Do you believe in marriage?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

Yes or no, and why?

I was discussing this topic at lunch with a friend today. She doesn't believe in marriage and no matter what doesn't want to get married.

I argued about the legal and economic ramifications and she said that's precisely why she doesn't like the concept. Honestly I believe in marriage when done well, although admittedly both my sister and I were encouraged to get married to our spouses ASAP or we wouldn't be getting our inheritances, and other benefits from our family. This is something I don't agree much on, and I won't pressure my children to get married to get their inheritances.

[Lliam]

Yes. Marriage signifies total commitment. It's a solemn vow; a pledge of honor made publicly.

But a person has to want to get married.

I had steady, long-term, monogamous relationships from the time I was 16 but wasn't ready to get married and didn't want kids. It wasn't until my early 30s that I started thinking of finding a life partner and settling down.
After a couple more relationships, I met my future wife. After a year long relationship with her, I decided that I could trust her completely and could see myself spending the rest of my life with her. I proposed and we got married a year later.

I was very careful about choosing who to marry because I considered marriage to be the most important decision I would ever make; once in a lifetime. And I didn't want to make a bad decision and be miserable for the rest of my life.

We've been happily married now for going on 29 years, had LOTS of fun, and built a wonderful life together.
We share the view that marriage is a lifetime commitment "for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."

We are partners in life, best friends and lovers. We take care of each other and want each other to be happy and fulfilled. We're a team working toward the same goals. And we honor the institution of marriage. We made that commitment to each other, so we work to keep our marriage happy and healthy.

[Summeroflove]

I do believe in it if it’s done for the right reasons as well as the right people unfortunately some people lack the self control to stay loyal even if they genuinely love the person. Others get married for the wrong reasons and end up miserable later on.

Marriages based on superficial and materialistic value never tend to last. They aren’t built on genuine love, respect, and a genuine connection. I’m not saying they can’t work if people fall genuinely in love but it’s hard. Many times they lead to cheating as well as eventually someone gets dumped for someone else. It’s just a matter of who discards who first.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Marriage for heterosexual women has, for generations, been a matter of security and stability as much as romance. It’s only within the last 3 generations or so that’s changed and women now carry the same legal rights and social standing as men (depending on the scenario). Marriage as a form of finding socially acceptable, legal stability no longer exists though it is still a legal agreement. For most of the heteronormative society as it is now, marriage is an agreement of commitment and a gesture of romantic love, arguably the grandest and most powerful.


For the queer society, it’s a sign of finally being able to express love in all the ways they want/need to for their partners when the generations that came before couldn’t. It’s as much a victory as it is a gesture of love and a legal safety net should something become of their partners unexpectedly. In this aspect, I believe in marriage.

[Kelley1]

I believe in marriage for me. I will not object to the choices of others, except that if young women wish to get married, they should marry as early as possible and, in any event, before age 25 and while their sexual market value is high.

[OlderAndWiser]

Marriages do not fail because something is wrong with marriage. Marriages fail because the spouses fail each other. However, it is easier for people in a failed marriage to blame the institution of marriage than it is for them to take responsibility for their failures.


People who don’t “believe” in marriage should not get married, but their decisions are right only for themselves. I have been in a failed marriage but i remarried and i am extremely satisfied now.

[Finchie40]

I use to but not so much anymore

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Religious marriage?

Disbelief and distrust here. That's the type of marriage I find the most repelling because it implies a forced, limitless bond. I believe no one can and should honor a lifetime promise, I find that psychologically harmful, and as a consequence, morally wrong. It reflects my main criticism of religion, as religion tends to care more for rules than people's well-being.

Civil marriage?

It's a bit better, yet symbolically, I'm still not thrilled by the concept. At least, this one does take into account freedom to cancel the bond, if the bond isn't fitting for people anymore. I'm still not thrilled because I view it as an external frame, invasive and it lures people into believing in a sort of necessary forever: Something that I find deeply unromantic. However, despite my distrust for the symbol, I believe that civil marriage can serve my plans, to solve administrative issues.

[NoDecision]

@Maybe_Maybe_not Read what I said about religious marriages above. Marriage is a religious ceremony. If you don't believe in religion then get your own way of joining yourself with a woman or man. That is why people all live together without it. They make a mockery out of the marriage institution. And that is one of the reasons that their marriages don't last.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Haha fine, here I am defending the option to go for civil marriage then. People should be able to appropriate, and while we're at it, mock, intentionally, any institution as much as they want, as well as appropriate any value held by some religion. What is sacred is only sacred for those who believe, for all the others, nothing has to be holy. This is compartmentalized, socially, for a reason, otherwise it's called a theocratic society.

Civil marriage is not intrinsically made to last anyway, it is breakable, by design.

[NoDecision]

That is like non-religious people celebrating Christmas and Easter. They pick and choose what parts they want to believe.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Exactly, we have always picked and chose ideas from prior frameworks.

We love remixes, we shift the landscape since forever, concretely and figuratively: Catholicism appropriated some parts of Judaism, picking and choosing what it wanted, Orthodoxy did the same and then Protestantism did the same etc. Judaism appropriated parts of Canaanite culture, Canaanite inherited from Mesopotamia, Ancient Egypt and so on until we hit a wall. Because there is no more avenue to pursue, no writing and remnants left to contemplate the definitive scale of our religious history.

[EzraIsShy76028]

On a literal level, which I tend to be on, it's just a piece of paper and you can love each other to the ends of the earth without being married.

Then again, a lot of things mean nothing if you take them too literally. Money is also a piece of paper, yet you can't survive without it in the modern world. Without money you end up homeless and alone on the streets, and eventually dead.

So for a lot of people marriage is the ultimate tangible demonstration of love.

So I believe in marriage and sort of don't at the same time. Though I'm leaning towards yes as for a lot of people marriage is one of the best days of their lives, and so I like to see them so happy. ^_^

[NoDecision]

Marriage is not for everyone. If you like having sex with a lot of different people, then it's not for you. Also, marriage was instituted by God, not man. So, if you don't believe in God, why follow His institutions. Just live together.

[lyrem04]

Preach !

[NoDecision]

@lyrem04 If you don't like it do it your way and wind up divorced in 5 years or less, providing you ever get married. You will probably be one of those that shacks up and has 4 illegitimate children.🙄

[lyrem04]

Girl why are you so hateful? “preach!” This is an expression people say, it’s like saying “Yes! You’re speaking truth”, I was agreeing with you! And even if I didn’t agree your reply is way out of line and uncalled for.

[NoDecision]

@lyrem04 Crap! I thought you were being derogative. 😕 My apologies.

[lyrem04]

@NoDecision Oh okay gotcha! No worries :)

[RavVid]

It just isn't viable anymore with the divorce rate. Pure and simple it is a stupid thing to do for a man. Would I go to a casino and put half of what I have on a single roll of the roulette wheel.

No.

But that is what I do if I marry. So I'm not.

[Nikki1989]

Absolutely 1000%. Almost 14 years married, and our marriage has been rock-solid since day one.

The sad reality is some people are just NOT marriage material, but they never see it.

[alano_]

But what about becoming limited to one person?

[LauraJ00]

I believe that marriage only works between people who understand that the marriage will require sacrifice, forgiveness, selflessness and patience. Putting the other person’s needs above one’s own.

[EmmaMary]

Absolutely... And fortunately it works extremely well for the both of us, just as we knew and felt it would.

[LazerBean]

I agree with you. Marriage is a wonderful thing. Just because unworthy people give it a bad name does not make marriage itself bad.

[Miristheiss]

Yes, but I don't think there are very many people left on the earth worthy of it.

[Cormac995]

By bond ceremony and promise yes by law no. I refuse to sign my hand to paper I want the government to stay the fuck out of my love life.

[Nikolakoala5]

Yes I believe not because of religion as im an atheist but I've also been divorced but I still believe that me and my current s. o will get married and will hopefully stay that way

[PeachyPie93]

I do.. but I'm also not in a rush to jump into one..

[Sluttt]

Marriage is for poor countries where they need to produce baby for labor. Developed country people are free to marry. They marry only for fairy tale happy ending which is just dumb childish dream.

[red-lipstick-girl]

AI don't have faith anymore because I was cheated on and abandoned by my boyfriends I don't have any faith anymore

[DrPepper12]

Marriage is good & necessary framework. It's monogamous marriage & the limitations of only two people that is the problem.

[OneViewpoint]

Agreed.

[jahaims]

Its not a matter of belief. Marriage factually exists.

[Sal_Monella]

I believe in a 12-18 month test/training period where you introduce issues to gauge her response. Like Army Ranger training. Being married can last 70 years. You should know what you to expect.

[Justneedtokno]

I still believe in marriage now, actually sitting and thinking of it for myself. It’s hard to think of.

[Sugar100]

No guy ever asked to marry me or be his girl ☹️ so no marriage is not in my destiny

[exitseven]

Yes, it is more tha two people shacking up. It is a partnership and a basic unit of a family/

[Anonymous]

When I was younger I believed in marriage, but not today marriage is no longer something that is has much attraction given the way men are treated by society and the law.

[jamesgoldman]

Amount of wedding bands I buy, I'm leaning towards no

[chocolatetwopointo]

no, bc there's no benefits and just a waste of money and time.

[MrChinaski]

Life is hard. But compared to what? I don't care whether you marry, but my advice is your life will be better if you commit to at least one person.

[chocolatetwopointo]

lmao ok give me a few reasons then

[MrChinaski]

Life long companionship. You need more reasons?

[chocolatetwopointo]

and i need that because? do u like not have any friends or?💀

[chocolatetwopointo]

i said a few, and a pet could also be a life long companionship, not as much drama as a man

[MrChinaski]

You don't need it. You need to want it.

[chocolatetwopointo]

exactly, thats why i dont want it bc i alr have it.

[Professor-college]

I believe that if I am lucky enough to find a good woman who actually loves me back as much as I love her then I would consider it

[JasonOrlove]

Marriage is costly, wedding cost, government intervention and not only that... divorce is also costly

[Godihateyou]

I've been married for 20 years. Fuck no. Stupidest thing i ever did.

[robocop666]

70% of the divorce don't do it. This is a bad statistic.

[serious]

The answer is No.

[NicholasRedone]

@Sun_Kim-Ai hmm, sure, why not 🚫

[MrChinaski]

It exists, right?

[Chayce]

not legally on paper

[Blueeyes81]

Not so much anymore.

[Jeff51]

Yes and the church

[linguistrosey]

Yes, because I'm religious

[Panthero80]

Absolutely, if it is to the right person.

[Skyros]

God believes in it, why shouldn’t I?

[Adrian2025]

If I find the right person, of course

[tylrswftversion]

yes ofc

[Anonymous]

If your looking to build a foundation

[beenherebefore]

Yes, I do.

[Babebytheshore85]

Yes why not?

[loveyouoak]

Definitely no.

[BDRick]

Lzzy Hape doesn’t

[Anonymous]

Yes I do.