID TO YOU?
And WHERE did I even give the SMALLEST indication I want to be your girlfriend. I have an intelligent boyfriend who COMPREHENDS what is being said to him.
The answer is right in the question you asked, and it’s not gender specific.
“What’s in it for me?” “What do I get out of this deal?” If these are the first questions that come to mind when you think about marrying your current partner, don’t get married.
If you look at this person and think “I just want to see you happy, and I will work to see that happen,” marry that person. After many years of togetherness, I still look at my husband and want nothing more than to make his day better. He does so much for us and our family, he deserves nothing less. And he’ll say exactly the same thing about me.
I mean that sounds great but practically its not anything functional to go on. It's as tone deaf as a lotto winner saying "why you all so broke? Just buy a ticket and win, easy peasy. If you go in with an attitude you will lose you won't win. I believed I would win and my first ticket won. Simple."
Its not YOUR attitude that makes a marriage lasts its the other person's attitude. How you believe a marriage should be is irrelevant to how it will work out for you. It's what the other person believes.
@bamesjond0069
So you’re saying that marriage should be the opposite? That it should be all about how you will personally benefit from it?
If that’s what works for you, then use that approach. But does it really work?
Where did you ever get the idea that it was “easy peasy?” Because it’s not easy for most, those who did make it must have had it “easy peasy?” Sometimes….. people just honour their commitments.
You are absolutely correct, it depends on the people involved. Two unique individuals coming together to build a life takes a lot of work. And compromise. But trust me, you won’t be fighting over lifted toilet seats and whose turn it is to do the dishes if you are driven by the desire to make the other person happy. Genuinely happy by the way. And I’m not talking about the “ohhh! Look at the diamond he just bought me” kind of happy either.
@OrallyFixated "Sometimes….. people just honour their commitments."
Sounds like a lotto.
"... if you are driven by the desire to make the other person happy. Genuinely happy by the way."
Irrelevant. I could be that way 100% and it will make no difference in the outcome. It will rely on the other person.
"That it should be all about how you will personally benefit from it?"
I come from a marketing background. I have seen time and time people generally do what they think benefits them most. If the most benefit comes from being in the marriage they stay. If the most benefit comes from leaving they leave. 99% of human behavior can be accurately predicted this way. So yes I think there must be value for both people or you're just asking for trouble.
@bamesjond0069
If what benefit you get from marrying someone else is your main concern, then you set yourself, and your partner, up to fail.
“Irrelevant. I could be that way 100% and it will make no difference in the outcome. It will rely on the other person.” You make it sound like you are powerless in your relationships. Is that the problem?
I don’t have a marketing background, but I spent more than 30 years working on a successful relationship. Surly that grants me at least some wisdom to share. I mean, you a marketing background with less years experience than I have in a relationship, and you used your experience to make conclusions. Is my experience somehow less than yours?
“So yes I think there must be value for both people” who said anything different?
As poorly worded and selfish sounding as it is to say "what's in it for me"?
It's still a fair question to ask hypothetically what a man would get because women are expected to get quite a bit out of marriage.
Those same expectations for what the woman will do for the husband seems to have been lost over the past half a century
@OrallyFixated "I mean, you a marketing background with less years experience than I have in a relationship, and you used your experience to make conclusions. Is my experience somehow less than yours?"
Yes because your experience is based on one person (thus the analogy to a lotto player who won the first time, both you and the winner do not have a typical or expected experience). Mine is based on millions of people.
@bamesjond0069
Stick to marketing
@OrallyFixated love how everyone who takes the side of marriage is always reduced to illogical arguments. Precisely because there is no logical argument to get married (as a normal man anyways).
Why can someone who wins the lotto be honest and be likely to not recommend the lotto as a career but those with good marriages can't admit it's also a lot of luck in trusting someone else since the vast majority are untrustworthy and that just getting married and throwing caution to the wind is a dumb decision but lucky for them it paid off.
I don't see how that takes away from your relationship but all married people get offended to imagine they are lucky. Like they earned their magic all because of what they did when in fact it has nothing to do with them but the other person.
Magic lmao *marriage.
@bamesjond0069
Wait, do you consider all long-term successes relationships to be “lottery ticket relationships?”
Like they just meshed together instantly
without conflict or work?
And what? You’re shocked you haven’t found that?
There’s a reason for that you know.
@UCrayCray long term no. Because they have incentives to stay together. Marriage typically creates and incentive for divorce and all at my expense.
And relationships in my opinion are easy. I don't know what this work stuff everyone talks about. This is from someone who has had 9 year relationship and my other relationships were all 3+ years. I never chose poorly. All my exs are great gfs and any man with any of them did well. I personally have little complaints about women and relationships. Just marriage mostly and a society that encourages women to be as shitty as possible. Those are the only two things I have issue with.
It's easy for me though because I choose right. I deny most women because most women (and men I'm sure but I don't date men) are complete trash useless for relationships. Anyone in the world couldn't make it work with these people. And this it takes tons of work to maintain I'd imagine.
Usually I'm very clear this is what I bring to the table to benefit you. This is what I expect you to bring to benefit me. As long as we color in those lines it's smooth sailing end of story. That's how I as a marketing guy looks at it. Meet or exceed their expectations and they won't leave or fuck you over much and vice versa.
Opinion
17Opinion
Most men aren't capable of vetting such a woman for marriage. They too scared of losing their 2015 Hyundai to them gold diggers lol
For those that get married for the right reasons, yes… for those that get married for the wrong reasons, no…
@Rangers
Right: Love, lust, humor, intelligence, same hobbies, interests and views.
Wrong: Money, utility, convenience, power, resources, loveless sex, to become a single parent.
@TheSpaceGnome you nailed it, thanks 😊
NO!
The median length of marriage is 8 years across most of western society. That is equivalent as betting all you own and most of what you will earn on either red or black in a single roll of a roulette wheel.
But it is worse than roulette because if you win you only win what you have. If you lose though, you pretty much lose everything.
Who would do anything that silly? Men who marry that's who.
They don't have any control. They may do the job they signed up for perfectly. Never cheat, work hard to enable the wife to be the stay at home mom. But 70-80% of women decide to initiate divorce.
I'm not going to the casino for one.
@Ehjoh1 In Australia about 20% of marriages mutual decisions and 70% are solely initiated by the female. But it is fairly easy to motivate your spouse to want a divorce. Cheat is an easy one.
Because it is no fault there is no official stats but it could be 70% female initiate plus 20% female cheating = 90% female initiated. Some of the 70% female initiated could be male cheating of course.
We should all think very hard!
The 8 year is approx the 7 year itch. It is also about the time to pump out 2 babies and get them into elementary school which is also child minding if I am not being too cynical. There is another divorce blip up at 20 years which would be about when the children leave home.
Did you watch the vids? They convinced me! He is saying you have to simp to motivate the female to think you are the best you can do.
I don’t see the point of marrying women these days. If a woman wants to label me a piece of shit, dehumanize me, emasculate me, insult me, whatever she wants, if that’s just through one meeting, through one days worth of interaction on social media or GAG or whatever, why in the blue HELL would I want to be married to a woman like that? I would be repulsed to sleep in the same bed with her. Women want to be the bosses and act rude, fine I hope God blesses all you hateful women the most extravagant life style on earth. But just remember you go back to your creator and you answer God for your actions on earth how you treated others, not your employer proving cheques until retirement.
Not even. In the old days, wife brought peace and nurturing to a family. Nowadays, feminism has destroyed that. By the time she wants to marry and have kids, she's given away her best years to:
- college
- career
- partying
- fucking every guy that makes her wet
Then a loser guy has to pick up what's left over, a woman with severe trauma, can't pair bond, wants to wear the pants, almost if not already dried up uterus, likely cheater
And then his consolation prize is getting his kids turned against him and everything he owns taken away from him when his wife, one of the 70%, files for divorce because she gets bored or finds another loser with more money or a bigger dick.
If you want to have kids, marriage provides the contractual security to build a family on. This counts especially if one of the partners takes some years off work to look after the kids when they are young.
My wife would not have agreed to any other deal to have kids and I can understand that. She's not stupid and I would not have settled for a stupid woman, anyway.
Howeve, without kids I do not see much of a point in marriage.
No women demand it anymore. Maybe back in your day they still thought this way but I could knock up like 10 women by the end of this month if that was my goal. Women are desperate asf to have a man even commit enough to just get them pregnant or have an official relationship title. What woman requires marriage these days? None.
Yes, it could be a trend. Actually, right now I have a girlfriend who has intense baby fever and she does not insist on marriage if only she can have a committed partner and a baby. I think it's a matter of age. At 25 they hold significantly better cards than at 38.
Of course, if you just knock up lots of women you do not have a family, but you must still pay for the kids (at least here in Switzerland), so that's not the best solution, either.
@bamesjond0069 - Actually, one more thing: Right after my divorce I had a few dates with a woman with a very strong career who also wanted a child, but equally loved her job. It did not ultimately work out between us, but with her I might have taken off a few years from work and marriage would have benefitted me. It works both ways by now.
no upside whatsoever. the saddest thing I see is a 35 yr old guy hauling around a wife that gained 50 lbs and 2 kids that eat up all his fun money and if he tries to get away he loses his kids and everything. he could have been single and had the world by the balls if he used his head
There is literally no benefit for a man to be married. It only benefits women and divorce greatly benefits women. I suggest at least getting a good prenuptial agreement and record it on video/audio with the lawyer explaining it to her, then send yourself a copy of the video er o and form in email so you will still have it later.
As in, homebuilding?
I presume you are not just talking coitus.
I have not yet done so, mostly because housing costs are so unpredictable. It could halve or double in value in 3 years, and then halve or double again 3 years later.
I am not certain which of the two is worse, selling because it got so high price, or losing money because it dropped to a quarter of original price.
Simply yes. So it’s a myth that divorce favours women if you look into it it’s very equal with both genders feeling the court favours the other. If you’re very concerned get a prenup. The simple fact is you will never have the same rights or say with your partner unless they’re your spouse, in many situations marriage simply allows a couple more happiness and freedom with each other.
Also I would like to add that women vastly do more of the emotional and domestic labour in household even when they also work full time. There’s no secret behind the reason married men with mods are happiest and live longest but the opposite is true for women.
Men who are competent, think with their brain instead of their penis, and aren't just generally retarded sluts are quite successful in their marriages. There aren't many men like that these days though. You should definitely avoid marriage.
It helps to remember what marriage is FOR. It's NOT for the benefit of the adults. It's to provide the optimal environment for the raising of kids. With that in mind, it only makes sense to get married if you're planning on having kids with a person soon. Otherwise, no--don't bother. But if you ARE going to have kids, they tend to do better in a marriage situation than otherwise.
Logical flaw. Kids may do better in marriage but they do worse in divorce. So you need to average those outcomes to find how well "marriage" as an option is to kids. Inconvenient fact for your point.
@bamesjond0069 I've seen no evidence that suggests that kids of single moms do better than kids whose parents got divorced.
I don't think so. There's a small chance you'll get a good woman, but the risk outweighs the odds.
If women are that bad, then there’s no need for men to engage with them anymore. Just stay single and let the human race die.
That's what's going to happen if this is going to be the trend.
It is worth it for the quality men out there. The rest will always struggle with relationships.
Hmm yeah true. Thanks for being honest.
Worth it, but maybe not legally. You need no paperwork to make a solemn promise to love the partner in sickness and health, etc. Just ask a commoner comrade to say the words and mazel tov!
First of that’s an overly generalization that’s a pet peeve of mine you cannot generalize men you might as well say “Man”
Secondly it is worth it it just goes down to what i said that it is Generalizing
In almost every case, no it isn't
She'll just leave him and take all of his money with her and do it to the next guy
No. Why would you sign a legal contract that will punish you even if you did nothing wrong and award the woman even if she violates or breaks said contract
''Married'' to me is a state of mind. Not a contract.
So: not ''worth it'' any more.
In my culture yes. Women here only make their men's lives better. You won't see entitled and dramatic bitches here
Care to elaborate a bit miss? 🤔
Only poor men marrying well off women. Otherwise no. Not at all.
It provides zero benefits to the man or to the children.
yes it is. get a prenup, and you'll be fine.
Marriage benefits no man except those who profit off of failed ones.
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