Guys how would you feel if your girlfriend shared a hotel room/bed with another guy?

[Anonymous]

I started seeing Chris about 3 months ago and we have a good relationship. Next week a few of my friends and I are heading down to LA for 2 nights. This trip was planned about 4 months ago. Now 4 months ago I agreed to share a room with my male friend Anthony , cause everyone else going are couples. What reaction should I expect of my boyfriend Chris when I tell him about the rooming situation?

There is nothing between Anthony and I, but the night I casually met Chris I shared a drunken kiss with Anthony in front of Chris... Chris doesn't really like Ant either...

Updates

+1 y

He kissed me, and we are sharing a room to save money. We are college students.

Updates

+1 y

Thank you everybody for all your responses!

[madhatters4]

I would probably be uncomfortable with it. I am a guy who isn't against a girlfriend having male friends. I'm secure enough with that. but I would be uncomfortable with my gf sharing a room with a guy who she hooked up with... drunk or not. in fact the fact that they were drunk makes it worse cause chances are they'll have booze in LA right? so...

So I would express my concerns... It's not even the sharing of the rooms so much as the hook up. cause even if you aren't in the same room stuff could happy right?

ultimately I'd say go ahead and have fun. and something happens in LA LA land, then I'd just be done with the relationship

[Asker]

Thank you very much, best answer so far! x

[madhatters4]

thanks for MH... hope everything goes smoothly. it's a great opportunity to prove just how trustworthy you can be to your bf (not that you aren't of course). but I imagine if this trip can go smoothly it will help ease his mind and reassure him that he can simply have faith in you

[JackKerouac77]

1) Sharing the bed will not fly, no matter how much innocence you promise.
2) Sleeping in the same room would not be so big of a deal if y'all hadn't kissed before.
3) It wouldn't particularly bother me to go on a trip with another male if I knew that I could trust you, but I'm not sure that would be there after only 3 months.
4) I'm all about saving money, but I'm all about saving face too. I suggest someone sleep on the floor/couch/bring an air mattress.

You've gotten yourself into a tricky situation here.

[Asker]

I understand the issue about the bed, but the kiss was completely innocent, but yeah its a tricky situation :(

[JackKerouac77]

Yeah, there's really no easy way around it.

[Kris85]

Make arrangements to share a room with a girlfriend and Anthony can surf the couch or bed with someone else on the trip. If my boyfriend planned a trip and was going to stay in a room with a girl friend that he kissed, that shit wouldn't fly with me. I'm sure you would think the same if Chris slept in a bed with a girl he kissed before.

[Asker]

Very true, its just a messed up situation! :( thanks a mil x

[Anonymous]

Your boyfriend does not like the guy and he saw you share a kiss with Anthony when you first met... If this situation were in reverse would you be ok with Chris sharing a hotel room with a girl he kissed and that you did not like? The only way I am sharing a room with a grown ass man is if he is a male relative or he is Gay.

[Asker]

Very true, I would not like it, thank you x

[ChaosKilledTheDinos]

That's not going to go over well at all I imagine... I would try harder to get out of that situation than justifying it your boyfriend. It's just not going to look good at all to him.

[Asker]

I know, its a really crappy situation, there is a lot of info I didn't include, but either way im i for an interesting conversation later! :(

[ChaosKilledTheDinos]

Could you possibly include your bf on the trip and switch rooms or something?

[Asker]

He's working :( The main reason e are sharing rooms is to save a few dollars, being poor college students and all!

[ChaosKilledTheDinos]

Are you willing to pass on this trip or do you think there's some chance he might be understanding?

[Asker]

Im not passing on this trip, to much money has been spent on it, and I have been looking forward to it for months. Im just praying for an understanding!

[kambo_trick3y]

So... let me get this straight.

You drunken kiss a guy, and now you're going to share a room with the very same guy that you gave a drunken kiss to.

...

I'm going to ask a very simple, easy to answer question.

If you were Chris, how would you feel about this situation right now?

[Asker]

He kissed me, this was months ago. We are just friends. But I see where you are coming from, I wouldn't feel comfortable is I was Chris. Thank you x

[kambo_trick3y]

NEVER do something to someone that you, yourself, would hate to have done to you.

It's called the Golden rule.

Follow it. It's part of being an adult.

[meatballs21]

I get the feeling Chris is going to be pissed about this.

Thing is, some guys like their girlfriends enough to tolerate her hanging out with guy friends, especially ones she knew from before. Yes, that includes ones he might not like that much.

I'd be uneasy about this if I was him. The drunken kiss was before you and Chris started dating, but even so...

[Asker]

Yeah im gonna tell him in a while, not looking forward to this! x

[TheWiseOwl]

It's unacceptable to be honest, I wouldn't tolerate it and I doubt I'd be around when she got back from her trip.

Chris doesn't like Anthony and saw you kiss him and so when you bring this up shit will hit the fan.

[Asker]

Thanks for your help x

[Anonymous]

I'd say it could have been manageable until I read about him making a move on you. From there, it only proves the point that this particular guy isn't JUST your friend. He can be friends with you, but on some level he has a thing for you. Guys aren't stupid and we know how other guys think. That means that your boyfriend is being asked to not care about a dude (who has attraction to you) to share a room and bed with you.

Doesn't sound like a very reasonable expectation to me.

[Asker]

You have really put this into perspective for me! Thanks! xx

[Anonymous]

Oh hell no!

Let me be clear: sharing a room would be ok; the fact that you'd kiss this guy would irrate me but unless you'd cheated or given me some reason not to trust you I grit my teeth and bear it; but sharing a bed, no girl f that shit...

Call the hotel and find out if they can give you a room with two single beds rather then a double/queen. Many hotels will offer/allow this at no charge, provided all their twin room aren't booked out already.

[Asker]

But your okay with her sharing a room, just not a bed? I can completely respect that, and understand where you are coming from. I have contacted the hotel looking for two single beds but those rooms are booked out :( If worse comes to worse ill sleep on the floor x

[Cnyguy]

I would go and keep the same sleeping arraignments. Might as well sleep with the friend too, because when you get back no matter what you say Chris isn't going to believe you. Enjoy!

[Asker]

haha might as well

[Crazyced]

You can get foldable beds at most hotels, share a room with one of the couples.

If you bf has any backbone and self respect, he won't let that slide.

[Asker]

Thank you very much for your help x

[yaddayaddayadda02]

You would be an ex girlfriend.

[legend59671]

Plain and simple.

[Asker]

I respect your opinion, but me and Ant are just old friends. Sorry im not trying to sound rude or anything! x

[TheWiseOwl]

I'm sorry but friends don't play tonsil hockey with each other.

[yaddayaddayadda02]

You kissed Anthony when you were drunk. You'll presumably be drunk on this trip.

[Asker]

Very true. Thank you (btw he kissed me) x

[yaddayaddayadda02]

You kissed back, or you were sexually assaulted.

[Asker]

It was a surprise of the moment, so I pulled away.

[Crazyced]

He might 'surprise' you at the hotel too.

[tonicman]

In all honesty, I wouldn't be too comfortable knowing that you've already kissed him, drunken or not.

[Asker]

Thank you for your help x

[Error_204]

It's a good thing you didn't bring this up 90 days ago. That would have been like... smart.

[Asker]

He has known about this trip since we started dating, it only hit me earlier that he must not realise im sharing a room with Ant... if so I would have expected him to say something...

[Error_204]

Well just tell him now.

[Lew5505]

I would drop you like a hot plate and never speak to you again...

[Asker]

just because im sharing a room with a friend?

[Lew5505]

Women? think of the message you're sending... duh...

[BertMacklinFBI]

best to get separate rooms if you can lol. if not then make sure Anthony is riding the couch.

[Asker]

haha yeah, see we are all college students with little money to our names, just trying to save a few dollars!

[badger25]

yeah you can't expect him to be comfortable with it

[Asker]

Yeah I know :/ Thank you x

[Averageusername]

Bitch you crazy if you think he should be ok with that

[Asker]

I know, tonight is not going to go down well...

[Imtheone88]

i wouldn't feel anything because you'd be history...

[Zango91]

You'll just have to find Anthony a new room mate. And you can bring Chris with you.

[Asker]

Chris is working that weekend, and I don't want to leave Ant on his own

[Zango91]

This is exactly why most relationships fail. :) Ant may be your close friend, but your relationship won't be the same with Chris after you have spend a night with Ant. Be ready to face a shitstorm :) Good Luck.

[Klaatu51]

personaly i'd be like... "ok fine"

[Asker]

because you trust her, and respect her long term friendship? Im just curious x

[Klaatu51]

nope because it's out of my business LOL

[Asker]

haha I like you! Thanks x

[Kshppatel]

Expect him to break up with you immediately because thats what I would do.

[Asker]

Just for sharing a room with a friend?

[Kshppatel]

Lol at "friend." A "friend" that kissed you. I hope for his sake that you reward his faith in you, I really do. What do you value more? Your "friendship" with Anthony, or your relationship with Chris? One of my friends was in a similar situation to your boyfriends'. You want to know what happened? She cheated on him. He chose to believe her that nothing happened and took her back. She continued cheating on him until I exposed her.

[Asker]

honestly I value my friendship with Ant more, I have know him longer and we have a stronger history. He is one of my good mates. I have no intention of cheating on Chris, or anyone. Im not that type of person, I would break up with someone before getting with someone else

[Kshppatel]

If that is true then its not fair to string along Chris like you are doing. I'm not saying you're gonna cheat but if it happens I feel like you aren't going to feel that bad about it because you aren't fully invested in the relationship.

[Asker]

Very true, thank you x

[Keyspirits]

This fragile little heart of mine will forever remain unease 😷

[Asker]

:O :( I know its a sticky situation, im really dreading tell him, but I have no intentions of hurting him

[Anonymous]

I would say have fun. I'm going away for the weekend and I'm sharing a room with a female. Let that sink in and see how you fee.

[Asker]

but what is your relationship with the female? If you were good friends, and good friends only, like I am with Anthony, then I wouldn't have a problem

[Opinion Owner]

How about if it was an ex hookup. Because basically that is what you two are. He doesn't have any boundaries if he would kiss you. Why aren't you inviting Chris

[Asker]

He's not my ex! We just shared a drunken kiss and a cuddle one night, it didn't mean anything. Chris is working that weekend :(

[rthomas43]

Maybe you can date Anthony after Chris dumps you.

[Asker]

I love him as a friend, but he is too much of a player for me!

[rthomas43]

You missed the point. If Chris had any self respect, he'll either not let this go down (assuming you tell him of the situation), or he'll dump you.

[rthomas43]

You'd be better off backing out of the trip. I'd be pretty fucking offended if a girlfriend even asked what I'd think of a situation like this.

[Asker]

Im not backing out on the grounds that I have put a lot of money into this and have been looking forward to it for months. As for the rooming problem, I realise it is a crappy situation, but I am going to try and sort it out before anything is mentioned to Chris.

[rthomas43]

Well, best of luck then salvaging your relationship.

[Asker]

Its a few week old relationship, my relationship with Ant has been much longer. At this moment I would pick my friend first on the grounds of our history. Yeah i'd be upset if Chris broke up with me, but it would not be the be all and end all.

[rthomas43]

That's a terrific attitude to have.

[Asker]

Its a realistic one

[Foreverconfused21]

Sounds like chris found a winner :D

[Anonymous]

it is impossible for me! if he loves you he won't permission

[Asker]

I dont need his permission to do anything

[Opinion Owner]

Because you are not together really... the person jealouses who falls in love.. if he gives permission he does not love you. if I was him I get angry and sad

[Asker]

I see where you are coming from. Thank you x

[Opinion Owner]

Are you gonna stay with another boy? have you decided yet

[Asker]

It is a difficult situation. I kinda have to stay with him. It is very complicated and I have not given all the information :(

[Opinion Owner]

You must not do that... I think is very bad for your relationship

[Asker]

I know :( Im trying to fix it x

[Opinion Owner]

Is that impossible you could stay another room or stay witf girls? and do you think the boys who is stay with you make something to you at night

[pharaoh_lover48118]

this will mean that she is my ex now

[Asker]

Just for sharing a room with an old friend?

[pharaoh_lover48118]

look revers this situation and see how it comes your 3 months boyfriend is sharing a room with his female friend for 2 nights in a trip that every one else is a couple and see what kind of thoughts you will make

[Asker]

True, thank you

[pharaoh_lover48118]

you are more than welcome :D ;)

[badapple3201]

I think that would be pretty hot and intense actually

[SurströmmingLover]

This other guy would now be in the hospital...

[Asker]

But nothing has ever happened, we are honestly just friends. I've been friends with Anthony a lot longer than being in a relationship with Chris. Thanks for you help x

[Kyndra]

Kissing is something :/

[IAmCluelessToo]

I think Chris should take Ant's ticket

[Asker]

I couldn't do that, Ant was one of the originals going (trip was originally planned 6 months ago, I joined like 4/5 months ago). Thanks for your opinion x

[IAmCluelessToo]

Who takes 6 months to plan a 2 night trip?

[Asker]

We are heading to a concert, we bought the tickets six months ago