Is it normal for my girlfriend to shower with my neighbours 4 year old son?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend babysits her neighbours 4 year old son. And when she takes a shower she brings him in there and they shower together.

I told her this is very inappropriate. Her excuse is that if she leaves him alone he’ll wreck stuff. Is this normal? I kinda feel like it’s grounds for a breakup

Yes

No

[Screenwriter]

I'm going to give this a "Maybe."

This isn't HER child. I hope she's asked the parents if this is OK. If she hasn't, she's in the wrong and needs to tell them that she's doing this.

I'll tell you my personal experience. I took baths with my son EXACTLY until he was 4 and asked where my penis was. I'd given him the terms and information that woman had vaginas and men had penises.

I told him I didn't have one and repeated that ladies had vaginas, and decided it was time to stop bathing with him. So, she'd better have asked permission.

And at age 4 is when kids start to notice these differences. The Latency Period is generally about over. So, she's treading on unsafe ground. Not her kid. And does she have permission.

In addition, why is she taking a shower while she's babysitting? She's WORKING. She can take a shower after the parents pick UP the kid. And of course an unsupervised child is "tearing up the place." This is why they hire a babysitter!

I think your girlfriend doesn't have her head screwed on straight. I hope this is NOT occurring at the parents' house! She's taking showers at an employer's home? And if she's at HER house, she's a careless babysitter. You need to ask her if she's made it clear to the parents she's bathing with their child and at her or the parents' house.

I would never clear a babysitter to use my shower or bathe with my son. My child had had his bath before I went out. All the babysitter did was change a diaper or give a bottle. Her behavior seems odd. Good luck with resolving this.

[Flower7]

I agree with everything you said from start to finish.

[sage2021]

Why would she need to take a shower while she's got a job to do by babysitting? That's totally weird and something is mentally wrong with her!! 🤪

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Some people this is totally normal. When I was a kid, maybe 7 years old my parents were like it's bath time and I'm like fuck yea, rubber ducky. But then my cousin was there and she was a year older then me and she's, I mean she's georgous. And distant enough to look almost nothing like me but close enough that I wanted nothing to do with that situation at all.

I didn't want to think about it, I didn't want to be seen thinking about it. I'm trying to tell my parents I don't want to do it and they're like

Oh cmon, you've been out all day which kinda made the thought of it even worse.

I don't know that's something you do with kids who are like... Not conscious yet lol

Anyway, I guess 4 is fine.

[Communicationisking]

Normal I don't know, grounds for a break up I don't think so. Do the parents know?

Anyways unfortunately if it was the other way around and you were the babysitter then that would be totally taboo and so yeah I think you have a valid point on thinking it is a little weird but pretty sure your girlfriend isn't doing anything sinister.

Talk to her and just tell her it weirds you out and she can just have a shower after he falls asleep if it is literally making you think you want to break up with her but you actually love her.

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the wild world of relationships and boundary-setting! 😊 Your instinct is solid here. While caregiving often requires creativity, showering together with someone else's child can be considered a red flag. It's essential to communicate openly with your girlfriend about your concerns, keeping the conversation respectful. If she doesn't understand or respect your boundaries, it might be time to reevaluate the relationship. Trust and mutual understanding are love's true foundation. 💕

[dwreborn]

I would have an issue with it my wife did with our daughter but that's different do the parents of this child know? If he's getting into stuff watch him but you don't have to be undressed with him I never was in bath or shower with my daughter I think it has to be your own kid very young and same sex to do that

[avery58]

Definitely not, I think the child's parents should know. I'm not saying she has weird intentions for sure, but at the very least it's inappropriate that a stranger is showering with their kid. I wouldn't want a stranger seeing my nephew naked nor that he is seeing them naked. That could leave a trauma for the child or make them confused. What matters most is the child's safety so it's better to take precaution.

[Flower7]

You are right, this is inappropriate. And her reasonings make no sense. No, the child should not be left alone while bathing…. most children that age are too young to take a stand-up shower to begin with. This is why parents (or babysitters) sit the child in a bath and wash them that way. Also, I see no reason for the caregiver to need to be naked along with the child.

[DryGermanGuy]

You were put in a bath as a four year old? You realize that most 12 month old children can already stand and walk, right?

[Flower7]

Yes, I took sit-down bubble baths until that age and older.

[EmmaMary]

Congratulations on winning a Troll of the day award.

You need to fucking seriously Grow Up and start acting your age. smh

[MemeSupreme]

kinda

i bathed a few kids i babysat, but i never showered with them altho i get why she did. whats important is that the parents are okay with it

idkk why you'd breakup with your girlfriend over it tho lol

[Nikki1989]

I think she needs a boyfriend who is not so insecure and batshit crazy.

[Flower7]

lol I love the picture

[AviatorTom]

It's kind of unusual for her to actually get in the shower with him, but not a big deal. Most babysitters would supervise him in the shower by sitting (clothed) outside the shower.

[aceleon]

not normal but looks like it is unavoidable if another solution is not found out.

[Anonymous]

Yes its fine. Often when looking after kids you can't even leave them on their own to go to the bathroom and you have to take them.

[Kingofkings1992]

Get the fuck out of here with this bullshit post. Seriously. No one cares about your made up story.

[Jackblue]

It is a little creepy. If she was a man I would say call the cops, in this case I don't really know what to do. Are his parents aware?

[Alex-Snow]

No he isonly 4 and kids should learn about different body parts at an early age

[Anonymous]

What does your neighbors parents think of this? Because just because it happens doesn't automatically make it anything perverse. But I do think it's something impropriate.

[DrPepper12]

If he's on the floor playing while she showers that ok

[Flower7]

He’s saying that the child gets into the shower naked with her, not that the child just plays in the bathroom while the babysitter is showering.

[Staximus]

Why can't she just take a shower before or after the kid is gone?

[Sal_Monella]

Age 4? Yes it is. I won't give you a long defense to shoot at.

[loveladies1]

I accidentally hit yes😭. No it's not normal

[Toaster100]

she shouldn't be doing it, I cannot believe the kids parents let her do that. You have to stop her from doing it.

[Beckylynn3131]

I hope you let the boys parents know. That’s sick

[beefcakebradybatson]

He isn't going to club her, but it is somewhat unseemly.

[Anonymous]

That’s not her child if a man did this to someone else’s kid he’d be considered creepy

[Opinion Owner]

And is she using her own shower?

[DryGermanGuy]

Dayum! Is she related to Joe Biden? 😱

[strateguy632]

Same as a man, call family services.

[DishLady]

No. I presume this is a fake story.

[loveyouoak]

No. What does the child's mother say about this?

[FunkyMonkee]

I'm sure she'll be perfectly safe.

[Kelly6]

@Toaster100 Its notmal

[Anonymous]

I don't think so.

[exitseven]

that is bizzarre

[dustybiker2]

So don't shower...

[seeyounexttuesday]

Fake and gay