Relationships

How to get in a relationship and stay there

This is too broad a topic for me to cover everything but lately a lot of people on G@G have been asking similar questions. So, I figured I'll at least hit the basics.


1) HOW TO APPROACH/ASK OUT SOMEONE


How to get in a relationship and stay there.


CONFIDENCE! I know this is hard for people that are shy or nervous or simply racked with anxiety. This is easy to remedy; smile. That's all it takes. It makes you appear confident and sure of yourself and it makes the other person feel at ease. Eye contact is also important, it makes you look interested and trustworthy.


2) WHAT TO SAY


How to get in a relationship and stay there


That's the big kicker; what do I say? How do I say it?! Let's start with what not to say; cheesy pick up lines, pervy comments and boring/negative topics - your terrible job/boss/landlord/ex or the weather. Say something cute, awkward, original. Mostly this applies to the guys because of the cute little tradition that they have to make the first move but there are the ballsy girls or those that have immense crushes on a guy that might find this helpful.


Ask for the time or comment on the book the person is holding or say something about the music they're listening to. Ladies, abuse your feminity, ask for help, even if it's just a piece of paper!


Don't forget the 'Hey'!


3) WHERE TO GO


Dinner. I'm joking. That is the most obvious and a favourite. A little overdone, me thinks. If you are going out to eat, in your head you think that the food and music will provide a distraction when the silence becomes a constant. Bleh, leave the dinner for later, because what if you don't know his/her preference? What if he/she is vegan/vegetarian or uncomfortable in such an environment or has a personal vendetta against the owner?! Also, the table acts as a barrier between the two of you, limiting contact, I mean, come on, do you really wanna worry about how to take his/her hand without spilling the wine?


What is acceptable? Movies are a maybe, it's not exactly the best place to talk and what if you ahte the other persons popcorn eating habit? Places to go - bowling, dancing and just anywhere that you can interact bith physically and verbally.


Also if you get stuck on what to say, just ask about the persons interest and get them talking about that, people love talking about themselves!


3) WHAT TO WEAR

How to get in a relationship and stay there


Easiest thing to decide, where what ever goes with the place you are going, don't over do it, tone down the make-up and you can never go wrong with a dress. Guys don't look sloppy and gritty, I'm not saying dust out your Armani, but just look respectfully clean.


4) GIFTS


It's ridiculous how people don't know what to get and what's acceptable to get for someone else. This applies to the guys and I'm not speaking for all the girls!


CLOTHES - Never! You don't know my style and you are not my mom. Even she stopped dressing me a long time ago. You don't like the way I dress? Bye bye!


JEWELLERY - Only if it has sentimental value, I don't want your grandma's gold bracelets on the first date.


MONEY - This has more to do with you pay for the date if you asked me out! Unless you told me beforehand we were going halfsies. Even if she insists on paying, be the gentleman.


Then for the lucky ones who are already in a relationship, here are a few pointers.


5) HOW TO MAINTAIN THE RELATIONSHIP

How to get in a relationship and stay there


TRUST - Yeah, yeah, yeah, we all claim to trust our partners completely but that doesn't stop us from checking his/her fb/IG/twitter/snapchat and everything else. Going through someone's phone has to be by far the worst, you hve been trusted with the password and these days that takes a lot of trust! You need to stop questioning him/her about that person that sent such and such or the friends they hang out with. You look crazy and suspicious and even that wasn't a good look on Henry VIII!


Even if you saw pictures of your partner doing something they shouldn't trust them! Talk to them of course, but don't scream at them, there could be a perfectly ok reason for it.


COMMUNICATION - So you are stressed and you have a deadline and tired and crabby, the you have to face your partner at the end of the day. Obviously they are gonna notice there is something wrong but they need to know what exactly. No one is psychic, so talk to them, don't give the cold shoulder or wait till you feel better about it. Let it all out.


COMPROMISE - You don't want to to go out to eat but he/she does, instead of fighting about it, bend a little and just go out. Next time you do what you want. Planning to go somewhere for the holidays, let him/her have the pick this time, next time it's your choice. Choosing baby names? You can relent and allow him/her to name the kid Echidna, next time, you pick (something less disastrous). It's all about give and take.


OTHER BASIC STUFF - Protect and respect your partner. Be understanding. Don't frigging cheat. Be surprising and spontaneous once in a while.


Hope this helps. :D

How to get in a relationship and stay there
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