Why do people look down on single women in their 30s?

[Anonymous]

Not sure if it’s just a cultural thing, because where I’m from if you’re over 25 and still unmarried you’re basically considered a “leftover”. This whole toxic standard is actually causing harm to lots of women. A lot of these woman ended up marrying any guy that is willing to marry them to avoid judgment. I have friends who are in their mid-late 30s who are single, and has no intention of ever getting married or have children. So why are people still looking down on these women?

[NamerOfStars]

For one thing, because they're so fragile that they're harmed by social disapproval. You get married to the closest guy, making what's supposed to be a lifelong commitment, for fear people will say unkind things about you? You lack the mental and moral resiliency we expect of a fourth grader, but you're in your 30's?

For another, because the population of every First World country (except the US and New Zealand, both sustained by immigration) is falling precipitously, and by 30, a woman's fertility has taken a big hit- and geriatric pregnancy starts at 35. You're not fulfilling your social or biological roles, but lack the wherewithal to tell these people to fuck off, that your life is your own.

As a woman, your brain pushes you to seek consensus, and gives you a fear of social ostracism greater than any man would have- but your instincts don't control you unless you let them; you're a thinking, reasoning being, same as a man is. Stand boldly as a single woman, or debase yourself for society's approval, but trying to walk around with one foot in each camp is just going to leave you disappointed.

[Asker]

I’m traditional, I’m getting married and want to have children so this won’t apply to me personally. But even I feel the pressure to pop out kids asap. Just can’t afford it just yet…

There is however a group of women who simply want to live their life on their own, without a partner and/or kids. They’re not harming anyone so I don’t get why they’d be ostracized. They’re not looking for anyone’s approval and are just simply living minding their own business yet people seem to pester them and tell them they’ve “failed as a woman”.

[HighValue]

After 35 women have less than a 1% chance of having a successful pregnancy/healthy birth. That puts off any decent quality man that wants to create a family. That means after 30 it will be too late for most women.

Besides that, most of the women that claim they were too busy with education and building a career to have a relationship are lying. There was plenty of time, they were just focused on casual sex/friends with benefits/ons which makes them forever low quality and undesirable to any good quality man.

Having kids is too expensive? That is just not true for low income people. They can actually get earned income credit, tax deductions, food stamps, free medical benefits, free breakfast and lunch for their kids, etc. Kids are only too expensive for the lower middle class income earners because they pay more taxes and don't qualify for all the free benefits from the government.

It is fine if a woman is single in her 30s +, she just shouldn't expect a good quality man to be interested in her. Many of them are upset about that, and that is why many women purposely give bad advice to younger women out of jealousy of the younger women that haven't made the same mistakes yet, and they do it because they are angry at the good quality men that have no interest in her anymore.

The main things that makes women undesirable are, a promiscuous past, fat, tattoos, debt, being unwilling to sign a prenuptial agreement, and being past 30. And no, it doesn't mean she will be left for someone younger when she is older, she just needs to be younger for a NEW relationship, NOT just to continue a current one.

[Asker]

Most of my friends who are still single in their 30s are either doctors or “professionals” (lawyers, engineers, architects) so they spend most of their days drowning in work sadly… A lot of them ended up being left by their man because they prioritize work over everything else.

Where I live, kids are very expensive. Most people still rely on their parents/grandparents to help out with their children’s expenses.

[Simslover92]

Because like Nikki1989 said, it's expected for women in her 30s to be married with kids but it's not reality in today's society. First off, the economy is not like it once was. There are a lot of us who are struggling to make ends meet with student loans and hardly have time to date and some of us just don't want to go through the whole getting married and having kids which is okay. Marriage and children aren't for every woman. It's frowned upon by a lot of the older generation because that's what they did in their time. So they try to put that pressure unto us women in our 30s who are still single.

I personally want to get married and have children but I can understand why some women don't want that. They should have the right to not want to have a traditional lifestyle.

[Asker]

Yes!! Having children in this economy is like mission (almost) impossible… I definitely would love to have kids soon but I know I can’t afford it.

Financially speaking, it’s definitely the more economically efficient decision to stay single and childless.

[Simslover92]

Yes it definitely is!

[sawno]

Your highlighting why I think the education system is actively harming women. Your signing up for debt that forces you to adopt a working role and the education system drags out way to long. Would be much healthier if a girl graduates and can have a job at age 20 with a debt she can pay back with 6 months of salary. Unrealistic you'd think? That example was me.

[Vegasrunner]

@asker That's such an interesting take. So essentially you're saying it's nearly impossible for women to raise kids w/out a man?

[Asker]

@sawno honestly I’m luckier than most because my parents paid for my college tuition so I’m debt free. I graduated at 20 and was working a decent job then went back to grad school. Things have been really tough though ever since Covid… haven’t been able to financially recover from the hit

[Asker]

@Vegasrunner for me personally yes it would be nearly impossible! Even after I get married later, I will still have to work because living off of a single income just ain’t gonna cut it (if we have kids) lol.

I know lots of woman that can make it work but being a single parent (either a mom/dad) is tough either way.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker statistically single fathers tend to do better than single mothers.

[Asker]

@Vegasrunner true, but it’s still no walk in the park. I think it’s harder for women for sure but being a single parent; having to balance between work and raising a kid is definitely challenging.

[Vegasrunner]

@Asker Agreed

[KrakenAttackin]

You have the right to be a corporate slave and indebted NPC of the education/indoctrination machine.

[Asker]

@KrakenAttackin I don’t want to be an NPC though which is why I chose to start my own business. I thought it would give me more time and freedom but now I just feel like I’m constantly working lol

[Nikki1989]

That societal stigma against single women in their 30s is rooted in outdated gender roles and expectations. It is a harmful stereotype that isn't based in reality.

[Asker]

Yes I agree… it’s sad and puts too much unnecessary pressure to get married

[Adel50]

@Nikki1989 Why isn't it based in reality?

[Nikki1989]

@Adel50 Because it not like that for most women.

[Adel50]

@Nikki1989 What's not like that?

[Finchie40]

Because we live in a judgmental society where people try to rub their 2 cents together, that really don’t know shit , Being single doesn’t make you a bad person , being married doesn’t make you a good person So fuck what other people think or say , just live your life as happy as you can be , we are all going to die of something , so do what makes you happy it’s your choice and your decision, no one else can decide that for you

[Asker]

Very well said sir!

[HawkPerception]

I don't necessarily look down on them, but I do somewhat assume that they're a likely to be classified in one of these categories

• Played around too much back in their youth and had a hoe phase. Now they're jaded and find that most men suck
• Radical feminists and self-proclaimed "strong independent woman that does not need a man"
• T

[Asker]

What could the women that fall into the last category be like then, “T”? 😁

But yeah I can agree. Some are just bitter, others are just unlucky in love.

[HawkPerception]

Pretty annoyed GaG still hasn't fixed their issue with opinions being cut off. But I think the other 2 categories I mentioned are:
1) They don't have minds of their own and just listened to their parents to not date or have sex and are waiting for marriage to have sex and because of that they demonize sex to an extent
2) They have no social tact or just don't have traits that most people desire in a partner, whether it's personality issues or they lack any effort in their appearance and fitness

[Asker]

I feel bad for those who fall into the first, and the second to last categories because life has made them that way. But as far as the rest goes, it’s a choice that they’ve made.

[Miristheiss]

Well, we know, deep down in their heart of hearts, most women do want to get married and have a life partner. Those that boast that they want to remain unattached for life are fewer numbers than they brag about.

That means a woman has taken the most youthful, beautiful, fertile years of her life and willfully chosen to pursue career, sleep around, get set in her ways and accumulate relationship baggage and trauma and not lock down a life partner when she was the most alluring and attractive and had the best chance to do it.

She is now starting to age, get wrinkles, we know she hasn't been saving herself for marriage so we are probably looking at 12-15 years of being sexually active, having who knows how many sex partners and crap going on, any pregnancy is getting close to high risk pregnancy now. Her ability to "fall in love" and bond with one person is shot based on how much she's been ran through, she is so set in her ways there is no ability to "grow together" like a 19 year old virgin couple would do. She is most likely bitter, tons of baggage and issues she has due to all the relationship stuff she's experienced.

As a wife. As a life partner. As a possible mom. We really are getting to the bottle of the barrel with 30 year old women. Casual stuff? Sure, that is probably fine. Life partner? Not the ideal option.

[Asker]

Yeah I know a couple women who are still single in their late 30s/early 40s. They drown themselves in work, their work is basically their baby. I respect that, but I think a humans it’s in our nature to crave companionship. I believe a lot of these women are genuinely happy but I’m sure there’s a handful that are in denial

[OlofssonBengtsson]

Well, that is called karma. You make fun of men for being lonely or virgins or whatever and a backlash of the same equal amount of hate comes back around. The things people say have consequences for others around them. Before it was seen as normal to make fun of men who are lonely or lack relationships with women, but now that is desensitized and most of them are used being made fun of.

People think it's my body my choice, but if you drive a motorcycle with no helmet and hurt yourself you will be disabled and other people have to pay for your disability and takes away from other people that needed it more. But a lot of people underestimate what they say and do and how it effects everyone around them.

[Asker]

The average woman wouldn’t make fun of men just for being single/a virgin though. That’s the very loud minority group of women that’s stirring up trouble. I think the woke feminist and red pill movement is just creating a bigger divide between the genders…

There’s a rise in women who never want to get married or bear children, birth rates are declining because of it and some countries are now even paying its citizens to get married and give birth to help with maintaining the population (Japan, Singapore, Italy).

The ladies who are choosing to stay single and childless are doing so out of choice, so I don’t get why they’re being looked down on for choosing to stay single.

[Christian_Cartier]

"The ladies who are choosing to stay single and childless are doing so out of choice"

No. They have convinced themselves its a choice because they have no other option. It's called cognitive dissonance. No-one chooses to be unloved.

[Asker]

@Christian_Cartier my friend is single and child free in her late 30s. Her baby is her company that she built but she does get laid. I just don’t think she likes relationships overall, she loves her work more than her relationship…

[Lliam]

Once I was over 30, myself, I never did.

When I was 34, I had an incredibly sexy girlfriend who was 32. She was finalizing her divorce and was sharing custody with her 4 kids. We lived together for 8 or 9 months. Things were great at first, but her psycho gradually began to show.

When I was 36, I met a 30 year old. She turned out to be the best girlfriend I ever had. Her looks were my idea of the feminine ideal from head to toe. She was hypesexual and orgasmic, but I loved everything else about her, too. I wound up loving her with all my heart. We lived together for almost two years.

I met my (future) wife when I was 40. She is 2.5 years younger. We've been happily married now for over 28 years.

Women over 30 can be amazing. The only ones I wouldn't have dated would have been weirdos who had no sexual experience for religious, cultural, or other strange reasons.

[Asker]

I agree! Women who are over 30 usually know what they want and will no longer tolerate BS. Love can happen at any age, so happy that you found your “one”. All the best to you!

[Lliam]

True. Experience brings knowledge and wisdom.
And thank you. :D

[lightbulb27]

historically, people whom are alone, without support, without family... are in trouble. going to suffer.

peopel don't like being around sad, suffering, miserable... they end up cast out. only way out of that was religous life... nun, mother teresa... queen of whatever.

a lot has changed, they can be single and fulfilled lives. but social behavior doesn't change fast.

I don't look down on them but I know plenty of women over time... some not happy being single and others whom gave up and just living life to fullest on their own.

[Asker]

Valid points. Humans are social by nature, we do seek out companionship. Some people just found them in pets/friends/family.

[lightbulb27]

I occasionally see olde people around... male and female. alone. no family. That is a scary prospect... alone, no support, your body and brain doesn't work as well. When they lack resources, they suffer.
Those with children and resources, have comfort.
It's wise to build a family support system if at all possible.
30's is young... you have no problems... but opportunties. but stay focused.

[AmeerX]

I know why I don't want to do with women who are above 35 even though I am friends with some. This is especially relationship related.
1. They lose fertility and it is sad. They have to be very special to me to want them.
2. They have developed rigid attitude of life. Some are stuck in time. Someone who had a bad experience with a past lover, someone who is victim of pleasure. Someone just discouraged from relationship and marriage.
3. With age they become bitter unfortunately. Not all of course but they do.


So, I don't want to say bad things, but it is sad to hear and see whatever happens to them.

[Alwayreckles93]

YOU ARE DISGUSTING 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡 WHt exactly do you mean successful beautiful wealthy woman are bitter?
You need to get your brain cells exam. Get me a professional in your area. I hate how men your age are close with their moms. Like your a grow men not a kindergarten little boy.

[Alwayreckles93]

Your comment is very offensive I will report you Mr. Karen!

[AmeerX]

I should report you @alwayreckless93

I told the truth. You are crazy and seeking attention from others.

Tell me if women become more sexually healthy with age? You are the Karen here.

If you had read my comment you would understand. Is it a cool thing for women being used by a guy for so many years and finally get a ohh honey we are not going to marry.

I sure am not that type of guy who ruins a woman's youth after me.

[Alwayreckles93]

You did not said the truth , You have something against older woman and you should feel ashamed of your self. YOU SIR ARE AN AGAINST. FUNNY HOW COME YOU NEVER MENTIONED YOUNGER WOMAN. I CALLED HOA ON A 20 YEAR OLD FOR WEARING A BIKINI IN HER YARD. SICK you said hateful hurtful things about older woman. Why?

[Alwayreckles93]

You are an old grandpa your old yourself you are no longer 20 . Act your age!

[Alwayreckles93]

Older woman why are not bitter YOU are!

[AmeerX]

Perhaps you should go talk to the older women who had their heart bitter and broken by their betraying lovers. Don't tell me I am right or wrong. Do your own research.
I have nothing against older women. If a woman older than me wanted to marry and have kids with me I would love to marry her but that is not going to happen because they have close themselves to marriage in a lot of cases. I cried for at least 5 women who were older than me but they were duped by sick Psychos some to even 15 years long sham relationships without commitment and children in the picture.

[AmeerX]

Now go and annoy someone else. You are crazy for slinging slender on others out of no where.

[AmeerX]

Shut up and get lost. You are probably bitter your husband doesn't listen to you over his mom and venting it out here.

[Alwayreckles93]

AmeerX you millennials men are useless disgusting trash lol. In fact I am friends with woman who are 47 ,48 and they are successful and great role models they don't need useless trash like you to be successful. You say you don't have anything against older woman but you DO BECAUSE ALL you said is negative stuff. How about you say older woman are wealthy, successful and beautiful! My best friend she is 48 but physically she looks 25 people always complement her about how young and beautiful she looks. Unlike younger woman disgusting wearing crops tops younger woman all dress like prostitutes. Me crazy NO YOU OLD MEN THE ONLY CRAZY MENTALLY UNSTABLE ONE HERE IS YOUR UGLY FACE!

[Alwayreckles93]

So I find your useless comment very offensive and disrespectful!

[Alwayreckles93]

So shame on you for disrespecting older woman FYI older woman are full of wisdom. You clown !

[Alwayreckles93]

So do not come up here telling me to do my research I am friends with woman over 45 and they sure are smart successful and wealthy they have class and own mansion.

[Alwayreckles93]

Well I can't blame them if they made your ugly nose cry they wanted a real men a husband material not a immature men child like you.

[Alwayreckles93]

Because that's what you are a Men child!

[AmeerX]

Stop trolling. You are have zero idea and you think you know things better than everyone. Aren't you the dumb Karen everyone hates. Begone

[Alwayreckles93]

The only disgusting troll here is you! Go complain to your disgraceful useless mother. I can see your nasty mother did a horrible job at raising you! It's your fault if you didn't made hateful comments about older woman then no one would be complaining! Dumb me oh you mean your mother is dumb ok I don't care but if you say so.

[AmeerX]

You are crazy. It is your mom who did a bad job raising you. You sure are missing a brain and tolerance to divergent opinion.
You need validation 24/7 otherwise you think you are useless.

[Alwayreckles93]

You don't know me. I bet your ass must be full of debt and still living with mommy. I wouldn't be surprised. I live my life way. much better then you. I bet I am way more successful then you! Yet your ass is in debts with credit cards. While mommy pays for your bills.

[Alwayreckles93]

I hate my mom so I can care less if you talk trash about her.

[Alwayreckles93]

Your ass is the Karen here looser!

[Alwayreckles93]

Oh don't think I am useless I am way better than your broke ass and I live my life way better then you.

[Alwayreckles93]

I tell you what ALL MILLENNIALS GUYS ARE USELESS NOT HUSBAND MATERIAL!

[AmeerX]

Lol, contrary to popular belief, I never got into debt and making a good living God bless. I have no need of credit cards unlike you crazy shopaholic American fools who think using Credit card makes you rich. I pay cash for all my bills and I can objectively say to you I have more servants and workers that answer to me. How about you now go cry in the corner trying to flaunt your success to someone who really cares about money a woman makes.

I can't believe you judge others based off your own stupid notion of money. To you a man is nothing if he is not made of money. Sorry to pop your balloon 🎈 but you have shown that you only care about money and appearances. Stop living under a rock

[Alwayreckles93]

I'm getting exterminator to kick your ass! I will tell him you harassed me and insulted me. I bet you must be friends with that looser user Fuentes guy.

[AmeerX]

You are broken soul. I don't know who you talk about but you surely got a bad husband to blame for your bitterness towards men. Pathetic and thank you for proving my point that women after age 35 become stuck in time

[Alwayreckles93]

I can say whatever I want and how I wanted! I bet your mommy is the one paying for your ass. Me I don't need my parents. Your angry because a boss babe super woman is way more successful than you. I always tell people if they have financial issues it's their own fault! If I have the good lifestyle it's all thank to ME! andy hard work. I mist and ditch family gatherings , funerals of family member are sick I can care less because at the end of the day family will not care about your success so you have to forget about parents extended family in order to be successful! Unlike you still want your mommy. WELL LET ME TELL YOU THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND YOUR MY MOM OR YOUR FAMILY!

[Alwayreckles93]

I WILL DEMAND! YOU HAVE RESPECT FOR MY HUSBAND! FYI MY HUSBAND HENIS A GOOD MAN OF GOD AND FYI HE IS A CHURCH LEADER!

[Alwayreckles93]

Such DISRESPECTFUL THE ISSUE HERE IS WITH ME SO LIVE MY HUSBAND ALONE YOU DEMONIC CREATER SON OF SATAN!

[Alwayreckles93]

IN FACT MY HUSBAND HE NOT BAD IS WAY MUCH BETTER THEN YOU IMMATURE MEN CHILD!

[AmeerX]

Why should I respect your husband? He can be whatever he wants. I don't know the guy like you don't know me.
You think anyone else except what you chose and accept is all wrong. Get out of the rock you are living under and go see life outside of the small world you have made it out to be.

And shut up, you think all religious when it suits you, thing is all the things you think you did are God's blessing. You probably think you are all so cool while all the people that are not like you are stupid. You are a heartless woman. Do you think you are a good person if you don't even care about your parents and husband and your children and think what you are today yid because of your own hard work.
I also ditch family gatherings but not because of the way you say.
You are barking like a dog and it's stupid. I didn't say I was facing financial issues and I never did and if you want to go make comparisons you will lose because you live your life in debt and credit cards.
What's a good lifestyle? Is it to be slave to your pleasures?

[Alwayreckles93]

If I decided to be nice to my parents and obey to them I WOULD'VE BEEN A BROKE ASS ! GUESS WHAT I AM SMART BECAUSE I DECIDED SUCCESS I KNEW WHAT WAS BEST FOR ME!

[Alwayreckles93]

DON'T TELL ME TO SHUT UP YOUR UGLY FACE IT'S WHAT NEEDS TO SHUT UP YOU KNOW I AM 💯👌 CORRECT!

[AmeerX]

Ahh, wrong, you think you are right to make a "Smart decision". Go learn Deuteronomy again. You think you are a good successful person but you forego your principles to get where you are.
Please don't try to preach others about success.

I am not interested in someone like you who thinks world revolves around and that they only live once.

[Alwayreckles93]

You retard I know how to managed money and I only care about my husband and kids. I it's not my obligation to lovey parents. If people get in your way of becoming successful it is best to cut them off. I pay a sweet lady to clean my Victorian house that is now paid off.

[Alwayreckles93]

I don't care I ALL YOU MILLENNIALS MEN ARE USELESS AND WORTHLESS!

[Alwayreckles93]

You don't know me I am a good person I am always donating to the church.

[AmeerX]

I hope you get a good look in the mirror.
You don't manage money well. You are just arrogant and vain.

[Alwayreckles93]

Older woman are always successful unlike disgusting younger woman. I try to get one fired according to the manager she did nothing wrong well I had to find a lawyer to get my revenge.

[Alwayreckles93]

I am sure I can sue you for makung hateful disrespectful comments about older woman. Older woman are the only woman who are successful wealthy and have life put together unlike younger woman no I am not jelly or a younger woman's youth!

[Alwayreckles93]

I do managed my money well. I am beautiful and good looking people always tell me I look 19 unlike you your ugly face has wrinkles and you look like a 90 year old men. Hey do you need help finding a anti wrinkle treatment around your area. I am sure you need a wrinkle treatment. Me I look younger I bet people will mistake me think I am your daughter lol.

[Alwayreckles93]

I am taking pictures of your comments andy best friend is laughing and thinks you are being ridiculous and unreasonable.

[Alwayreckles93]

Older woman are not bitter SAY IT! AND YOU BETTER APOLOGIZE AND RECORRET YOUR STATEMENT. The main reason I am angry at you you made that horrible statement about older woman. TAKE IT DOWN NOW!!! NO WONDER BECAUSE OF MEN LIKE YOU A LIT OF WOMAN DECIDED TO STAY 30 AND SINGLE BECAUSE HUMANS LIKE YOUR MOM DIDN'T raised a gentle men they raised a momma's boy.

[Alwayreckles93]

Back in highschool a guy broke it off with me because I choose his mom and little 8 year old sister at the time over he he never spend time with me. I always wanted him to be with me 24/7 but he wanted his stupid mommy little sister and friends. He regreted his decision on break up with me.

[Alwayreckles93]

AND BETTER SHUT UP AND RESPECT! MY HUSBAND HE IS A WONDERFUL GOOD HUMAN BEING SO KEEP YOUR UGLY MOUTH SHUT!

[AmeerX]

Oh you better shut up too. You think this is about you. What's your problem coming in my comment uninvited. Do you have a head injury that makes you put arguments for nothing?
I am pretty sure you are making it up. You are bitter because you got told no despite your attempts to seduce a guy. Perverted mind you have

[Alwayreckles93]

The only perverted one her is your ass! You only like younger woman. YOU MADE HORRIBLE STATEMENT ABOUT OLDER WOMAN. I COME INTO YOUR DISGUSTING UGLY COMMENT BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO PUT YOUR ASS INTO YOUR PLACE. HOW DARE YOU MAKE SUCH HATEFUL NEGATIVE COMMENTS ABOUT OLDER WOMAN!!!

[Alwayreckles93]

Woman do not need a men in order to become successful. Older woman are beautiful empowering.

[Asker]

Honestly, valid points. A couple of my friends who are over 35 and single are still hung up on their last ex so they choose to remain single and focus on work. Not all woman are like that for sure but the ones that I personally know falls into the list that you mentioned.

[AmeerX]

@asker
It's not exactly age per say but the stuck up part. That gets to them. I know women can have children till 40 but why wait till 40 to have children when you can have them early.
I actually asked a couple of 35+ year old women for marriage and relationship in the past but they all had similar replies like what about our comfortable lives, the travel, the party etc. Why do you marry? As a woman I see them married to lead a good family oriented life. If someone is going to say they are focusing on career well into 35+ they are cruel to themselves.
If I am the husband it is my responsibility to finance the home and her to be frugal about it.
And can you believe it, even alwayreckles93 is wrong for saying independent woman are empowering. What's so empowering if you have a lousy attitude towards family and only think of life in terms of happiness.

Marriage is not Disneyland, marriage is important, it is to have kids, I would be surprised how many people would be like they are if virginity and children after marriage was considered sacred. Waiting for someone, showing patience in life is important aspects of a disciplined life's journey.

[Asker]

I see marriage as a partnership where you can share the burden of life with another person in pursue of a better life. You can still party and travel even after you get married. For me personally, the only reason I waited until I’m now 30 to get married was because I had a lot of emotional/mental maturing that I needed to go through, having to clean up my trauma baggage before going into married life.

I do think being an independent woman can be very empowering. But just because you’re independent then doesn’t mean that you can’t have a man that will also support you. My friend who was too busy building up her career ended up getting left by her man/exes every single time because she neglected her relationship. She’s now choosing to remain forever single and yet she’s still chasing after her ex…

[AmeerX]

It's because women are not the breadwinner in a family, it is the men who are expected to take care of them. A guy if he became choosy will definitely get flak but a woman won't get same. Women and men all can have a good married life if they try to make things work. And don't listen to Alwayreckles93. She just thinks all millennial men should go die.
If you want a man to take care of you we have to stick with someone. If someone keeps jumping off of relationships trying to find perfect man she will remain single. Rest I think wealth is from God, it is people's short sightedness to think that a rich man will remain so and a poor man will remain so. Lives change but staying loyal and sticking together is key to marriage. For better or worst, not for better and better only. Rest if someone is so focused on wealth, to me it is a big red flag. I mean I have enough praise God but it doesn't mean I am to spread it all in front of my spouse and spoil her. If someone either man or woman spoils their children or each other with money then they are doomed to poverty and misery. I am not someone who will be slave to pleasure.

[AmeerX]

And alwayreckles93 speaks of wealth and not being appreciated. She is just a bitter girl. I can bet her husband is not happy if that's the way she talks about men.

You attract what you think. Don't think negatively and God will send you a good husband.

Ohh and I had an ex fiance from arranged , let me tell you something she is not clearly telling. Do you expect your husband to give you all the luxury in life at age 30 what your parents enjoy together at age 60? If you do then you are not going to get far in marriage.
It is wrong to have unusually high expectations. Only man who will sate your thirst for wealth will be some 55-60 years old man, not a young man.

It is my own belief that Wealth is from God, He chooses whosoever He shall give, it has nothing to do with being a good person or a bad person. Evil
Pharoahs, Karoon and even evil Kings like Goliath and Nimrod had lots of wealth. But they fell from God's grace.

On the other hand, People like Job suffered disease, loss of children at sea, and loss of health, loss of wealth and even tempted by Devil to become ungrateful to God but Job persevered.
King Saul, people disliked him for being an ordinary person. If people thought like Alwayreckles93 then they all deserve to be in hell for not taking care of their wives.
Does she follow the scripture? No, she doesn't.

[AmeerX]

I know what you mean. I just want you to understand a basic difference. Life is not for experiments.
Life can be lived lovely even by poor people (I am not a poor and I don't call other people who are less fortunate losers, I sit with them, I learn from them and it keeps me humble that there are a lot of people who try to live honest lives). Be my guest come to my country, you can get the most loving man who can give you everything but at the expense of others by taking on bribes. You can have that type of men but that's not me.

We take care of our children, put them in college, pay for their university fee. Have zero debt on ourselves and frankly a lot less troubles to deal with because we try to keep our lives simple. It is not an achievement to get a car you like Mercedes and show off. We don't do that and I certainly don't like people who are show offs.
God asked us to be humble, to be virtuous, to be looking towards Him. To live within our means. We will have a life past this life where our desires can be fulfilled but right now we only have temptations and tests.

[ManOnFire]

Men who are single face much more judgment, whether they are in their 30s, 20s, or even 40s. When you're a single man in today's world you are scrutinized for it more and get labeled as having something wrong with you or even people thinking you're gay.

You also can be seen as you must not be confident with women, and then if you are talking to women people will just think you must be desperate and trying hard to get laid. Even other men treat men this way.

[Asker]

Oh that’s interesting. I guess it’s a cultural thing because where I live men who are single in their 30s are praised for focusing on building their career. They’ll get judged only when they’re still single in their 40s

[ManOnFire]

Other countries are different. In the United States women are hailed sexually for just about everything, while men are looked down on for still being single or for even just not having sex period. Once upon a time this country was like yours where single women were scrutinized more, but with the age of women now being put on a pedestal, their singleness isn't as scrutinized as much as men's now.

[Asker]

Wow that’s interesting! I lived in the US for a bit for college but I was super young then so I never noticed and judgment for being single.

I guess it definitely varies by culture then. Why do you think men get judged more harshly tho in the US?

[ManOnFire]

Men are expected to be the ones to take action, be the go-getters. And men are expected to be successful at having sex and being dominant. Both men and women expect this from men.

So when that isn't happening guys get seen as having something wrong with them or lacking confidence. A lot of dudes today are just scared of approaching women. They're afraid of not being rejected, but HOW a woman will reject him.

[Asker]

That makes sense, expectations are always getting higher to the point that it’s basically unrealistic.

[Saramad_Hill]

I'm not looking down on anyone who is single regardless of their age, because frankly it's just really difficult to find someone you really like with all of the fighting going on as well as general technology induced hermitism. I'm thirty and childless, why would I be upset with a woman for not having a partner? Times are rough and your worth isn't tied to whether or not you were lucky enough to find a partner yet.

[Asker]

Very logical and realistic! The dating scene have changed and the state of the current economy is not helping either lol

[puurikke]

It’s cultural, in my country it’s normal (but not the norm) to be single ik your 30s.
When I visited the USA, friends of my sister in law (American) asked me why she didn’t have children yet. She was already 30 years old so it was time. That’s 2 steps further than a relationship.

[Asker]

That’s very true. In my culture you’re expected to be married by your mid 20s (way too young in my opinion).

[Smegskull]

I think it is more "ignore" than "look down on". But from a narcissistic perspective those would be the same thing.

Why is it toxic?
What makes it a standard?
Who's fault is the alleged harm? (not sure I agree it is harmful)

[Asker]

In my culture they are actually “looked down on” and shamed for it. I’m getting married soon and even then I’m still getting judged for not marrying sooner lol.

[Smegskull]

I would still need more information to comment fairly. Marriage is usually just a proxy for other things, (Providing heirs, moving out and leaching off of someone else, getting off welfare, etc), that are a failure to perform. So it could be fair judgement and the "marriage" angle is just being used to deflect.

[Asker]

Once you’re married you’re pretty much expected to pop out babies as soon as possible, when in reality, it’s not that simple. Kids are very expensive so it puts unnecessary pressure to the newly weds to hurry up and have kids just for the sake of the in-laws, even when they aren’t financially/mentally ready just yet. This is why I think the expectations that comes along with “marriage” are harmful

[Anonymous]

It's nature. Women rapidly lose their fertility once they hit their 30s. Since survival of the species is nature's most important function for any species it designed women through evolution to be motivated to have children before their fertility is gone. And it designed the human society to put pressure on them to do so.

If enough women did not follow their natural inclination we wouldn't be here to talk about it.

[Asker]

That’s a very logical way to go about this. I appreciate your thoughts!

[Opinion Owner]

Thank you for that response.

[Bkay123]

I’m single too. But I don’t look down on single women in their 30s. It’s their choice and their life what ever makes them happy . As a single guy, here’s to not finding anyone. #ForeverAlone

[Asker]

Exactly, it’s their choice and as long as it makes them happy. Hope you can still find happiness and a sense of fulfillment!

[Bkay123]

Thanks but I’ve given up. It’s tough out there. But I hope the same for you!

[CarolinaGirl5]

100% agree with @KrakenAttackin.. it's one thing to have been married yet it just didn't work and that's why you're single but to be single and never married? Wow.. Also, at your age why are you single?

[KrakenAttackin]

I am thankfully divorced.

[Sunlight4]

@KrakenAttackin why is that?

[KrakenAttackin]

@Sunlight4 I would break my fingers if I started typing about this.

[CarolinaGirl5]

🤣🤣🤣

[Asker]

I’m getting married next year but I’m seeing more women who chose to be forever single and child-free. I don’t see anything wrong with it if that’s what they want so I don’t get why they are being judged for it if they’re not hurting anyone

[CarolinaGirl5]

@asker lying to us won't solve your problems hun. Ur not getting married

[KrakenAttackin]

Because these women had every opportunity not to be single but they wasted their youth, purity, and beauty.

Like lottery winners who piss away their money, people have contempt for wasteful people.

[PeachyPie93]

Okay and what about people who were with someone their whole 20's but you both grew up and changed and wanted different things.. you are saying women are not allowed to break up but men are? Because only men can be 30+ and still single and there is nothing wrong or red flaggy about that lol

[KrakenAttackin]

@PeachyPie93 "Your whole 20's"? If you are marriage minded a proposal should take a fuck lot less than a decade.

[PeachyPie93]

Yeah.. but some people don't want to marry.. that doesn't mean you don't like long term relationships and not whoring around.

[KrakenAttackin]

@PeachyPie93 Men don't want to marry, and most women are whoring around. Don't dance around the truth.

[PeachyPie93]

Yeah but you can't generalize all women.. especially when you say men don't want to marry.. lol It just sometimes happens that we become single after 30, that doesn't mean we spent all that time being whores.

[KrakenAttackin]

@PeachyPie93 Fair enough, but the average college girl has twelve different sexual partners through four years of college alone. As for "becoming single", that's because women (70-90%) of the time are the ones to destroy their families simply because they get bored.

Men will sacrifice their happiness for their families. Women will sacrifice their families to pursue "happiness".

Men aren't the problem.

[PeachyPie93]

Men makeup 90% of criminals and are usually the abusers in relationships.. so men are also an issue it isn't just a female problem. You say women breakup families because they are bored.. but how many guys cheat on their partners and don't care.. even if they cheat they expect the wife to stay lol Men don't divorce because they don't want to lose their assets and kids so they just cheat instead..
Men defo are a problem too!

[Asker]

@PeachyPie93 I agree. I was with my ex since college up until my late 20s. It felt weird being single in your late 20s as a woman because of the “competition” in the dating pool. I’m lucky to have found my current man not long after though. But you’re absolutely right, not all girls are whoring around. Some just got stuck with the wrong man only to have their time wasted…

@krakenattackin that’s also true. Lots of girls spend their youth partying and what not so all the good men are already cuffed when they decide that they want to settle down. But at the same time, some girls (like me) spent their youth in a committed relationship with the wrong man who strung them along. Or some are just very unlucky in love.

[Alwayreckles93]

You know I find it interesting how come single guys in their 30s don't get crap from people. It should be the same.

[AmeerX]

What's wrong with you? Men and Women both have to take the heat. You are crazy if you think men are to blame. It's because of women like you there is a rift between men and women

[Alwayreckles93]

@AmeerX get the hell out of Here you created from hell!

[Alwayreckles93]

I never invited you into my comment so why is your ugly face here when I never invited you disgusting ugly useless trash!

[AmeerX]

Neither did I. So you get lost too. You are trash and so is your mom who raised a fool

[Alwayreckles93]

@AmeerX I agree my mom is a trash. But I disagree I am not a fool because a successful wealthy empowering woman advice me and mentor me thanks to her I am successful. Parents do not care about your success they are useless best to cut them off I invited you to do the same cut your mother of and forget about her existence and if you have a girlfriend wife whatever YOUR SPOUSE MUST COME FIRSTS BEFORE YOUR MOM!

[AmeerX]

Yeah I think you are presumptuous that everyone follows their parents and more so everyone who follows their parents is a loser.

Enjoy the money you have. It will be worth while it lasts.

For me money is a moving shade, today it's on us tomorrow it could be on someone else.

[Alwayreckles93]

@AmeerX TAKE THAT POST DOWN I HATE IT. ITS FALSE OLDER WOMAN ARE NOT BITTER. ALL YOU MADE WAS HATEFUL COMMENTS ABOUT OLDER WOMAN I DEMAND YOU TAKE IT DOWN! NOW!

[AmeerX]

Yes most older women are bitter and they have lost desire for family. Why do you keep defending them? I have had experienced enough of them to ask them out to get nonsense like, "oh I am old now," "I am a free bird, I am not getting into a relationship because relationships are not for me", "I don't think I can depend on another man". "I am happy single, no responsibilities" and some go on as to admit "oh my ex ruined 15 years, so I am going to ruin the next 15 years thinking about those past 15 years".

[Alwayreckles93]

@AmeerX Wow you are super judgmental. Millennial Men are very cruel creatures very opinioned and critical.

[AmeerX]

Lol, please stop you are making a fool of yourself with those words.

[Alwayreckles93]

@AmeerX it's the truth all millennial guys are horrible humans.

[Asker]

Honestly, yeah. I do see men catching flack for it but not as often as women. I think men only get judged when they hit their 40s, they’re usually praises for staying single on focusing on their career in their 30s.

[Alwayreckles93]

Asker with all respect I honestly do not see nothing wrong about woman staying focus on their career. I have seen a lot of cases where men cheated on their wife they wife and girlfriend give it their all on the relationship just how you describe and the husband or boyfriend whatever never appreciate his spouse so me even decided to cheat and get a much younger woman which I find it sad. I must agree with getting married on your 20's is not for everyone for some they found the one highschool sweet hearts others they find the one in their 30s like you said for you it was best in your 30s to get married. Each and every woman is different. I see nothing wrong about waiting for the correct guy that is best fit for you. Now a days woman are career successful empowered building wealth. Especially now a days with millennials guys being a momma's boy. It is no wonder our generation doc eces has gone up. This is why I always say their is nothing wrong about a woman established her career and make her own money. Now a days in the millennial generation guys so not appreciate traditional stay at home wife's I seen it happens stay at home wife's get cheated on. It's important for woman to earn a degree build a career if possible even build wealth. Guys our generation sadly do not appreciate their wife's. I've seen cases.

[Alwayreckles93]

I apologize I meant to say *men cheated not me cheated. I apologize this phone is crazy

[Asker]

I agree. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to focus on your career and there’s nothing wrong with wanting to marry young - as long as that’s what you want and you’re happy with your choice. I personally waited until I’m now 30 to get married because I don’t want to rush into marriage. I had time to build my career and so now I’m ready to be with the man of my dreams.

In this economy, becoming a stay at home wife is a privilege. Most households need two income sources to survive…

[Ironic_Method]

It's generally seen as a red flag as generally these are women who let a guy who was not committed to get them pregnant. There's a huge overlap between single mothers and poor judgement.

[Asker]

What about the girls who choose to stay single and childless? But I do agree, I’m a firm believer of marriage before having kids.

[Ironic_Method]

I think there's a lot of conservatives who view single childless women as wasting their purpose, but I think people should live how they want as long as it's not hurting anyone. If someone wants to be single with no kids, all the more power to them.

[Asker]

Yes couldn’t agree more! Better to mind your own business and live your life how you want it.

[Ladsin2]

Every culture for all of time has looked down on single childless women for the same reason they look down on broke homeless men. You didn't do your job. Men have to acquire resources. Women have to build families. Pretty simple concept.

[Asker]

Yeah I’m aware of the societal expectations but given the divorce rate these days along with the state of the economy, I can see why more men and women are choosing to remain single/child free

[Ladsin2]

Explain that thought process to me. Women don't want kids because they're going to divorce their husbands in a few years? Why not stay married to their husbands, and build a family?

[Asker]

Kids are expensive and require a lot of your time. I know I’m waiting on having kids because I’m too busy working and maintaining my relationship at the same time. So after I get married, we are planning on waiting at least 2 years before even considering getting pregnant.

In my country, most of the divorce cases happen because the husband cheated or turned abusive, oh and economic struggles also. It’s a very patriarchal country and divorces are very frowned upon here - so it’s an absolute last resort

[Ladsin2]

But you're in your 30s... Your time frame will make it far harder for you to have kids will it not?

[Asker]

I just turned 30 so I still have about 5 years, plus I can just freeze my egg lol. I’m getting married next year but we’re planning to wait until I’m 32-33 to have a baby because we want to make sure that we have the funds to raise a child

[Ladsin2]

Okay.

[Gwendoline]

I know some that aren't dingle by choice and I feel pity for them from my heart.

[Asker]

Yeah if they weren’t single by choice then I also do feel bad for them…

[Gwendoline]

I was set for becoming a nun until I met my husband. I feel sorry for any woman who isn't experiencing what I am now with my husband and child.

[Asker]

They’re definitely missing out! But I do understand that some women just want different things in life

[LiamJHayden]

Because I'm 6'2 and most of them are shorter? But if you mean see them as "less than" or "failures" I do not. That age is my primary dating pool.

[Asker]

Lol makes sense. I bet a lot of people look up to you!

[AmazonChick171]

Women in their 30s should be married or have kids by now. Why would people wait so long?

[AmeerX]

Sometimes life is not as planned as we like it to be

[Asker]

@AmeerX very well said!

It is the ideal but life happens and the pandemic also wasted a lot of our time/finances. I’m still playing catch up

[AmeerX]

Oh you don't need to worry about finances. Just get married, your husband will take case of those.
Pandemic sure delayed a lot of things. I was 26 when it started and now I am 31. Not my fault I got out of university and all I saw was layoffs and nonsense

[Anonymous]

It's just that "type of man". Use it as a clear way of seeing the type of people to avoid. Who wants them?

[Asker]

What is that “type of man”? Do you mean the “nice guys”?

[Opinion Owner]

Nice guys don't really cluster. But people with issues tend to online especially on sites like gag. It makes it easier to block haters.

[Radiate143]

People are always looking to blame women for anything

[Asker]

Sadly that is the truth for some people…

[paledreams]

I'm a 30 single man left over 😅☺️ I'm a party animal 🥳🎉 I'll be fine

[Asker]

Love the attitude!

[paledreams]

After all what else is there to do yet to keep on enjoying 😁 after all, modern life

[paledreams]

There's not too much to complain about - on the daily

[paledreams]

Sure it sucks not having had a "banging good 20s" with the opposite gender yet ah well ❤️‍🩹 I'll be fine

[paledreams]

Anyways ladies ♀️ stay classy 😉

[Asker]

Your 30s is when the actual party starts! Enjoy it and have fun

[Alwayreckles93]

Well maybe because you millennials men are men child mommy little boy 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡 Men your age had told me they're mom and siblings will always be first before me. Sick! You men ask the lady out yet you don't want to spend 💯% of your time with her. You wasted her time. Sick oh look at me single men. Disgusting.

[Alex-Snow]

There is no reason for that. People should not be that judgmental

[Asker]

Couldn’t agree more! Sadly we live in a judgmental society

[Anonymous]

If your ego is that fragile that you marry just anyone because of of some alleged societal standard then you kind of DESERVE whatever befalls you. Grow a she-sack.😆

[Asker]

Couldn’t agree more! I see both men and women who marry whoever they’re currently with just to fit in with society’s expectations… No wonder they’re unhappy and end up divorcing or cheating down the line.

I would rather wait longer than marrying young with someone who’s wrong for me just so that I could play house

[genericname85]

do you understand the function of "shaming" in a culture?

[Asker]

I come from a culture where shaming is considered as a love language. If you gained weight then they’ll shame/bully you “out of care” until you lose weight lol

[genericname85]

Well that is the function of shaming. Not everyone is aware of it. We have a cultural understanding of best practices for life. Shaming is the mechanism that's supposed to remind people that they're deviating from what's best practice. It's a very valuable cultural mechanism and in the west, were currently destroying it

[Asker]

That’s true actually

[genericname85]

Yeah I know :D that's why I said it. And children are important for society. So to have healthy children before 30 is best practice for women. So if you're after 30 with no kids, people will remind you that this isn't best practice for society.

[Asker]

But my country is already over populated though lol It’s very common to have 3+ kids so I don’t see a reason why people who choose to be childless are pressured to have kids and contribute even more to the over crowding

[genericname85]

no species naturally regulates itself on this planet. in biology there's always some sort of external equilibrium. if there's not enough food, water an shelter, a species will die off to the point where there is enough food water and shelter for whatever number of animals are left again. humans have proven not to be any smarter than that. so yeah.

[Tomisworthless]

Its not difficult to be in relationship if you're a woman, so to be in that situation she must have some serious character flaws

[Asker]

I beg to differ. It’s easy to get laid at any age as a woman but getting into a committed relationships are much harder…

[jahaims]

If you aren't mature enough for a healthy relationship by 30 then you are a failure.

[Asker]

Tbh I agree. By 30 you should at least know what you want in a relationship and you’re open to communicate your feelings, none of those passive-aggressive bs. But what if you want to stay single by choice?

[Anonymous]

I don’t think they do. Especially career women.

[Asker]

Do you think it has anything to do with where you live/culture? Where I live women are shamed for being unmarried in their late 20s 😅

[Anonymous]

Because the chances of you having a family and marriage in your 30's drastically decrease. Because men your age do not want women your age.

[Asker]

From a biological stand point it makes a lot of sense. I’m getting married soon and I’m already worried about my biological clock lol

[Anonymous]

We don’t look down on single women in their 30s - we just look at them normally now that they’re no longer in their 20s

[Asker]

How would you look at a woman who looks like she’s in her 20s when she’s actually in her 30s though (which likely means she already has her shit together and is more emotionally mature)?

[Opinion Owner]

That’s a good point. I can’t tell just by glancing at someone that they’ve got everything together and that they’re emotionally mature. I would assume she’s in her 20s and look slightly upward.

[Asker]

Makes sense. I gotta admit though, sometimes after I find out her true age I do question why she’s still single at her age…

[Opinion Owner]

It’s pretty common nowadays though.

[Penelope79]

I think it’s cause they’re miserable. They are dreaming of single life.

[Asker]

Some seem genuinely happy. I guess people can’t fathom how a single and child-less lady could be happy. I personally wouldn’t be happy if I was still single in my 30s

[Anonymous]

I don't, but I guess some people think they are too old to get married.

[Asker]

If they want children then yeah I agree but if not then there’s no deadline

[Opinion Owner]

I agree.

[slatyb]

Because they are not controlled by a man.

[Asker]

I can see where you’re coming from but the thing is other women are also “attacking” these single/childless ladies.

[slatyb]

Yeah, that sucks too. Maybe they are angry that other women are happy while they are not.

[Asker]

Makes sense. Haters gonna hate right haha

[Kingofkings1992]

Because people are assholes.

[Asker]

Nothing but facts lol

[Anonymous]

The pressure to have a family already

[Asker]

Makes sense

[In_Trance]

They don't

[Asker]

Not all of them

[AaronDane]

Stupidity

[Asker]

Valid lol

[dudeinohio]

Nope never looked down on single women of any age.