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Many "bad" relationships could be totally avoided, if we knew how to look out for huge red flags in the early stages of the relationship.
Often, we get so excited just to be with SOMEONE, that we overlook or ignore huge red flags that tell us the relationship is going nowhere fast. It's better to look for these red flags early on, identify them, and either move on or address them right away. Here are just a few red flags that might let you know that the other person isn't the one for you:
1. They want to move way too fast.
If the person you're with never wants you out of their sight, or wants to step things up almost immediately without getting to know each other first, they could have boundary issues. This will almost always spill over into other areas of life. You could be dealing with someone that's volatile or even abusive.
On the other side of that, if the other person wants to move way too slow (never showing physical affection, or treating you "like a friend"), that's just as bad. This is more gut feeling than anything, but if you feel uncomfortable, don't ignore the feeling.
2. Gets angry easily.
For both men and women, everyone has their breaking point. But if your partner seems to get overly angry over small things (ex. you're 15 minutes late and they flip out, scream and shout, or give you the "silent treatment") you could be dealing with someone who has mental health problems, and needs to get those addressed before they can be in a mature relationship.
3. A history of bad relationships or crazy exes.
If your current love interest still has "ex issues" or has a lot of exes still in their life, that's a huge red flag. Catching up with an ex once in a while is perfectly fine, but if your partner is constantly talking to exes or still including them in their life, that's a good sign that soon you're going BE one of those exes. Steer clear.
4. Never takes responsibility.
If your partner is a "negative nelly" that constantly blames everyone else for things going wrong, red flag. My dad used to have a saying - "If one person calls you a jackass, laugh at them. If a hundred people call you a jackass, find a saddle." Basically, if your partner is ALWAYS blaming the people around them for things going wrong, it won't be long before you end up getting blamed for all the problems in the relationship, as well.
5. Never wants to talk about their past.
This is a huge red flag. Any real relationship should be open and the person should be more than willing to talk about their history and how they ended up where they are today. If they're reluctant to talk about anything or they constantly try to change the subject, you need to find out why.
Often, we get so excited just to be with SOMEONE, that we overlook or ignore huge red flags that tell us the relationship is going nowhere fast. It's better to look for these red flags early on, identify them, and either move on or address them right away. Here are just a few red flags that might let you know that the other person isn't the one for you:
"If your current love interest still has 'ex issues,' or has a lot of exes still in their life, that's a huge red flag."
1. They want to move way too fast.
If the person you're with never wants you out of their sight, or wants to step things up almost immediately without getting to know each other first, they could have boundary issues. This will almost always spill over into other areas of life. You could be dealing with someone that's volatile or even abusive.
On the other side of that, if the other person wants to move way too slow (never showing physical affection, or treating you "like a friend"), that's just as bad. This is more gut feeling than anything, but if you feel uncomfortable, don't ignore the feeling.
2. Gets angry easily.
For both men and women, everyone has their breaking point. But if your partner seems to get overly angry over small things (ex. you're 15 minutes late and they flip out, scream and shout, or give you the "silent treatment") you could be dealing with someone who has mental health problems, and needs to get those addressed before they can be in a mature relationship.
3. A history of bad relationships or crazy exes.
If your current love interest still has "ex issues" or has a lot of exes still in their life, that's a huge red flag. Catching up with an ex once in a while is perfectly fine, but if your partner is constantly talking to exes or still including them in their life, that's a good sign that soon you're going BE one of those exes. Steer clear.
4. Never takes responsibility.
If your partner is a "negative nelly" that constantly blames everyone else for things going wrong, red flag. My dad used to have a saying - "If one person calls you a jackass, laugh at them. If a hundred people call you a jackass, find a saddle." Basically, if your partner is ALWAYS blaming the people around them for things going wrong, it won't be long before you end up getting blamed for all the problems in the relationship, as well.
5. Never wants to talk about their past.
This is a huge red flag. Any real relationship should be open and the person should be more than willing to talk about their history and how they ended up where they are today. If they're reluctant to talk about anything or they constantly try to change the subject, you need to find out why.
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