These Are The Things To "Remember" When Looking for Love

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

On the right path to love

In my opinion, people put too much importance on things that shouldn't/ don't matter when it comes to loving someone.

These are the things I feel people should know or remember when looking for a partner to love.

Looks will fade with age

Still the same man inside

Yes, we all want to be physically attracted to our partner. But it shouldn't be based on just looks.

Be attracted to their beautiful mind, their beautiful heart, their beautiful soul.

True inner beauty never fades

Inner beauty will always surpass outer beauty, because someone can be beautiful on the outside, but ugly on the inside. Outer beauty "only " will not last and to me if you're ugly on the inside, the outer beauty means nothing, makes you less attractive.

Value who they are as a person not what they "have"

Love the person not their possessions

You should never love someone just for what they have or what they can give you. That's not "real" love.

Financial matters can be important in choosing someone you want to spend your life with. But, more in the way that you want someone that is willing to work as hard as you to provide for your life together and if you decide to have a family. Not just someone to live off, and expect them to totally support you. Unless that is something they "choose" or "want to do for you.

Money can't buy love

Financial situations can change at any given time in our lives. So it can't/ should never be just about that.

Values and character traits

Good character=good person

The values and character of a person are important not only in defining who they are as a person, but whether they're good for "you". You should always remember though, that if you expect those qualities in a person, you should possess those qualities yourself.

How someone treats you is so important . It "shows" they love you .Anyone can say "the words"

But, love, real love is shown by actions.

Love should be seen not just heard

Little acts of love mean more than any gifts you can buy/ receive, any money you bestow/ receive.

Call me corny, but I believe these are things that are most important if you"really" love someone. And you'll remember, miss the most/ be remembered, missed the most for when death does you part.

Thanks for reading

"brainbeforebeauty"❤

[FatherJack]

" You should never love someone just for what they have or what they can give you. That's not "real" love. " ... Bravo !! Like this take , very well put , but in reality very few will apply this. True unconditional love between woman and man is exceedingly rare. One of the main reasons I do not date and would far rather stay single , you can only rely on yourself and I do not want to carry any more passengers , I have 2 teens to raise solo.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I would like to tell you not to become jaded by past hurt. But im becoming so by the things I've encountered on here. I still want to believe tho, that some people are still this way. But yeah, I didn't become single by choice, rather because the death of my husband 6 years ago. I stay single by choice because I fear finding another great man like him is impossible in today's gender bashing, hook up, is ok to cheat society

[FatherJack]

Firstly , my condolences for your loss , that is a terrible blow. No bitterness or animosity from me towards women , more indifference and disinterest now. I prefer my own company & helped by my Male Curse fading away with age & stress over the years. Also , I'm a single dad and very few women will give me the time of day , have to be real here. Dating , for a man , is hard work , have enough work as it is.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I'm sorry. No women should shun a single dad. He should be revered instead. I hate that women complain that men don't act like dad's but then when they do they use the "you can't see the kids" as form of punishment after a break up. Kids should never be used as a tool. And any woman that doesn't respect the good father you are is not worthy of your time. I see it as something that should show true good qualities in a man. Best of luck with your children and in life❣

[HindsightJon]

For every woman that thinks these things I hope there is a man that thinks these things as well and they meet someday.

I am younger, but still have these values myself and have found it extremely hard to find someone that truly believes, lives, and loves like this.

I wish you the best of luck! Life is a marathon and not a race... just keep swimming!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You as well. And please don't let bitter haters change the good values and beliefs you have.
Good luck to you ❣

[MelissaMarie9614]

Love it! These are definitely the things to remember when looking for love and finally meeting the person you'll love forever. I'm very much looking for love and never giving up on love! These are important to remember. Thanks!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you❣

[flowersFORlilies]

I totally agree with you and this is what I'm also looking for. I would add age as well in either way. Sometimes an older person can be childish, while a younger one could be mature.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

So very true!!!

[SydneySentinel]

Lovely. You're absolutely right. Thanks for sharing!!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you❣

[jdhtx1]

I dated a girl who wanted a relationship with a guy who was honest... but then, decided that wasn't enough...
I dated a girl who wanted someone who was kind, but then decided that wasn't enough...
I dated a girl who wanted a guy who was hot and in shape, but then decided after getting that guy, that wasn't enough.
Why? Those traits are great overall, but day to day, character isn't entertaining, nice isn't necessarily fun, being hot is great, and sexy but it doesn't equate to being engaging, being rich can be fun but it doesn't mean you'll have a connection. Day to day, laughter can sustain any relationship and being able to have fun doing almost nothing makes a relationship worth having. It makes everything better. Those other traits are fine and important but laughing with your SO and having as much fun as possible even when you're doing virtually nothing, to me, is most important.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You're right about that. Sense of humor important. Someone to help you laugh when all you wanna do is cry. If you can laugh at the little things it can help overcome other things

[Lliam]

Great MyTake, bbb. I couldn't agree more. You perfectly described the difference between love and infatuation/lust.
I think a person has to experience infatuation/lust relationships in their life before they can understand the kind of love that you described. At least that was the case with me. It took me a long time to figure out that there was more to love than sex and mere appreciation for the opposite gender.
That's why I think it's naive for people to think they are going to find the perfect partner and get married without first experiencing life to the fullest. It's like waiting to taste the perfect cake without ever having tasted cake before. They are saving themselves for something they don't even understand or fully grasp. If they haven't experienced the thrill and ecstasy of physical infatuation and lust, they can't have the wisdom to recognize and appreciate that there is something greater. They're just picturing a Disney fairy tale.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you❣and yeah real life is never a fairy tale, not even with love.

[Lliam]

It's true. I was struggling with how to explain my thought.
Infatuation is about idealizing someone.
Love sees the person for who they are, imperfections and all, and cares for them as deeply as a parent cares for their child. People in love also work to understand and support each other, lift each other up, make each other happy, compromise and sacrifice when necessary, be the best they can be for each other, and keep their love burning bright. And you're right. It isn't a fairy tale.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

And it's never easy. But worth it in the end!!

[broken_heart_at_48]

I agree %100 and I'm really missing what my wife and I once had for 23 years even though after that 23 years we had a not so great 5 years and now she's sick and we're separated ( my choice before she got sick her choice after she got sick) but I don't think I would be having such a hard time if she wasn't sick

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

So she's not doing any better?

[broken_heart_at_48]

No she can't walk without help even with a walker

[broken_heart_at_48]

I feel defeated and lost

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Message me if you need fo tak

[McKellar]

My dear,... out of all of the posts of which I have read in relations to this topic, I very much think you nailed this one no problem & very much can fully concur with you on this topic. There's nothing on here that you had mentioned which would cause me to raise more questions & further debate. ( and with most people who have posted something like this, I very much have questioned & debated with them a lot LOL ) You on the other hand,... I don't need to. You definitely get my vote. :-)

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Aww thank you so much❣❣

[laurieluvsit]

You've outdone yourself again Ms BBB... this myTake is...

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Aww shucks thank you🤗

[laurieluvsit]

You're welcome :)

[kymberz]

what beautiful words and from someone so wise? you can be sure that i am memorizing these words that have always been etched on my soul. thank you for the memories and the reminders. you know what i mean. thank you.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Aww thank you❣

[kymberz]

imagine eh? here we are again saying thank you back and forth. it's like a merry go round. and i ain't getting off of this ride for nothing. so thank you back i guess - teehee! oh man you will always make me think of baby shark and hang on - i tried to play the hound dog group song but my wifi cut out or something... i'll message you!

[TCredo]

Wonderful post - thanks for sharing. One thought I had as I was reading deals with materialism... I've noticed a trend with people who place a high value on materialism and expect "things" from their SO don't seem to be very happy.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I agree 100%

[nelly83]

I think one of the reasons why relationships are so unsuccessful nowadays is due to lust, shortsightedness, selfishness and impulsiveness. This is why people select wrong mates

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Sadly, I have to agree with you.

[Jjpayne]

I could not agree more! This was very refreshing for me to read! Thank you!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you friend

[Avicenna]

I agree 100%. My narcissistic ex should take these to heart.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Sorry for the narcissistic ex. But thanks for reading❣

[Wuodan]

The statements made by this Lady are stunningly wise and true through all time. She unusually gifted mentally and emotionally. The kind of Lady every decent man seeks for a life-long marriage.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you kind sir for your beautiful answer❣

[coachTanthony]

I agree totally. Well done!

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you coach!

[FlutteringFeelings]

Never look for love. Love will find you, and when it does just make sure you are whole internally and are prepared receive it.

[Adam1978]

That only works if you have the social contact surface that allows you to be found. If you don't you need to be out there looking by creating said social contact surface.

[Rangers]

Nice take, not that people will listen, unfortunately since they're too dense to get it.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Yes sometimes they are... but hope some people get it... you know what/ who I mean right?🤔🤗

[Rangers]

What part of what you said do you believe I don't follow?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

That you can find love, or that sometimes you have to make/ create your own happiness. Yet, still don't give up on you!

[Rangers]

I'm talking to a girl, it's going better than I thought, but getting her to me will be a lengthy and expensive process should it get to that point because she lives in another country, but I met her here.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

See, won't say told you so lol.. but next time listen to old lady, she knows some things lol really hope it works out for you🤗

[Rangers]

I wouldn't speak too soon, her aunt lives in Seattle and she plans on going there to be a nurse in a few years, so I'll have to win over their support to take her down to Texas with me since I can't stand to live in a gun free state and I think we'd both be much happier in the Lonestar state

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You just don't wanna admit I was/ am right lol it's okay lol used to it

[Rangers]

I'm saying don't speak too soon, it'll still be many years until me and her can live together, assuming it gets to that point.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You never know

[Rangers]

Exactly, which is why I wouldn't celebrate just yet

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Don't celebrate, Just be more positive

[Rangers]

I'm trying to be, but I get scared that if I get too comfortable, she'll slip away

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

It's okay to be scared. That's normal. Anyone gets little scared when dealing in love. Just don't let negativity get in the way. You'll be ok. Even if this doesn't work out, it shows you that you can get someone interested. Look at it that way.

[COMMODOREII]

You are not corny my friend i value these sale things as well.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Thank you friend!!🤗

[COMMODOREII]

*same things. 😂

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Don't worry lol I got what you meant lol

[Oram52]

Yes totally agree with you, love this. However we also think with our eyes, and passion or love can blind us to person in front.

[Anonymous]

Honesty, loyalty and communication is important. Miss communication leads to a lot of things e. g. arguments.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Exactly. Good point!

[Anonymous]

Imagine having a kid with someone ugly. And the kid would inherent their ugly look and get bullied in school and get depressed and have a whole fucking shitty life because "good heart matters more" I'd rather have someone cheating on me, divorce, take everything what I worked for and falsely accuse me with rape than someone who ruins the whole childhood and possibly life of a future kid.

[jointhemiles]

I agree with you but do you think are we in this society, because people behave opposite

[jointhemiles]

Hey I need your opinion on few of the things, can you DM?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

You can ask here.

[jointhemiles]

Hmmmm no, leave it