Do you enjoy small talk?

[Anonymous]

And why or why not

Yes

No

[GoldenAxer]

I enjoy it mostly for a while but I see it as a transition to deeper conversations. I usually want to move to deeper ones after some small talk, like "soulful". I'm less interested in the intellectual types of conversations since I feel like I can just research and learn most of these things for myself (unless the person is an established expert in their field, at which point I'm cool with and want to pick their brain).

Meanwhile, when a person shares things with me like their childhood, hopes, and dreams, I feel like I'm learning something really special that I can't learn in any library. So I like small talk but my hope is to reach this kind of soulful talk.

[GoldenAxer]

My conversation style is also a bit sporadic and long-winded. I like starting with small talk but I can start from a conversation about the sunny weather to sharing stories of my childhood playing on the beach in the sun and getting knocked over by a miniature tsunami of a wave. I tend to pause there and hope the other person shares their childhood with me. Doesn't always work but sometimes it really works and I've made some of my best lifelong friends in random places among strangers, as well as my wife, with this communication style.

[AmandaYVR]

Soulful, eh. Interesting.

[GoldenAxer]

@AmandaYVR I should probably try to come up with a more precise term. Yet what interests me most when my desire is to feel closer to a person, and not simply pick their brains if they're an expert in a field, are questions that let me find out how they think and feel and perceive the world.

So I usually try not to ask questions much and prefer a conversation dynamic where I share something, then they share something, and we take turns without having to ask each other any questions. But an example of what I'm interested in might be like why someone chose their career, whether or not they enjoy it, what sort of hopes and dreams they have for the future with what they might accomplish, etc.

[OlderAndWiser]

sometimes small talk reveals much about a person's character without them knowing that they are making such revelations

[SimplyKayla02]

I have always really hated "small talk" or just generic conversations. Like hello how are you, have a nice day, thanks you too. Just always feels very fake to me and many people just say it because.. That's what you're supposed to say and not because they actually want to talk.

I'll do it to an extent to be polite, but I try to avoid it if I don't think any real conversation is going to come from it. I'd much rather be the weirdly quiet girl than the boring small talk girl

[AmandaYVR]

Nope. I don't mind topical talk, or sometimes light talk. But random small talk, no.
I'd always rather it be specific and deep.

[Ailaw22]

I think I have seen the statement of up for deep convo way too much on social media and dating profiles when the person is not even putting effort for the conversation to going on.
You can't befriend a random stranger or anyone without engaging in small talk at first.

[MotorcycleMan]

Not really in and of itself, but if used skillfully it can be a way to find common ground and something more interesting to talk about. It's a starter. An exploration. A safe ground to work from.

[convo_king89]

It’s a great way to kill time, but if your interested in more than just small talk how do you transition without be aggressive/creepy

[Asker]

Good question.

[convo_king89]

It depends if it’s a stranger or someone you know too.

[Asker]

True.

[MTC29]

No, I don't. If people have nothing interesting to say, thoughtful silence is fine.

[sweetmessposts]

No I am seriously awkward when it comes to small talk 💀 I do not enjoy it, and worst of all I am terrible at it too in all honesty

[DonkeyDan]

Yeah I don't mind small talk, you really get to know someone through small talk, just the intricate details of what makes the person tick.

[FatherJack]

No , bores me shitless !! More introverted by nature , introverts don't do small talk as a general rule.

[RawIronhide]

It's almost as if we're avoiding talking about real questions and issues to descuss trivial matters. I know that's not entirely rational but it still feels that way, it's an icky feeling for me lol un-genuine.

[scooogy]

I enjoy it because it makes people simple humans instead of complicated workers or business people. For example I had some small talk with a guy selling pastries, telling him how a bee attacked my lunch outside 😂

[Playa23]

I like small talk in some situations, specially if I'm bored or am not in a hurry.

[Corina_J]

I don't really like it cuz it feels fake to me. Like going through the motions for a big schmoozey buttkiss session. Or the conniving info pump for gossip n shit talk. Meh...🙄

[Wise4myage]

Sure, small talk is alright and its a good way to break the ice.

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

No! Fuck no! I suck at it. If I have nothing to say and just have to talk about whatever comes to my mind nothing ever comes out that's worth listening to.

[Asianguy123]

I try but it’s difficult. Some people are very good at it. I envy them.

[GlovewithLove]

Small talk is just appearing polite, the other person doesn't really give a shit. Hard pass!

[Anonymous]

I inevitably break in with dry humor to liven the dull factor. But I suppose it’s better than a bunch of people sitting around in silence.

[pleasestopthis]

I hate it, I try to avoid it at all cost. Makes no sense to me.

[Anonymous]

I end up asking a straightforward question that I'm actually curious about and they become shocked because I didn't ask about the weather beforehand.

[pppppkk]

well for one, i have crazy social anxiety

[pretyyygirl]

No, I prefer long meaningful conversations