Oh shit yeah my dad is a diagnosed narcissist by a Psychiatrist so definitely grew up with all that crazy.
I wonder if my brothers gaslight me though, they do this thing that drives me crazy. So whenever we have some type of argument or fight in the middle of it they always say, "Man you are always fighting with me, what's wrong with you? We literally just fought recently. You are always trying to fight with me." That makes me take a pause and think about it. Because I don't want to be like my dad, he loves fighting.
Whether it's bad or good attention he wants it like a starved animal. I think really hard about when was the last time we fought. I literally cannot think of the last time we fought. Like we probably fought last year, we never fight at least in my eyes.
I ask them when was the last time we fought? Sometimes they mention something I don't remember. I don't remember what they're talking about. Sometimes they mention something that happened months ago I'm like that happened like 6 months ago... And they say yeah 6 months is too soon we shouldn't be fighting at all. Or they don't have a reply but they furiously complain that I fought with them all the time.
I don't know why but that really messes with my head. Makes me feel like I'm a crazy person that is trying to fight with everyone, basically like my dad. Actually that makes me stop arguing with my brothers because I get all in my head and upset and I try thinking really hard trying to remember when I last fought with them. Because you know I'm not trying to be a bad person and torment them.
But I wonder if that's gaslighting or they're just letting me know I am a huge asshole. I don't really know what's the truth lol.
Another thing one of my brothers has done to me. I remember we started fighting about this one time I stayed with him over his house. I told him I didn't feel welcomed and I was starved because they didn't make me food ever and I was living on tv dinners I bought for myself.
To top it all off, my brother had the audacity to tell me to stop buying so much food to put in the fridge because they don't have space and I'm like what am I supposed to eat... you are literally not giving me food.
He told me to come over there. I went there to get away from dad because he was relentlessly fighting with me and I couldn't take it anymore so I stayed with my brother and his wife for two weeks to get away.
I was telling him months later after staying with him how he starved me and made me feel like an outsider he hated while I visited and stayed with him. I remember him saying to me "All you say and talk about is me, me, me." He made me feel like I am was self-centered and like I was doing something wrong.
When I was just telling him like hey you were mean to me while I was over there when I was supposed to be getting away from all of that. He made me feel like just because I was talking about my feelings, I was talking about it for a while because he wasn't acknowledging them or apologizing, that I was in the wrong.
I remember saying "Ok, I'm giving you the time and space to say what you want to say, since I'm talking about myself too much. You talk about yourself now." Instead of saying what he wanted to say, because he made it seem like I wasn't letting him get a word in edge wise since I'm so self-centered.
He instead started tearing me down, telling me what's wrong with me. That right there I can recognize as gaslighting but the other thing saying I'm self centered I don't know if that's gaslighting?
I'm a psychology major so I guess I learned healthy communication through class instead from my parents lol. I don't believe I am a narcissist and hopefully I didn't get anything toxic from my dad when it comes to socializing.
But I do believe my brothers have bits and pieces. Because when we fight I notice they relentlessly browbeat me and make me feel like I'm a worthless piece of trash. I know that's not normal or healthy.
my mom gaslit me and my family a lot about things she promised us or telling us that she treated us well and fairly, which wasn't true at all and we all knew it. but I mean she was out mom and someone with that kind of influence is just trustworthy to a young person.
my ex gaslit me for a long time, mostly about sex or consent that I definitely did not give him or about things he said or didn't say, just straight up lies that he'd sweeten with sincere sounding apologies or making me feel like I made it all up because he "wasn't good enough for me" ultimately he was a terrible guy and he's finally out of my life, but when you're scared to be alone it becomes easy to excuse the things others do so you won't have to go through life by yourself. "a toxic partner is better that no partner" is what id always tell myself, even though that's far from true.
I have been. Most people probably have. The only way to address it is head on. “Nope. Sorry. You won’t do that to me. That is not the topic at hand and I won’t shift the conversation to that.” Or “I never said that and won’t defend myself against an opinion I don’t have” or “That may be your reality but mine is ___ and I will be heard.” Assertive works for gaslighters.
yeah my driving teacher gaslighted me into being too dumb, when he failed to teach me. took me a long time to realized. had to change the driving school. in case you're wondering: in germany, you aren't taught to drive by your parents. that's illegal. you hire a teacher.
I’ve never gaslit anyone myself but I’ve been gaslit before yes. my husband does it a lot tbh…
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Anonymous
(18-24)
10 mo
No. At most I might use my sexuality to get what I want from my husband, kind of low key manipulation maybe. Act submissive so he does what I want. Other times I'm like he's had a hard weak or he's such a hood husband and father he deserves some good sex or a nice meal, maybe I will meet him at our door when he comes home from work like a 1950s housewife with a cocktail and in some lingerie.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
10 mo
Some people say she gaslights me, but they don't know her like I do! She helps me realize how I much I overthink things and how it usually is my fault when she cheats. She deserves better than me and I'm lucky to be with her at all, just like she says. If you're reading this baby, I'm so sorry. I know you don't like me talking about you to strangers.
Prediction of what a gaslighter want to say is very confusing for them, prediction + funny sarcasm are weapons a person who tries to gaslight me can't stand for too long. Mostly they get just angry and I put my devilish smirk on.
I have never gaslighted or been gaslighted. But i thought this type of manliputors. These evil men usually target women who are at a weaken state to take ad advantage of them
That is the problem with these monsters. They need former victims to be silent, , but like the me too or not me too (men wrongly accused of sex crime by felmale gaslighter) Should be outed
