I like a guy but I'm not ready for a relationship yet. What should I say to him?

[Jbgurl20]

Just broke up with my ex 3 months ago. I loved him and I was devastated when we broke up. I am moving on and I am starting to enjoy my life again. I started attending classes again and I met this wonderful nice guy in my class. We both like each other, we sit next to each other in our classes and we go out sometimes and we Skype for hours. I like him so much but I can honestly say I am not ready for a relationship yet. How can I tell it to him? And what should I do? Should I avoid this guy?

[billy420]

You just gotta say to him exactly what you have said to us. If you're not ready then that's fine why feel rushed? But if you explain your reasons to him I think he would wait until you were ready if you mean anything to him. If he isn't prepared to do that then is he worth it? Your decision of course. It will help you make a decision too. All the best

[Jbgurl20]

Thanks. I really like what you have said. Very helpful to me. I guess I'll tell that to him very soon. If he waits then he's worth it but if not then he is not the right guy for me. Thanks again

[billy420]

Yep that's what it comes down to really. Np, hope it all turns out well

[Jackthelad2014]

Don't lead him on. If you don't want to commit to a relationship, that's fine
.
Even say that to the guy, but then say for that reason that's why you need space and can't see each other. You need to distance yourself, but don't do that without telling him why.

[Jbgurl20]

But I like him. I don't really want to stay away from him or avoid him.

[Jackthelad2014]

But that's why you need to stay away from him. What's the point of liking him, if you can't be together? Your only lead him on, confuse him, and that's just not fair.

I know it's hard, but you need to make a decision, as you can't have both.

I had a girl lead me on, and mess me around for 6 months- it's really not a nice feeling.

[Jbgurl20]

I understand. I guess I will have to tell him that I am not ready for a relationship yet. If he waits for me to be ready then he's the one. :)

[Call_me_Ali]

Talk to him. If it comes up tell him that you like him but your not really looking to be in a relationship right now. He'll understand & if he doesn't then he's not worth it.

[Hans222]

No certainly not! If he likes you, he'll certainly understand that you need some time.
If there is a real click between you I cannot imagine he'll dump you.
What I would do, however, is not only explain him what you're not ready for, for the moment, but also what you'd like to do together.
And if he reacts positively, give him a nice cuddle next time you meet. That's the best message you can send someone!

[Jbgurl20]

Thanks. Maybe you're right. I will tell him that. :)

[Pennytingly]

Exactly what your title says pretty much. Tell him that You like him but you're just not ready for a relationship yet as you've recently came out of a relationship. If he likes you enough back he'll understand and be patient :) Just don't keep him hanging for too long or he'll move on lol

[Jbgurl20]

That's what I am afraid of cuz I really like him but a relationship won't do good to me, I'm still in the process of moving on from my past relationship.

[Pennytingly]

Just explain that too him :) It'll make him feel happy knowing that you like definitely like him and would be interested in a relationship with him when the time is right..

[Jbgurl20]

Yes I will do that. :) thanks

[IIIIIIIIIIIIIII]

how about... i like you.. but im not ready for a relationship yet `? be honest.. if you make him false hopes it will make him even sader and even tell him that you dont like frindzoning him ^^ but it has to be done
be honest

[Jbgurl20]

I haven't told him that I like him. But I know he knows because I like spending time with him. I am not friendzoning him, I am just not ready for now. You're right, I will tell him that when the right time comes, but I am afraid he will stop doing the things that he does to me once I tell him that.

[IIIIIIIIIIIIIII]

why would he stop doing that? c: if he loves you too then he will wait for you im sure
i would do that if i know she will be together with me one day

[Jbgurl20]

Idk, I am just afraid of him withdrawing himself from me. Anyway thanks for your opinion. God bless

[bDizzie]

You can tell him "I'm not ready for a relationship", but he will take it to mean "I'm not ready for a relationship WITH YOU"

But hey, if you're not ready then you're not ready.

[mario1321]

Dont avoid him unless your bored of him, just be honest he may not like it but he will have too respect it.

[Anonymous]

It's funny because, I was just asking this the other day... basically, should you ask someone out, if you aren't ready to commit. Basically, are you a casual dater?

[Jbgurl20]

I am not a casual dater. I never really go out on dates. I just see him in school and church and we went to eat once after church. Lol I don't think you should ask someout out if you're not ready to commit. Hahaha

[Opinion Owner]

That's funny, most women would be terrified of being asked out, right away, having not gone on dates. I wonder if that's a Philippine thing

[Opinion Owner]

By the way, you might want to edit your profile. You say you "love your boyfriend Jay" in it still.

[Jbgurl20]

Hahaha. I am kind of terrified too you know? Haha that's why I don't go out with guys... lol I will have to edit my profile soon hahaha poor Jay

[Opinion Owner]

What's funny is you "loved him"

[Jbgurl20]

Just edited my profile. Well yeah, I loved him, maybe I still do. But it's imoossible for me and Jay to be together cuz we're like thousand miles apart and I like another guy now hahaha.

[Opinion Owner]

So, you were cheating, essentially

[Jbgurl20]

Omg! That's the last thing I would do! I don't cheat, never have and never will! Lol we broke up 3 months ago, actually he was the one who broke up with me and told me I should find a guy who will be there for me..

[Opinion Owner]

Don't you think he was testing you? He wanted to see how committed you were. You failed

[Jbgurl20]

Nope he is not testing me. We are not even friends anymore, we live in different countries so a relationship is really impossible. He already told me to find another guy a long time ago and I know he already found a girl and I know he cheated on me once, so there's no testing here. It's clear that he doesn't want me anymore.

[Anonymous]

Why can't you be friends with him for now?

[Jbgurl20]

We're friends atm

[Opinion Owner]

So whats the problem? If he wants a relationship and you don't just tell him you're not ready for a relationship, but continue being friends.

[Jbgurl20]

Yes you're right. Thanks

[Anonymous]

You should focus on your studies.

[Jbgurl20]

Im done with ny studies now

[Opinion Owner]

Then find job.

[Jbgurl20]

Thats what i do