What do you think we need before you get married?

[Justneedtokno]

Personally, I think age limit and therapy whether this license, professional or spiritual counselor, the church someone

[BadApple69]

Maturity. And that comes to different people at different times.
Everyone who has ever been married makes mistakes…. As humans we make mistakes. We learn by making mistakes. No church, no therapist, no marriage counselor will be able to teach you how NOT to make mistakes.
Marriage is truly just trial by fire…. Hopefully you pick someone who can understand that we are flawed and willing to work together during difficult time and not against one another.


Again I think maturity is the #1 thing needed.

[SweetJoyGirl]

1. We need to have the same morals and values. He needs to be a Christian man who believes in God.

2. We need to get to know each other VERY well. We also need to know about each other’s pasts and be understanding. Mine is dark and deep, so he has to really be emotionally stable to deal with it, as well as caring. I don’t want to tell him something that I deeply regret and then before I know it he is running for the hills.

3. We need to discuss children, family etc. How we would raise our children, who does what etc.

4. The guy and I would need to have couples counseling. Preferably within our church.

5. The guy and I would definitely need to both see therapists separately. Reason being that I am my own person, and I don’t want to lose myself in a marriage. I also don’t want him to lose himself in our marriage. So, a therapist early on would definitely be a good guide in that.

[SweetJoyGirl]

There is lots more like communication style, love languages etc.

[Staximus]

Why would you need couples counseling before there is even a problem? That's like accepting failure before you've even failed 🤡

[SweetJoyGirl]

@Staximus Because it is a wise choice? You learn more about what getting into a deeper relationship is about. A lot of people do it…….

[Staximus]

That's like looking for problems when there is none, pretty negative

[SweetJoyGirl]

@Staximus You are 47…
W-wow…
Well, to each their own. 😊

[Staximus]

Ok, I'm 47. What the hell does that have to do with the price of tea in China? Only idiots go to a relationship counselor when there's no problems between them yet. "Oh, we don't have any problems yet. Let's go look for some problems to argue over, we need more drama in our lives!"

[SweetJoyGirl]

@Staximus Take a deep breath, hun. It is not that deep. lol 😂
It is just for guidance. lol

[DizzyDesii]

I think we just both need to be decisive and on the same page/timeline. I don’t need some marriage counselor who can barely save their own marriage trying to tell us what to do

[HawkPerception]

What you need before marriage is absolute trust and faith that the person you marry will always be faithful to you and you should also know if they are compatible with you personality-wise. Therapy is not needed between 2 adults that can communicate with each other maturely.

[MisterWack]

Mental fortitude, financial stability, healthy mindset, and are doing great in life with positivity.

Children will make all those more unstable than they already are, so work on your best self before you self destruct. Strengthen those pillars and you shall strengthen your ability to raise a happy, beautiful, wonderful family.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

A Brain Scan Is Highly Recommended!

[MicahRaine]

• God
• Good values
• Total commitment
• Good communication
• Aligning goals

[Alwayreckles93]

One important thing please if you want a wedding please just please allowed people to bring they're children along. I am sick and upset about this whole child free wedding trend. It's disrespectful.

[Ladsin2]

I don't know about age limit, but I'd be in support of a test about their knowledge of the other. So many people seem to be getting married without ever discussing difficult topics like child-rearing, religion, politics, finances etc. These things are incredibly important, and major causes of marital strife. The conversations should be had before deciding to make a lifelong commitment.

[Caroline91]

Common foundation of values, commitment to commitment.

[Grond21]

Commonality of vision, morals, standards, and attraction. That is the bare minimum. No toxicity, no red flags. Then get with a marriage prep specialist. In my church there are tons of them

[DrPepper12]

Communication
Resources
Stable jobs
Discussion of kids
" Of religion
" Of bills
" Of in laws
" Of wills

[SunnyRS]

I think the most important thing you need before marrying someone is a sense of trust in each other and also knowing each other.

[bobalife]

I agreed, many times people divorce because they found out things that should have been known and discuss before taking that big step

[SunnyRS]

I completely agree, it is a big step and no one should take it in a hurry.

[bobalife]

Yeah, I think it’s important to do it when both people are ready and it will look differently to everyone :)

[SunnyRS]

Look differently to everyone, how?

[bobalife]

There’s no limited or right timeline, everyone goes at their own pace and what feels right for them. For example, I have a friend who married her man after a year and they’re still happily married with a kid. I have other friends who has been together for years and finally married.

[SunnyRS]

That's very true.
Everyone has their own pace

[bobalife]

Respectfully so 😊

[Nikki1989]

You need two people that don't share such backward view points as you. Then you might have a chance at a successful marriage.

[BCRanger10]

Shared values, emotional maturity, and a common vision for what each person wants in life and from their marriage.

[Gdude9]

1 self confidence
2 know who you marrying
3 enjoy your life don’t waste your energy on people who don’t care

[fantasticass]

You should live together for a year. You really don't know anyone until you live together. After a year if you are still together then get married.

[luvstoned4him]

To decide upon finances, kids if any, home, get tests done, counselling is good, meet the family

[Iron_Man]

Age limit before you get married and therapy if somebody’s gonna propose to you, I think they already know about your age it shouldn’t any longer be discussed you’re both adults

[Iron_Man]

And if you’re not arguing or having problems, why do you need therapy

[Anonymous]

Faith in her. That I actually believe she's capable of a lifetime commitment.

[Itsmeirem]

Financial independence and respect to each other.

[Crazzyyworld]

He needs to steal money and buy a house and she need to prostitute to support her family?

[noohair]

What we need before you? We before you? WTF?

[msc545]

You each need a lawyer

[NathanDavis]

I need a girl who knows how to bake...

[Caroline91]

Is she gonna bake you a birthday cake?

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 homemade baked Cheetos?

[Caroline91]

@NathanDavis at least throw on some chocolate frosting and make it a Cheetos cake!

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 now, if I ever eat chocolate frosted/covered Cheetos... that will definitely be out of love...

[scott04sa22]

I not interested in marriages

[Jennz6]

Sounds good

[gorydetails]

prenup.