7 Reasons Why Being Friend-Zoned Can Actually Benefit You

[TruExo]

Now then, you may be thinking to yourself, Mr. DAN THE MAN that's crazy, why would being friend zoned be beneficial?

First let's dive into the word. Friend means companion; someone to confide in, talk to, trust, company with. Zone; an area specific to a place or thing separate from a larger place or picture.

See a lot of people view it as a curse but I see It as an advantage. You have made yourself separate from those douchy pick up guys who cat-call generally. They will look for sex but you on the other hand have earned her trust. Being a friend is not an easy thing to accomplish. Especially when friends come and go in this era. So don't beat yourself up. When she/he makes you her friend don't look at it as zoned only. But be honored. That person has giving you their trust. So when times go bad who can they go to. YOU. stop thinking like you're not going anymore. All great love stories started with friendship. Here are the reasons why it would help you.

1. You earned their trust. That means whenever they feel sad, depressed and mad they go to you for comfort.

2. You know everything about them. This is crucial. It's here as friends you learned about the many things of a person. Ugly and beautiful. Take that time as friends to know them in depth. So that way whenever you enter a relationship with that person. You won't be surprised about any habit or thing they do and you won't feel disgusted.

3. Being the shoulder to lean on is an important job. Make sure that shoulder is always available you don't know when they will need you

4. Yes they have a gf/bf. Yes, you're the third wheel. But hey at least they will remember you were always there and that's the important thing.

5. You're Friendzoned. Yay. That means you're a pal. Now don't mess this up. Make her laugh. Which leads to the next part.

6. Make her laugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Girls especially. Make them laugh fellas. No matter what type of girl you're dealing with. All of thom big or small love a great laugh. And if you can do that. You will definitely leave a mark.

7. For the ladies make sure you do this for the guys who Friendzoned you. Absolutely nothing. We guys are easy to be friends with. Nothing special there.

Lastly: when everything said and done after all the patience and waiting. You were always there and you were the absolute perfect friend.

So folks enough with making friend zone a curse when it'd actually a blessing. If your friend zone good keep at it. Be a better friend. And remember always respect their relationship first. Don't come in between them. Don't be that person. Wait your time will come.

Have a great day people.

[NorthWoods813]

The reason guys get friend-zoned in the first place is because they make themselves too available. Masculine energy is all about leading and making decisions. Feminine energy is about commitment and connecting. Guys now have it all backwards. They see movies like the notebook or any tv show where the guy chases the girl for weeks/months/years before she finally throws the towel in and decides to date him. And this is what guys do now. They go on a date or two with a girl and think they need to do something. The illusion of action. They start trying to prove to the girl how great they are and why they should be with them. This is so backwards. And then the guy tries to tie the girl down to a relationship which is the worst thing you could possibly do. This will get you friend zoned almost instantly. And then guys who are friend zoned will read an article like this and think "Hey if I agree to be friends and do all this for her then someday she'll make me her boyfriend! Just like the movies and tv shows."

The best thing you can do when a girl says, "Lets just be friends" or "I need to work on me" or any other excuse they give because you're not being masculine then you need to tell her what you want. You say "Hey I really care about you but I'm not looking for a friendship. If you ever change your mind though, give me a call." And then walk away and mean it. This means no contact initatiated by you at all. You do this and I garauntee she'll be calling within a week. And when she does you say "Hey its great to hear from you! When are you free to get together?" Set a definite date at a definite time. This means hey I'll pick you up on Tuesday at 6pm at your house. Not hey lets hang out text me when you want me to come. Honestly, its all about masculine and feminine energy. Stop watching the tv shows and the movies where the guy chases the girl until she gets her. Or at least stop believing thats how it works. And stop reading articles like this.

[Spartan117]

I hope your right. The other day I told this girl we should be more than friends. I told her to give me a clear answer but she never replied

[hottabasco]

@Spartan117 : Then drop her

[Spartan117]

@hottabasco I want to but I already know she does like me cauae her friends told me. I asked her again to answer my question and all she said was why should I? I never get a clear answer from her

[NorthWoods813]

@Spartan117 You just answered your own question. Three things you did wrong. First, you asked for an answer. This comes across as weak to a woman because she thinks you're sitting around waiting for her instead of moving on with your life and dating other women. How is she supposed to feel like she's going to lose you if she thinks you're waiting around for an answer? Second you asked her AGAIN to answer your question. You have to walk away and mean it. That means you say what you have to and then walk away with the mindset that this girl is out of your life. Because as far as you're concerned, she is. Third problem is you told her you should be more than friends. A relationship should always be the girls idea, not the guys. Confident guys don't tell girls they should date them. Confident guys know that the girl they're dating wants to be with them and she will eventually ask the guy to be her boyfriend. I've written a bunch of stuff on this in the forums check them out.

[cmarie1971]

Being friends with someone of the opposite sex is great even if there isn't any romantic interest.
The only problem I see is I've known a few women who think the "friend zone" means "I'll keep stringing this person along until I want something from them. Avoid women like that they give the rest of us a bad name.

[CancerianMan81]

plan too

[LittleSally]

Great answer. =)

[matt1209]

@cmarie1971 do you think it's a good ideal to be friends with a ex girlfriend. I still have feelings for her and I think she still has feelings for me, but her feeling are still hurt because she thinks im not sexually attracted to her.

[Anonymous]

I am crazy in love with this guy at work. We were both in other relationships when I started working there. But gradually over time things began to change with us. Or maybe the seed was planted on first sight. Anyway, I probably wasn't really happy in my relationship that I got attracted to this guy in the first place. Turns out he wasn't either. I couldn't even believe what was happening at first. He started giving strong hints but never an outright request. I don't know. I really didn't understand if he was being genuine or just manipulative. He really lost it though, one time, for just a second. It's so hard to judge these things correctly. I tried to show interest too, but it seems he couldn't believe it either, and so sort of rejected the whole idea. Which left me feeling confused. And of course I was afraid it would be disrespectful if I tried to breach that wall he set up. Both of us are introverts, so maybe that accounts for the staying away despite the attraction. But I think things would have taken a turn for the better if while I was still pondering things, this other lady hadn't come into the picture. She sent him some of her home cooking, and I noticed he was going around without his promise ring for the first time in the past 3 years. She was one of our clients, and I did notice some unusual behavior regarding him from her as well. Finally I saw a picture of him on a public website a week ago with this lady in a public event. So their relationship seems to be getting on. Now I can't even claim to be heartbroken, since our relationship never was really defined as anything in the first place. So, with respect to your article, exactly where does that leave me now? Friendzoned? Heartbroken? Ignore what happened just a short while ago? I really don't know how to behave towards him now. (P. S. he doesn't know that I have seen his pics with this other lady. I bet he doesn't even know his pics are accessible by the public. Should I tell him I saw them?)

[matt1209]

No don't tell him you saw those pictures he might think your stalking him. Maybe before they get to serious you should go all out and try asking him out.

[TruExo]

No don't tell him

[TruExo]

You are frienzoned. And as long as he he didn't marry her. You're still in the ball game. Just be a friend to him no matter what show support and when he is said be there for him. The little things matter. But at the end of the day respect his relationship. And tell him how you feel too. Nothing wrong with that

[Anonymous]

Why hitting wall with you head is good for you? Yes its great for you, harder you hit better. Its Shaolin style exercise you will just use it at beyond godlike lvl. (yes its sarcasm that you can smell)
I usually end up friend zoned. One of thous girls actually told me after that i should be more physically aggressive (am not one of soft guys, can bench press 150 kg, i just try to be gentle to others). Last time was friend zoned for 11 years, now she is almost married. I am still good friend with her i know her fiance, he is actually good guy, but after being friend for that long i actually started to understand girls really good and hate them a lot. I mean hate them when it comes to dating. I am never going to be bad towards them just after thous 15 years am sick of how they work and all games they play and crape they expect us to tolerate. Yes every girl is different but still all are same when it comes to dating. If i find girl that is not wired like this i will give her chance, at moment i just ignore girls. My female friends dont understand why i am like this, why i ignore girls even ones that they know i find really attractive, even when they try to flirt with me. Funny thing is my female friends keep telling me my girlfriend will be happy girl and then they keep wondering why i just walk away when opportunity appears.
Dont know if its too much to expect to find girl that dont do thous bullshit mind-fuck games? O and am 33 years old so not just some kid.
So yeah if you like to hate girls friend zone is great for you, excellent way to develop understanding of how they are wired and aversion for it.

[AdamThomas]

I can see how these things might sound great if you struggle to make friends, but I don't and I have all the friends I need, why would I care about all of these things with a woman I want to date?

You say you think it's good to separate yourself from "creepy" pua guys and earn her trust, but plenty of pua guys do earn a girl's trust and get into relationships and I was one of them, now in a 3+ year relationship with a son and another one on the way. You think you're doing better because the girl trusts you and it seems like you assume that eventually she'll change her mind, but the main reason guys get friend-zoned is this, girls don't see them in a sexual or romantic way at all, only a platonic way. They'll never change their mind over a guy like that, and the only reason they trust the guy is because they know he won't try to make a move, almost like a gay best friend. I'd never want to be that guy.

[JohnDoe3000]

These aren't really advantages to being friendzoned. I can think of three actual advantages:

1) you get to learn about female psychology (if you have actual two-way conversations and sometimes push her a little)

2) after you get over her you have a wingwoman who can put in a good word for you

3) she's a gateway to her female friends and friends of friends.

But in general, I don't think sticking around in the friend zone is worth it, it's degrading in a way.

[BubbleBoy69]

3) Not necessarily. There is something called girl approval. If she doesn't find you attractive then her friends would follow along the same lines more often than not. Women are competitive and their is no competition in taking a man that her girlfriend friend zoned unless you are a catch.

The best chance you have of fucking her friends is if you dated her and you broke up with her.

[JohnDoe3000]

@BubbleBoy69

True to an extent, but you can get lucky if the female friends don't know about the friend zoning or if the girl who friend zoned you was the hottest/most eligible in her friends group. Also, the friends of friends won't care much I think. It all depends a lot on why you were friend zoned (let's say you're nedry and the girl only likes jocks but one of her friends is totally into nerds, I don't think the friend would see you as less valuable).

[JohnDoe3000]

But if you were friend zoned because she found you creepy or ugly it will definitely be harder to win over one of her friends (but again, friends of her friends wouldn't know/care).

[Anonymous]

Actually there is one benefit of being in the friendzone.

1. When a girl get's horny... there is huge possibility you can turn the relationship into a friends with benefits relationship.
2. She can introduce you to her friends and you can hopefully get sex out of it.

[Ceciliamoore]

Oh god..

[TruExo]

Um no not what I was getting at. But do you bro.

[WombRaider]

Being in a MUTUALLY platonic friendship with a member of the opposite sex is just fine, because no one wants anything more and it won't ever be awkward.

When there's unreciprocated romance, it's a horrible experience and the best thing to do is move on.

Don't encourage people to go through hell, it's insensitive.

[hottabasco]

This is absolutely right

[Browneye57]

Also called a beta orbiter. Yes, girls love them, especially the validation queens.
You are willing to be in the FZ just hoping maybe one day she'll give you a little sex - not gonna happen and don't know why you would hang around wasting your time waiting like that.

So there, you're a complete beta schlub for staying in the FZ. It's a worthless man that's willing to do that.

[Anonymous]

2) is so true. I remember coming across a mytake where a guy was talking about how he has an easy time becoming friends with women and they open up to him about what goes on in their heads. He came to realize after hearing all this that women are very fucked up in the head. Especially in how they go about picking the men they want to sleep with and get into a relationship with.

[Giacomanzo]

There is a large gap between being friend with a woman and being friend-zoned by a woman. The second implies you are romantically interested in her, meaning you are only nice with her because you want to becoming her fiancé.
In other words, being friend is being actually nice with someone, man or woman, keeping yourself friendzoned is being a manipulator.

[BubbleBoy69]

"keeping yourself friendzoned is being a manipulator."

Keeping yourself in the frienzoned is being manipulated.

[Fixed for you]

[Giacomanzo]

@BubbleBoy69 Well, let's say both.

[AleDeEurope]

This is the equivalent of "the most importance thing is participating".
Sorry, but if I don't win the girl, I don't wanna be a friend.

[Marinepilot]

Agreed.

[ConsultantIsBack]

You're crazy if you waste your time, energy, resources, etc with a girl you're into but are friend zoned. Go find your match

[BubbleBoy69]

Good advice. Fulfilling all the boyfriend duties for a girl and not getting anything in return is a waste of your time.

[carlitoswayy]

@BubbleBoy69 agree with both!

[timmy111]

agree with @ConsultantIsBack
Investing too much time into this situation will hurt your chances of finding better for yourself

[Marinepilot]

Fuck that shit ! How fucking weak can you be? All you're ever
going to get is some bad boys leftovers with this view. Goddammit be a man !
Friendzone my ass !

[anonman32]

when you are in the friend zone you are behind enemy lives, then you can target her friends with minimal defenses. no introduction or cheesy pick up line needed.

[Anonymous]

IF she's really you're friend, she'll help you hook up with another girl.

If she won't, she's a user, not a friend.

[BubbleBoy69]

The only friend she'll help you hook up with is one of her friends who is desperate.

[Anonymous]

What i get. from. here is that you might be one of those dudes who happens to get friendzoned all the time. and just rather be a third wheel..

Better move on to someone who actually likes u buddy.

[Fearless_banana]

Why do you have your awkward selfie up on this take?

[fueledbythc]

I want a female friend not a girlfriend. I want to be friendzoned. Do I need to be meek?

[Marinepilot]

You already are.

[fueledbythc]

@Marinepilot if my words on this site come across as meek then I'm coming across as the opposite of who I am in person. I should be more like how I type online then.

[Marinepilot]

I damn hope so. Men put up with far too much shit from women. Especially American men.

[fueledbythc]

@Marinepilot it's the fact that so many me treat women differently instead of equals.

[Marinepilot]

It may very well be.

[passhuntemple]

big men don't bitch about the friendzone... move on

[Words_and_Wisdom]

Forgot a key one: They can help you hook up with their friends.

[norsenorthman]

you're a man handle it, nobody owes you anything. lolol.