What do you want in a wedding?

While I'd very much enjoy a wedding like this, don't laugh, or I'll laugh 10× harder at what you say.

And I tend to laugh out loud a lot, so watch it😈
I'd love to go to my Uncle's ranch, where my cousin was married to her husband, who is a man I've formed a very close relationship with and accepted him greatly into the family.

The ranch is over 300 acres, and I always like going there. My family would fill up the seats, and my girlfriend's grandma (her only surviving family member), and her best friend, Eva, along with her boyfriend, Andrei, and Yulia, if I can raise her spirits to come (she's still mourning the death of her husband when he was killed by a Russian mortar team in Bakhmut).

We'd have the ceremony, and get straight to partying, we'd all get tipsy, at least, and go out to hunt hogs with night vision at night afterwards. Then to celebrate, we'd all go to Drive tanks and take an old, destroyed car, and shoot it with a tank!

And of course, we'd get super freaky together in the bedroom after we dance together.

However, we still both need to get our careers started before we can afford to do all of that. What we can do, is get legally married in a courthouse, which only costs $100 per couple. So legally, in the sovereign state of Texas, we would be husband and wife, as far as the law is concerned, but the wedding would have to wait a bit, until we can afford all of those expenses.

I've looked at wedding dress prices, and damn, the dress makers are some GREEDY b@stards. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. Just kidding, I'm glad I said it, cause it's true.

For the bachelor's party, we'd shoot hogs from a helicopter. What? Oh yes, you heard that right. Hogs are the most destructive sons of guns in the whole state, they stomp on crops and destroy fences, letting out all of the cattle, costing farmers millions every year.

There's a place where you can shoot hogs from a helicopter. It's expensive, though.
What do you want in a wedding?
What do you want in a wedding?
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