How to overcome shyness?

[Anonymous]

Hello everyone. Im 21. Im really shy and how low self-esteem , even though im am considered beautiful and smart , talented. Im very insecure and criticize myself. Because of it I have no one to hang out with. I simply do not ask smb out, cuz im afraid. Waiting smb to text me , but no one does. I really want to have friends, but my shiness is an obstacle. Is there anyone who has the same problem as me?
I really would like to talk to u.

[lukalas]

Pretty sure you're a dude trolling but ok. Im shy as well you can be all those things x100 but the reality to getting a boyfriend is you need to get lucky for somebody to approach you in the street (cause guys are pussies like 90% of us including myself) either that or your girl friend introduces you to her guy friend so you hook up like that, you really do need some experience so you're way more confident and see that you can chase (subtle non creepy way) a guy you like and want (if he wants and likes you too), its more fun for you and easier for him, of course if he’s not a complete idiot and realizes that you want to try smth with him. Easy beginner thing you can do is go out, to a bar, alone or with 2 friends or alone can't be 1 you'll understand why later, and you see a guy, hold strong eye contact (playfully brake it when it gets kinda awkward) for like 5-10 min max (if he holds it he likes u 99%) just go over ask for a lighter if u smoke, if not then ask him about time or smth situational (surroundings), if he's not dumb he will ask you what you want to drink, then just sit down and talk, if he's a creep gtfo, you leave your friends for that thats why u need 2 so she's not alone, if there's 2 guys and u are with 1 friend after u sit call her over. THIS IS NOT GUARANTEED the guys still has to have some balls so he dont freak out when u approach, cause he probably never got approached, if he does freak fck him there are so many others you can do this on its so easy for the girl to do this, minimal risk you're just asking for a lighter, if he's dumb just walk back to your table and try on a different guy later or tomorrow or whenever its easy for u. Holy sh*t, i know this is long but its some high quality tips and it will work better then just waiting (i swear if ur a dude and i typed this much FCK) lol no for real tho, hope it works (it will eventually) :)

[Asker]

Thanks or ur advice, the things is I do not even have smb who I can call a friend, I do not have them and that "guy" thing is kind of too advanced level for me. Im not really brave , so even though I have a lot of things in my mind I prefer to run away.

[lukalas]

Well go out alone i mean since you dont have anyone, you and girls in general can be more brave than guys trust me i’ve seen you just have to work on it, and as for the running away you can't run forever, and the sooner you stop the better it is, and trust me when i say this IT’S WORTH IT, risking it, being outside of you comfort zone, it will get easier, dating and meeting guys/girls and people in general is all about practice, its like learning to play guitar it takes time, you will suck the first 6 months but its worth it after the sixth month (shorter for dating) NOTHING WORTH HAVING COMES EASY

[fabi1998]

I used to have the same problem and I still don't have a lot of friends. I think for me it was sort of a process in getting more comfortable around other people. At first I was mostly opening up to my family and really familiar people and eventually I started to become less shy and I could even talk with strangers.
The hardest part for me always was starting a conversation because I never got the hang of small talk. What helped me overcoming this is I learned a few conversation starters.
I did also have low self-esteem but that was due to depression and getting bullied by a few classmates.

[Asker]

Thanks for ur reply , how are u doing these days?

[fabi1998]

No problem I am doing much better nowadays. But I used to be suicidal and I had the problem just like you that nobody tried to reach out to me and I was to afraid to contact people as well. It's a really shitty sittuation but my experience is that people sadly won't make the afford to contact you. You just need to find ways to deal with your insecurities. It's probably something that might take a while but nobody is perfect and you probably need to figure out what works best for you. I'd also suggest to set yourself maybe small goals every day about something you want to change about your shiness. I did this at the begining. It can be something like making a compliment, calling somebody on the phone, inviting someone to eat pizza, asking a stranger for help (even though you dont need it) etc.

[Countrywildmangirl]

I'm just like u everything u just said in the passage is just like me feel free to PM me