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Protecting a Woman and Making Her Feel Safe, What it's Really All About (Page 2)
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Well, my female relatives and family members can take care of themselves, no problem. Trust me. I don't have a girlfriend. When I see women in public, I purposely avoid looking at them and I pretty much stay away from them because I think they will like it that way. The Internet has made me paranoid.
Sorry but I'd rather not be seen as a human shield.
Who said anything about being a human shield?
Wow I really enjoyed reading this I think it's a great take on protection.
Thank you.
The person I feel safest with is my brother. He's just super protective. He's not tall, he is muscular but I've always felt this way with him even when we were young.
lol i've never been protected by a guy. not even my ex when we were dating. i learned to protect myself and it kinda sucks cuz i wanna feel protected
Why do you want to feel protected?
@richardthefrog its just a nice feeling you know? im sure even guys enjoy feeling protected. it makes me feel like i can do anything. its like i have so much support and if i fall nothing's going to happen because there's always going to be someone there to catch me. it shows that people care
So girls get to act like bitches, get tons of shit for free, demand that people do things for them, and on top of it they want to feel protected?
Why would I want to protect someone like that? Why wouldn't I let them starve and leave them out in the cold?
@richardthefrog i dont know about the kind of women you've met but im not like that at all. please dont insult people without getting to know them first. im very loyal and protective. i dont demand anything but love, trust and loyalty from a partner. if you dont want to protect anyone then dont. no one is forcing you to. i just dont think its right to call me a bitch when you've never even spoken to me before. im very kind but i can be a bitch if i need to.
Yea I guess it's not everyone, huh?
@richardthefrog of course not. dont ever generalize.
You shouldn't search for security in men no matter how much your female instincts desire it. Security is an illusion. Your tall big brave husband can die any moment. Women have to learn to protect themselves.
Why do people keep preaching that? Did I ever once put in there that a woman should be dependent on a man for security and always be the damsel in distress? Did I ever say that? Because, I don't think I did. So, why people keep preaching this I have no clue.
Physical strength/appearance =\= strength of character/moral conviction. That's what I believe, but also what I think is your message here. Correct me if I'm wrong :)
Something like that, I guess but more that it's not how they look that should make you feel safe but who they are.
True that.
I have a friend who is one of the best people I've ever known. Yet, he's not the most athletic person.
Good take. I think this might be part of the reason why a few gals glance at me. Apparently I'm "emotionally calming" while giving the "don't screw with me" attitude.
I needed to add that I've read "Emotional Freedom" by Judith Orloff. It's helped me since I've realized that I can be an "emotional sponge" at times (I've learned to control it to a degree).
So what exactly causes the feeling of safety you describe? I'm glad you realized that just because a guy is tall doesn't mean he will be able to make you feel safe.
I'm not sure, it's just something I feel with certain people but it doesn't happen often.
So what can a man do to make his girl feel that way?
It's hard for me to explain, because there's really nothing specific that can be done. It's just with some people you just feel safe in every way, nothing they did made you feel that way. It's more about who they are and how they treat you and what they bring to your life that no one else does. Does that make sense?
That's unhelpful xD and there are things you can do I read them in a girls comment somewhere else. You can do some gentleman stuff open doors and so on. Be calm/ speak slow and clear / look her into the eyes / Don't be too over animated / Feel save and relaxed yourself / be in control of things / maybe lead the girl sometimes by putting your hand on her lower back / be helpful understanding and support the girl. That's pretty much u can do
@Dingsbums How is what I said unhelpful to the opinion owner? He asked if there was anything a guy could do to make a woman feel the way I described and I was telling him how it is for me. Maybe, what you describe is how it is for other women but for me there is no specific things that are done to make me feel that way. It's simple just that person themselves, not everything has a reason or can be explained. Some things are just natural and unexplainable.
I meant that your comment was unhelpful for him because u said that it just depends on the person and that there is nothing they did which triggered this feeling of safety. I don't think you are right with this everything has a reason but that's just my opinion. I agree with the rest of your take tho that you don't have to be tall and so on
He's right it's not that helpful. In beginning to think women really have no clue wtf they want.
Sorry you didn't find what I said helpful, but I'm not going to lie and make up all these things that were done to make me feel this way. When, there wasn't anything specific. I'm sorry.
Not your fault. Its just frustrating. I see all these assholes with women who love them, sometimes multiple women per guy, meanwhile the woman I thought was the love of my life cheats on then dumps me.
I feel so empty inside, trying to figure out what I am doing wrong. Sometimes I don't even want to get out of bed. Sometimes I just wish I was dead.
I'm very sorry you have to go through that, I can't imagine how that must feel. Being cheated on hurts, being dumped hurts but both at the same time, I imagine that's a pain no one can truly comprehend unless they experience it and I'm sorry you were one of the people that had to experience it.
First, I've never had an actual relationship but I have been emotionally hurt by a lot of people. So, I understand that empty feeling inside. But, you can't let it control you or feel like you being cheated on was your fault because it wasn't. She made a choice but that choice is not reflection on you, it's reflection on her. The fact that you found someone, proves that you obviously doing something right. But, you just found it with the wrong person. Not all women are like your ex, you need to know that. Your failed relationship isn't because you did something wrong, you need to know that too. I know it hurts now but it will get better, you need to know that also. Good luck to you :)
You know I always here about protecting the woman but I never hear about protecting the man. What is a man suppose to do when the IRS, the bill collectors and his boss come after him? Then what is he suppose to do when his woman is after him too?
I stopped reading at "The strength of a man isn't in the power of his arms"..
But, I didn't write that it was a quote from something I found online. I don't get people, you stopped reading because you didn't like the quote yet felt the need to give your opinion which was to say you stopped reading after you saw the quote. What is the point in that? Like why even waste your time?
You skip leg day?
I remember what a female friend told me about her boyfriend at that time. ''He's muscular enough to protect me, but who will protect me from him?''
And if my love is in my arms? My arms are doing the embracing.
I don't see how you can embrace a woman with your legs.
That'd just be weird.
You just gotta be more creative.
@bobwallice Maybe I'll just rip my bones from my flesh
and use them to embrace the Woman I adore.
I don't feel attracted to... cowards hiding behind me simply because of my gender
It's about a strong connection that would make me feel safe, not purely based on looks.
Great article! I belive that a couple has to be each others "safe place" Both of them have support and protect eachother.
Exactly.
Most women don't talk that way the ones who do are avoiding themselves.
And are not ready for an adult raltionship.
Of course there should be trust in a relationship but that's not " making someone feel " it's them having trust in you bc you're trustworthy.
Any kind of protection you can come up with from an I divusl can easily be overrides by another Individual or group. And if a person need to rely on an individual as apples to their meme region in society, they will never feel safe.
Only idiots focus on one aspect a person brings to a relationship, that's common sense to feel physically & emotionally safe with your partner.
Ya. ok, so you need money, protection and love , that's it?
why are people turning something simple, into something that it's not?
Let me break it down for you, I've been here 3 years and have seen women say the reason they like tall guys is because A) He's tall, so that makes her feel safe and B) she can wear heels. I personally don't think a person height or lack there of, should or shouldn't make you feel safe. That was the point of this, to let people know that just because someones tall doesn't mean they can protect you mentally, emotionally or physically and just because someones short doesn't mean they can't protect you that way. Height, is not what should make you feel safe it's the person themselves and feeling mentally and emotionally safe more then anything else.
Is this clear now? Or do I need to break down again for people?
Hey tell you what, you are dared to walk down a silent lane at night, where every night a rape case occurs. But you are made to choose one among two men for your protection, one is an unhealthy dwarf and other one is a Pro Wwe wrestler , who would you choose?
Anticipating the surroundings is the most basic quality of any animal. You cannot change that with the 'I want to change the woooorld' speech.
Let's just agree to disagree.
If you cannot give a reason to disagree, then it is your ignorance.
whatever society says is shit. sorry i can't take seriously such opinions on "love"... .