How to get revenge from my rapist?

I don't have any proof of what he did to me. I want him to suffer and pay for what he did to me, I want to shove a knife up his ass and let him drink hot oil he should be castrated. I want him to rot in jail, im sorry if you're disturbed 😔 I've been imagining these things wishing he could be punished for what he did to me. I'm angry and filled with resentful still trying to cope... I wish there was something i could do but he still wants to hurt me and he's much stronger. The only thing I can do is keep far from him, he always tries to be alone with me which I always avoid since then. I want to get evidence but that means I'll have to risk myself.
How to get revenge from my rapist?
Post Opinion