My friend with benefits..He gets jealous & mad if I'm talking to other men..Do you think he wants more?

I want to know...why do men get jealous..Does it mean he has to care more about me then he's willing to admit? or could it be he wants to be free but wants me all to himself?

He is 44 years old & I am 36 years old..We have been friends with benefits on & off again for 4 years. He gets jealous & mad If we are together & another man calls me or in the past I was open with who else I was seeing, he would get mad & jealous. He would show it by basically telling me I had to leave...then he would ignore me for 2 or 3 weeks...If we were chatting online on yahoo and I mentioned a man, then he would just sign off WITH OUT saying good bye & then also ignore me for a few weeks.

He has from time to time..told me he loves me & he wants a relationship with me...and I said yes (about 4 times) but he always ended up saying he changed his mind...but yet he still gets mad if he hears of another man.

I need more opinions please!


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What Guys Said 1

  • One of two things is going on.

    Either he wants a relationship and is afraid you'll get bored of him, or won't want to stop seeing other guys.

    Or the second, is that the part of his brain that recognizes territory is running on full tilt.

    Either way, I think any possibility of moving forward with this guy disappeared sometime ago, and it would be best that you move on.

    And eliminate contact with him.


What Girls Said 2

  • Although hopefully by now you are over this situation I still post anyway. I had nearly an identical situation. I think jealousy usually means they have some sort of attachment and feelings towards you. However just because he has feelings doesn't mean that this is going to turn into a healthy relationship. Usually in my experience men that ask for FWB relationships have serious emotional and commitment issues.

    My FWB was getting jealous and that's where things started getting really weird. The minute I told him I was dating someone else, after all did he really expect me to not look to fill the other parts of my life that pizza and sex couldn't fill? He got mad and eventually pulled back from me. It was a good thing. I know he had feelings for me but the truth is he's f ed up emotionally which is probably one of the reasons we got into the FWB in the first place. We tried to take it to a relationship level but the reality was I don't think he would ever see me as girlfriend material and I would never get over the fact that he asked me to be the hide-a-hoe.

    Guys are also territorial as well especially if their messed up emotionally. As my girlfriend used to say "he's like a dog he just wants to pee on you and mark his territory". It stings when they realize they aren't good enough to keep you but I guess that's what happens when your a jack azz and ask some girl to give you sex and nothing more.

  • My friends with benefits and I are usually too busy to see each other and I'm usually silent and don't text a lot. Anyways he asked me if I were seeing someone, I said no. he asked why am I distant I told him I've just been busy with family matters. He said "yeah right" then apologized and said he admits he gets a little jealous. neither one of us is dating around. I told him I get insecure and just don't like talking then he said... I would never cheat on you... Now I'm confused because we are BWF how do you cheat? And then he asked if I felt a connection with him during sex and I admit I did it was passionate. He admit it too and then he said he thinks he's going crazy Then he said we need to spend a whole weekend together and makeup for not having time together. What does this all mean? I'm confused. is he catching feelings?

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