Questions

Have you got your Holiday/PTO/Annual Leave/Day Off/Sick Off/Sick Leave/ Parental Leave/ Maternal Leave booked for the release day?

My body is ready

I was always so career-oriented, ever since I was a child. I always imagined being more successful in my career life by now, seeing that I just recently turned 32.

I have been told by numerous teachers (and even a college faculty member) that I am an exceptional writer. I worked as an Advanced EMT for several years, gaining experience and knowledge in both the healthcare and public safety lines of work. From there, I explored an entirely different line of work: software development. I taught myself a vast amount of languages, libraries, frameworks, tools, and other technologies. Sadly, a combination of different factors just completely derailed me: struggles with severe mental illesss over a decade, a stalking and harassment conviction with collateral damages, and advancements in AI causing me to rethink my career paths entirely. I have held a total of 25 jobs in a span of 15 years, and I am currently working my 26th role (part time).

Now as it stands today at age 32, I am a nobody in society. I am at least very fortunate to be married to the love of my life and having a roof over my head (thanks to my parents), but I am reliant of Social Security Disability (SSDI) income and a part time security job that pays $16.50 an hour/24 hours a week.

I feel like I am meant for something better in life and feel lost, career speaking. I am not a homeowner, and even without rent or mortgage payments I feel financially drained and unstable. I feel I am fighting this depression as if I am not living up to my full potential. I feel this intense, prolonged burnout. I don't even know what I am passionate for anymore.