Am I better of dead cause I have aspergers?

Question

i feel better of dead because i have it. i am 19 and have never even kissed a girl. all the people in my support group and all the people i meet with it that are over 25 haven't kissed a girl. am i better of dead because i have aspergers

Willow4 · Accepted Answer

No, God no :( I think having your condition at the age you're at must be tough sometimes. I can't relate to how you're feeling because I don't have aspergers but I know somebody who does. I'm sure you feel very isolated and out of touch with people around you, what they're doing and where they're going and you feel very much... stuck. In yourself. The good thing about it is you're a strong person, you automatically have to deal with things and overcome issues that other people don't have to. You battle yourself a lot and sometimes have to look inward and try to deal with things you find hard and I admire than about you. I'm sure a lot of people do.

There are a lot of people, on this site aswell, who have just the same level of inexperience as you for all sorts of different reasons. In many ways we all feel completely off the social spectrum where the opposite (or same) sex is concerned. We all feel shy, insecure, detached and nervous and there's no label for that, it's just human nature. So please don't feel bad or that you're the only one who feels isolated sometimes. You're just struggling to find somebody to understand you and a lot of dating is opening up, communicating and understanding. 19 isn't that old to have not kissed anyone, I didn't kiss anyone till I was 20 :)

I know you might feel this is an unfair and discriminatory suggestion but do you know anybody else to suffers with aspergers or know ways you could meet them? Because I think being able to be around a girl who shares your specific fears and limitations would be great for you, it would make you feel more relaxed and comfortable and that's where the kisses will come in lol :)

I wish you all the best and don't give up! We're all fighting out inner battles with dating :)

fleur-de-lys · Accepted Answer

I'm sure your parents love you and want you to be around. My daughter has major learning difficulties and is addicted to weed, but I love her so much, i would never want to loose her, even if she has a bad temper and can be hard to deal with at times. You have a place in this world, and you should never doubt that. I believe in God & that gives me hope & purpose in life, even in the worse times, and I've had a lot of them, particularly this last year has been the pits for me, worse time in 13 years.

HeatherJaney · Accepted Answer

Yeahs so should I be dead too? I'm 19 with aspergers man the fuck up.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Nope, you still can get girls, but because of the aspergers, you're probably not very intuitive socially, so instead you'll have to learn, and even approach social interactions more systematically. I would recommend pickup material for this, for the average guys it

I know one guy with aspergers, and he gets girls, but he's had to learn a lot about social dynamics and psychology, but it's still doable. Even myself, I don't think I have it, but I'm very logical and have had to learn to be more intuitive. Check out https://howtoalphamale.blogspot.com/ and read a book called the mystery method which takes on a very systematic approach to social interaction, which would probably be the best for someone with aspergers.

THE_Godfather · Accepted Answer

That's a question that you should definitely ask during one of your support group meetings. See how they handled that belief.

523206720 · Answer

With God all things are possible and you can still have a fulfilling life and maybe even remove the symptoms of your condition. If Einstein was alive today they would have diagnosed him with autism because he couldn't talk until he was 4 years old and he became a noble prize winner. Disability does not mean you cannot be successful. My pastor told us he might a blind lawyer who became very successful after graduating law school in peru while blind. Michael Jordan was cut from the team as a teenager because he was bad at throwing basketballs into the Net. In Hosea 2 the bible says that God slays people with thirst - this means that sometimes God tries to make us less superficial by removing from us the things we desire and want but this condition is not permanent.

Camifunkyballet · Answer

Dude dont make me come over there and kiss the hell out of you bro dont die on me just because you have a disease doesn't mean you have to die, i have a physical disease that prevents me from doing certain things even running sometimes but that doesn't effect me i can do backflips i will still keep on doing them until i get old or break my back because I'm a cheerleader and i live up to it some disease won't get in my way of doing the things i enjoy and it shouldn't for you either. Dont bring pity onto yourself for it will only make you sadder and more depressed learn to cope and live with it. You'll make it through just like i did

Anonymous · Answer

I have aspergers. Had physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, you name it. I've had a rough life. I'm getting better though and I'm moving foward. My disorder is a bit unrecognizable after all the help I've been getting. (At first glance you wouldn't think I have it but beneath it all... yeah ) And believe me, I've gotten A LOT of it like I mentioned. Like before pre-school throught elementary school. But I know a disorder is different for everybody. I have the same fear you do believe me. ...

I also have bipolar to deal with. I take 4 pills a day. Cool right? That and I've lived with an abusive family for years, accompanied with past harassment from peers. As you grow and get used to your surroundings... you will fit. And I believe I will 2. I'm in the process of it. I'm 17. We are so young.

Stacyzee · Answer

We have all difficult obstacles we have to face or overcome.
We all have our own story.
No one deserves to die over a plate they are given in a life.
Continue to live, and continue to overcome.
You will get through it and eventually meet someone who understands what you have and
can deal with it.

greendot641 · Answer

You are not better dead! It is not a competition. If you haven't found a good one, then why waste that moment? I'm 21 and haven't so I don't think it's a problem. No, I don't have aspergers. Just live life and don't worry about it. You're great. That doesn't define your self worth.

ReneeArsenault · Answer

No. If you're dead you still won't be able to find your first kiss. From my experience; high school sucked for finding someone, and after high school we're kind of stuck in this non-social gap because 1) high school is over so not much human interaction and 2) it's summer so work and relaxing are more on my top priority. In my opinion, anyone will find love, it sometimes takes a while because you need to go and actually look, I mean more than sitting at home on the computer. My cousin is 27 and also has Aspergers syndrome. He's had at least 5 serious relationships and right now he's engaged. He was also in a hard time and tried killing himself, but has come so far from it I wouldn't even suspect it now. Maybe go out to a club or something, not with the idea to get someone, but to build your self confidence or at least feel more comfortable around girls. I hope you you feel better, I really do care and hope I helped a little

cbear66 · Answer

Not at all! Your time will come, don't let the fact that you have aspergers hold you back! If I could I'd come through the screen and kiss you right now! You just haven't met the right girl yet. Things will be okay, don't worry.

DreamHope · Answer

Don't let it get you down! I'm sure that, if you get out there and socialise more, one day you'll find a girl who loves you for who you are, regardless of the Asperger's :)

Annymous8 · Answer

No one is better off dead even if they feel that way.

BrunetteNYC · Answer

What a horrible thing to ask! I think that you might think about therapy now.

Anonymous · Answer

a lot of people who have asperger syndrom feel that way, they get bullied and have issues communicating with people, but no one is better off dead it doesn't work that way. Life is tough you just have to know how to get trought it.

Anonymous · Answer

I suspect that I have it, and yes I'd rather be dead. Everything a woman is attracted to is what someone with Aspergers isn't.

Anonymous · Answer

Try a different toilet paper or just wipe more often

Anonymous · Answer

I agree with the comment below

Anonymous · Answer

i hate life for being the way it is

Am I better of dead cause I have aspergers?

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