What makes some more acceptable than others, and why do some people feel they have the right to comment on another’s decision?
Some examples of seemingly acceptable cosmetic procedures: correcting a lazy eye, removing a benign mole, lasering birthmarks, jaw corrective surgery for a minor over/under bite or cosmetic dentistry like veneers or whitening
Some examples of seemingly unacceptable cosmetic procedures: breast enlargements, liposuction, lip and brow fillers, Botox, penile enlargements, rhinoplasties and facelifts *As a disclaimer I’ve been pretty judgmental myself on some of these procedures - which is why I’m interested in WHY we feel it’s ok to say something negative about some of these, but support others
Why are people so judgmental or overly opinionated on some cosmetic surgeries, but not others?
the lists you've made answer the question on their own. 1st list: surgeries required to improve health of the patient. If there are side-effects, they will be irrelevant compared to the positive health improvement or compared to removal of potential future risk (e. g. mole) 2nd list: surgeries that only need to enhance physical appearance. There will be no health improvement to balance the side-effects of the surgery, the deformity created in time, the scars of the surgeries.
Small boobs never hurt anyone and is not health threatening in any way, but a mole can turn into a problem if it's one of those "bad" ones. Lips being too thin will not mean the girl cannot eat, drink, speak, suck a nice penis, but breast reduction might be required as big breasts deform the spine and provide back problems.
Plus these cosmetic surgeries are not foolproof and no surgeon can provide 100% certainty that the change will actually turn out as the customer wants it. By the contrary, after getting the first one people seem to want a retouch to bring it more over here, make it thicker over there, move that a bit more to the left. Which in turn makes them monsters over time. Breast implants need to be changed every 10 years. So if a girl gets implants at 20, by the time she turns 50, she will have at least 4 surgeries where she needs to go into a full anesthesia with risks of it's own. Then not to mention the hideous scars left on the breast, that can of course be improved with... yes... cosmetic treatments.
So when the change is not dictated by a health situation which impedes the normal body function, when the outcome is in most cases not what it was supposed to be, then I will look down at the surgeries made only because the patient think he/she will look better.
At the point science and medicine will evolve so much that patients will actually become more beautiful, without risks, ugly scars and deformities, then I will approve at everyone getting them as they please. Until then no.
in the end anyone can do as they please as long as they are willing to take the risks associated with the procedure and the possibility that the outcome might not be the answer to their fragile self-confidence. I'm not judgmental as in "she got surgery, she is a tramp, what a low life scum", but I will certainly compare the "new" her with the way she looked before. This is what doctors do anyway with "before" and "after" photos. So why can't I do the same? She walks around with a lump on her right cheek... what now? am i supposed to pretend I don't see it?
The current progress made in this field of physical enhancement surgery is not enough. Feels to me that patients are still "subjects".
Veneers and teeth whitening are for health benefits? Come on now 😉. I’ve deliberately chosen procedures that are done cosmetically, for all of those things the majority of the time it’s done to positively alter the appearance. Using the “it’s for health reasons” comes across as a cop out instead of looking deeper as to the reasons why you find them acceptable but not others.
yes correcting teeth is for health issue as well as jaw misalignment. Do you look at people talking and when you see their teeth, you notice the ones in front are seriously smaller than the rest? Well that's because jaw is not closing correctly and they grind against each other. So you either do something (as prescribed by doctor: surgery or braces) or you will have no teeth by 50. And as mentioned in my previous comment is: patients take too many risks just to enhance something they believe it's wrong which in the end there is a big possibility it will look like shit. Teeth whitening, besides whitening teeth and a temporary sensitivity, does not alter your physical appearance in a negative way. teeth whitening can only “whiten” to the natural colour of your own enamel. For example I took a medicine and it stained my teeth, so I had to whiten them to get them back to how they were. Sure it wasn’t a health threat, but it wasn’t me either, it wasn’t how my teeth were naturally made.
Veneers: I see them useful, if meant to rebuild seriously deteriorated teeth. How I see it: teeth whitening (positives vs negatives) & facelifting (positives vs negatives). And I’m sure many others do so. If you want to use teeth whitening as finger pointing target so you can excuse your face deforming surgery or breast implants, go ahead. “but people get teeth whitened, so I will get a breast implant which means I need to go under general anesthesia, have a scar on my boob and then have sensitivity which means nobody will be able to touch them” "for all of those things the majority of the time it’s done to positively alter the appearance" - the person doing this to herself might think so. If you are advocate for useless surgeries, have as many as you wish, what can I say. Assume the risks - as already mentioned, in the end nobody will "own" your body. I will see a monster walking down the street I will only ask myself “Why though?” then walk away.
I’m not using it as a scapegoat, I’m pointing out that there are things that are PURELY cosmetic, yet people feel the need to excuse them as medically necessary in order for it to be acceptable. You’re using teeth whitening as an example where it can’t “negatively” impact an appearance - yet there are other cosmetic procedures that when done well also enhance ones appearance. So why the judgement against those when you clearly are ok to have cosmetic procedures that fit within your parameters?
As to the getting personal, and assuming my position and choices on cosmetic surgery you’re 100% off. I haven’t given my position at all on cosmetic surgery - simply trying to get people to answer the question why they are ok with some being done purely for cosmetic purposes, but call others “deformed” and “monstrous” when they can be done equally as well to improve how someone looks and feels
People's reactions are often lead by the result. If the result looks nice and natural, they're fine with it. If it looks fake and out of place, then they won't like it.
Because all your caring about is for sexual reasons and not something that may benefit your health. Doing something to destroy your health because most of the times you don't like the way how you look. That is very unhealthy and it's been shown that there's a lot of mental illness that comes with that. It was not about people being judgmental you would know if that's the case. People care about what people do that will affect how others will be influenced by it. Is no different from a person who's a drunk or alcoholic but likes to drink excessively and that person who never drink in their lives thinking it's okay to do that. For an example what does having breast enlargement have anything to do with your health? Why because a guy ain't looking at you because you don't have what he wants to lust after? so what. Why you Botox? Or so called penis enlargement?
People who have these kind of issues often have problems with themselves that needs to be resolved with a professional counselor and not be altered from cosmetic surgery. If that person can love themselves for who they are then they have an issue. A lot of people don't want to deal with that on the person who they feel is being fake. Nine of the ten times they trying to please somebody did not happy with themselves. And say it's in the name of boosting confidence. That to me that is fake confidence. Because a person who has real confidence wouldn't give a crap what somebody thinks about them physically. They would find somebody who appreciate them. there is a difference of a need vs. a want. And people who gets these done needs to accept that there's not going to be a lot of people who likes those things. And will never be attracted to that. It's negative because it causes a lot of mental and psychological health issues that affects relationships in the quality of relationships.
There are plenty of incidences especially for women who are mothers of daughters, who literally save up money to allow their daughters to get their first cosmetic surgery by 18. Now those daughters don't think to use their heads and try to be like their mothers they're going to do the exact same thing like that Mom. And often one in a while that mother is single always hopping from one guy to another what if it's a relationship supposedly or not. Because they trying to live it up and get a man because they have a hard time trying to find somebody who loves them naturally as they are. What they don't understand that men will fool around with that for a while and then find somebody who's the real deal. Don't agree with it either way but that's how it goes in this world.
Cosmetic surgery offers nothing but change to physical appearance based on societal standards that change.
Otherwise it won't be and shouldn't be categorised under cosmetic surgery.
Societal standards are always changing, meaning that next few years yellow teeth might be a thing or jagged teeth. In some countries and tribes that's the beauty standard for teeth.
How many times will one change because of what the current society thinks is ideal?
I do not agree with such procedures. - They come with risks like all surgeries. - They are life threatening to some humans. - They are costly. - The trends are constantly changing what to look like, so in short no one can ever keep up with it. - The marketing is based on creating self doubt and low confidence to sell products to make consumer happy then come back again.
Well the stuff that seem to be more easily accepted are the ones that fix an 'actual' problem, something that would seem visually unappealing to the person and society. The other category although to the person might be a problem (thinking their boobs are too small or nose is too big) appear to be caused by vanity, and are not surgeries that the person really needs. The sooner society can accept and respect that each person has the right to make their own choices about their own bodies without being judged for it, the better of a world we'll be living in.
I'm unsure why people have issues with such things. I've recently had a breast enlargement and it's boosted my self confidence and I feel so much better in my own skin. I personally do not think going up two cup sizes makes me a narcissist! I wouldn't ever judge someone who has had plastic surgery as you do not know their reasons for it. Maybe they got bullied, maybe that's something they've always been insecure about.
You know, it's definitely something that I'm way more open about as I get older, but I still find myself torn on the subject. Like it would make me sad if I found that my daughters grew up hating their nose or what not. I mean, is cutting it up really the answer? I don't know. If they chose to do it, I'd like to think that I would support them, but I'd worry that there's a self-image problem that ultimately would not be solved even if their nose was corrected.
That said, I get highly annoyed when people criticize women who wear makeup. It's almost as if beauty is invalidated if you aren't born with it to me, that's pretty bullshit. I suppose in that case, no one should go to the gym or work hard in school either because those things would mask their natural fatness and stupidity. Is this the same as criticizing cosmetic surgeries? I don't know, but it sort of feels hypocritical for me to support one and not the other. In the end, if someone is doing something so that they can smile bigger every time they look in the mirror, I have a hard time imagining a good reason why we shouldn't support it.
I think there are a variety of reasons depending on the person.
It seems to be more acceptable if someone wants to utilize cosmetic procedures to go from ugly to average, but then it's more likely to be considered vain if someone wants to go from average to hot.
Slightly noving/removing minor things is viewed as more acceptable then adding foreign substances to give you new features that completely change your overall look.
People who are natural can feel cheated by people who achieved their look through surgical means.
And then I think how realistic the results are also impact it.
Personally I feel kinda conflicted on this. On one hand I acknowledge that looks are extremely important, perhaps even more important than personality, so it makes sense to me that people want to do whatever they can to look better.
That being said, the idea of my girlfriend having foreign substances in her boobs or lips does feel somewhat offputting if I am thinking about it. I would almost prefer not to know. Also part of me is somewhat resentful. Like to me it feels like women by default already have a big advantage over men in sex/dating so the fact they have all these other options to fix themselves is annoying. Most of the things men are judged on can't be fixed as easily as small boobs/lip can.
Also the fact that I am natural makes me want a girl is natural. :/
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Anonymous
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Every case isn’t different. It’s important to consider context.
I’ve known women who have had breast reductions purely for the sake of looking perkier, and I’ve known women who have had breast reductions because their DD’s were causing them excruciating back pain by the time they hit their late 20’s. As a male living with both people as roommates, it wasn’t even up to me to cast judgement — the women involved were more than happy to judge each other based on circumstance. I just kicked back and watched the show.
Simarly, you mentioned penile enlargements. I e read about guys using vacuum devices or traction devices purely for their own vanity, and I’ve known guys who resorted to the same treatments in order to correct unfortunate circumstances like Peyronie’s Disease. The guys who just looked to get larger were met with little sympathy and faced great risks for mothing more than their own pride, but the guys who actually had a reason for their efforts gained more sympathy and actually had something to gain from the risks hat they took.
Context is everything. If somebody feels happier, healthier, or lives a more fulfilled life because of an operation, then more power to them. But if it serves nothing more than heir own silly vanity and comes win more risks than rewards, then it’s not on me to judge them. Rather it’s on the universe and it’s risks versus it’s rewards that will make them naturally face the consequences of their actions, and people will have little pity if such situations were entered carelessly. The human body is a delicate machine. It’s not in our place to judge another, but our own body still needs to be treated with care and respect.
Well, when it comes to male circumcision, that's generally the only reason to do so. Or the claim that "it's cleaner", as if a person has zero faith that their boy will be capable of brushing his teeth or taking consistent showers or rinsing his dick off in that shower; thus, zero faith in their parenting skills.
So, at least when it comes to baby boys having the tips of their dicks cut off, for me, it's part of their body they're cutting off, without getting consent, first. The baby boy doesn't get a say in the matter, and it will never grow back.
Though, I guess that's not exactly what you meant; that's just what came to mind, because I had a conversation on it, yesterday.
For other cosmetic procedures, I imagine it revolves more around it being unnatural. Or an idea that everyone should "accept themselves the way they are." Especially since women are taught that a lot, in the West. "You are perfect just the way you are." When it comes to purely cosmetic procedures.
I think a big part of it is also that people consider--at least where women are concerned--as helpless children who cannot make their own decisions. If they do something radical, it's always because society pressured them into doing so. So, for cosmetic procedures, people may see it as something the woman isn't doing for herself, but to please someone else or to try to chase some societal standard of beauty.
For the other "acceptable" procedures you mentioned, it seems to me like they do make more sense. They're more *necessary* to maintain homeostasis. Rather than outright changing something just for aesthetics, those procedures are in response to an issue that arose; rather than out of nowhere, for self-gratification or to please others.
What makes some more acceptable than others, and why do some people feel they have the right to comment on another’s decision?
- should people not have the right to comment on other people's decisions? They should not have the right to change them. But commenting is always good. It's an opinion.
Some examples of seemingly acceptable cosmetic procedures: correcting a lazy eye, removing a benign mole, lasering birthmarks, jaw corrective surgery for a minor over/under bite or cosmetic dentistry like veneers or whitening
- yea. While everyone should -in my opinion- be happy with what they look like, i get hiw some people might want to change some out-of-the-ordinary trademarks. It helps tremendously in most careers or partnerships
Some examples of seemingly unacceptable cosmetic procedures: breast enlargements, liposuction, lip and brow fillers, Botox, penile enlargements, rhinoplasties and facelifts
-those are almost the same to me. I do not agree, but i am not in a position to judge that, because i don't know what it's like. Some people have low self-esteem, and in some cases a surgery might help overcome their lack of confidence. Not always though, because -as we all know- many people don't seem to have a limit in how they change themselves. I think you should always hold on to your core looks. But that is just my opinion.
If surgery looks NATURAL & good there’s little to no reason to judge negatively but: 1. If you have retarded looking surgery that’s on you for going with a quack/cheap doctor and not doing your homework. You don’t deserve a pat on the back or a medal. 2. If you are addicted to getting surgeries that’s on you too. Just like meth addicts. No medal. 3. I would not want to have kids with someone obsessed with facial surgeries because I think she hates her natural look so much that she would give the kids hang ups about their own looks or pressure them into surgery.
also, don’t forget... the problem with GOOD cosmetic surgery is... no one notices it. therefore, people often become unfairly biased against procedures whose ••best•• results they’re unknowingly admiring on the daily.
If you see a woman over 35 with decent-sized boobs that are still possessed of “perk” and don’t have noticeable sag to them, then, you’re looking at a woman who’s had GOOD breast augmentation. End of. In some demographics, this is just about ••every•• woman over 35 with decent-sized boobs. The new normal.
The first group are minor surgeries really, you'd be hard pushed to notice it would be like, "oh that mole on your neck is gone". The second ones are usually more drastic, it seems like you've crossed a threshold for the point where you're completely changing who you are... "wow nice tits, how much were they?".
You could argue the first lot are removing "flaws" while the second lot are "enhancing what you don't have". Humans tend to like being equal to one another that's why someone bringing themselves up is fine, but surpassing you is not.
@archiz I mean the results are something fairly small though, a minor correction isn't something drastically noticable (even braces can fix that if you start them in your teens).
Well it appears to me that the former are significantly justifiable. There is an evident.. defect if you like. A lazy eye, a mole, an overbite.
The latter, appears to me, to be more superficial. Breasts of an unsatisfactory size to the individual, or same for a penis, or same for the nose, are not really a defect. Just something that they feel self conscious about.
Not to be harsh, I have defects. A couple moles on my face. Slight septum deviation (actually, if someone is having a rhinoplasty for this reason then they are having it because of an actual defect).
Anyway I don't care either way. I'm just speculating as to why people might feel the way you suggest they do about the two different groups of corrective surgery.
I wouldn't ever bother with any of these procedures myself.
However, I've known people who have, and it's usually been in the context of 'correcting' something that troubled them. I don't have a problem with that, if it indeed does boost their confidence and make them feel better about themselves.
What I don't like is when something looks obviously fake, and daft. Other people have mentioned lips in the comments, and I think that's a good example.
So I think it's what the reasons were behind the decision AND what it was that they had done, PLUS the final result that makes some acceptable, and others less so.
I would say this: you do whatever makes you happy as long as you are not harming others... both physically and emotionally.
I've never commented on anyone else deciding what they want to do with their own bodies. Same thing with gay marriage. I'm not against or for gay marriage, but as long as they aren't harming anyone else then they can do whatever they want.
Too often we care about other people too much because in some ways we are jealous of them... otherwise we wouldn't care. I've never heard of anyone being jealous of a homeless person.
I would say this though... if anyone wants to do surgeries they should really look at poor examples of it like Donnatella Versace or Micky Rourke. I just think they went too overboard. But if you can look natural and good doing it, what not? We're all going to die anyways... might as well see what the alternative is like.
However, note that I am not saying go for plastic surgery. It's also important to love yourself and accept yourself.
Like what someone else said, I think it boils down to personal preference, for myself I think everyone should be happy with who they are. We are all made with flaws and I think it is important that we except those flaws for who are. That being said, when it comes to little things like moles or boils... etc, that's fine to me, those could potentially end up being bigger problems. It terms of face lifts, boob jobs, and any other surgeries that purely asthetic those are the ones I disagree on for a few reasons. One they don't really age well, two they can lead to even bigger problems, more health related problems in the future, three there better and more natural ways to improve tbosr areas, and four, we aren't meant to be perfect. For myself surgeries along the lines of breasts enlargement and liposuction are just too unnatural and superficial for my taste.
Cosmetics a) costs cash out of pocket and b) carries risks.
People will always judge you based on what you choose to spend your disposable income on anx what you take risks on. Be honest. You prob judge the guy going 150 mph in the ferrari on the highway. doesn't mean its bad or wrong if you can responsibly afford it. But it hopefully explains it
I don’t judge someone for their belongings or disposable income, simply because it annoys me when people do it to me. I would judge him for his speed and endangering others lives but could not care less what he owns/does with his own body or money
Because the notion of someone wanting to fix something we also have as if it was a flaw that needs fixing makes us feel inadequate and makes us wonder whether our flaws need fixing too.
But because accepting our own inadequacy is difficult we instead choose to invalidate the views that make us feel that way in the first place.
Well the ones people aren’t judgmental about are ones you were born with or were done for health reasons The others however Well They are different They are done to make the person look nicer And no one likes a person who looks better then them
1) I'm pretty judgmental when it comes to this because it's a show of superbia.
2) I think some are more acceptable than others because some things have a much stronger impact. If one is made ugly by something unusual then removing it is okay. If someone has something that's not ugly or unusual and instead wants to make it look good, such as using Botox, then I'd call it a display of superbia.
I think it's more of the so called acceptable examples are things that people are wanting to correct that actually have a problem to them and is more correcting then just doing it because they aren't happy with how a certain part of their body looks. The unacceptable ones are those, plus these ones we tend to see people over do it a lot..
Stubborn belly fat can take heaps of work like eating healthy , exercise and all that tiring things.. mole and birthmarks you can't exactly work out or something to remove them
It annoys me because when i stay all natural, there are people doing tons of surgery and end up looking better than me and it feels like cheating and they don t even look like themselves. But that s a personal feeling, if I am gonna be objective I find plastic surgery wrong when it is pushed over bored as an obsession to look perfect and you loose your unique look in the end. But correcting flaws in general I am not against. Good for them
Because people think they're being fake for doing these procedures, when really they just wanna do it because they have the money for it or want to correct something. I really don't give a crap when a girl or a guy does it lmao it's their own body, what even is "natural beauty" nowadays
Everybody alters their own style/body nowadays, even guys do it too but we just don't realize that it's more common than we think
No, If She got some solid reason behind the procedure then we should support it, Like breast reduction due to medical reasons and doctors prescribe it then its okay but, If you are doing it to just look pretty then, its your body and you got every right to ruin it but you can't force people to like it. Just like you they got every right to dislike it.
I think it's because of authenticity matters, the more extreme or shallow the goal of the surgery is, the faker a person becomes, and the more negatively it is seen. But considering today's societies' expectations of beauty that are making the pressure on the people belonging to them harder and their happiness seem more conditionally achievable, then I really can't judge them.
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