Me and my ex girlfriend just got in a fight, and she said she never wants to talk to me again?

[Anonymous]

the break up was her fault, she couldn't handle the distance, and immediately moved on to another guy and I was heartbroken, we kept in contact for awhile but just recently we got in a huge fight and she said she doesn't want to talk to me anymore, if I don't contact her her for awhile is there a good chance she will start talking to me? and maybe even want to get back together, because honestly when I was here everything was great.

[Tigerlily]

Let's have this from the other side. My ex boyfriend broke up with me last summer, saying he just wanted to be friends, but as soon as I started dating someone else he flipped at me like I'd done something wrong, so I told him never to talk to me again. After all, why should I be friends with someone like that? I don't know about your ex, but when I said it, I meant it. I have no wishes to talk to my ex again, and most definitely don't want to get back with him. You got 3 possible options that I can think of:

1) She meant it. If you don't contact her for a while, she's not going to contact you, she'll just get on with her life. If you do contact her, she'll be annoyed and ignore you - you're disrespecting her wishes and harassing her. You gotta move on. There are plenty of other girls you might get on with.

2) She didn't mean it. If you don't contact her for a while she still won't get back to you, because her pride doesn't permit. If you do contact her she may act like she doesn't want to talk to you but will give in eventually. Rule of 3 here - if you try 3 times and she still doesn't give in, it's more likely to be option 1. Leave her be and find someone more suited.

3) She didn't mean it. If you don't contact her she will get back to you, apologise, start talking to you. As for getting back together, it happens sometimes but it sounds like she wants to see this new guy. Again - best to find someone else.

What do you mean by the breakup being 'her fault'? Either she broke up with you because she felt something was off (ie not her fault) or you broke up with her because you felt something was off (ie not her fault). Try not to play the blame game. You may be hurt but saying everything is her fault isn't going to help you get her back.

[Asker]

Alright ill give you some background, we dated for 7 months and everything was perfect, we fought maybe 2 times and I loved evvery minute, last fall I had to leave for college and she was still a senior in high school. she told me everything was going to be ok and she loved me, but she started acting different and she was like annoyed with me, so I came home one weekend to talk about stuff, and we got in a fight and ended up breaking up, she told me it wasn't permanent and she still loved me.......

[Asker]

But then 2 weeks later she was making out with another guy, she told me it was a drunk thing and I stupidly believed her, now she's dating this guy, and doesn't want me in her life at all, I'm having a hard time moving on and I just don't understand who this person is now, because she's not the girl I fell in love with, I kno everyone says just move on, but its easier said than done

[Tigerlily]

Alright fair enough. But that's still not her 'fault,' it's her choice.

You've said the crucial part though - she's not the same person anymore. I had the same problem with the ex above. For the last few months of our relationship he acted like a complete asshole to me and I put up with it because I couldn't accept that he'd changed. The problem here is that even if you were to get back with her, she still wouldn't be the same person. Also, this isn't your fault, but it's possible that she

[Tigerlily]

Still loves you but wants to be with someone she can see every weekend or every day or whatever. Maybe it'd just hurt for you to be so far away, so she wants to remove herself from you entirely. If that's the case then I guess she doesn't know what she wants and you gotta leave her to figure it out... otherwise she's just being fickle and you're better ff finding someone else anyway. It hurts and it takes time, but keep telling yourself you CAN get over her, and eventually you will.

[Asker]

Ur right, this whole thing just sucks tho.....but thanks for ur advice

[Regularguy]

Insightful answers as usual Tigerlily!

[Tigerlily]

Yeah it does, but unfortunately all you can do is surround yourself with good people (friends & family), have some time to yourself, get used to being without her... and eventually the feeling will pass.

Hehe thanks Regularguy =]

[ashleybaby]

didnt you say she had a new guy? and doesn't it bother you she broke up with you? adn that if you "dont contact her for a while" she's not trying to talk to you either? If I was with someone who broke up with me, immediately got a new girlfriend to replace me, and didn't want to talk to me I would NOT talk to him at all. Do what she did and start dating a new girl and put this one behind you. She's your ex for a reason. if it really was great like you say Ya'll would still be together and she wouldn't be dating someone else. good luck with that. Don't keep your hopes up for this one sound like girlfriend moved on.

[Asker]

Well I posted this a while ago, and we have been broken up for 5 months, so I don't know its kinda getting easier but its still hard. I can't move on I don't know what's wrong with me. she's been dating this other guy for awhile now, I realize its over and chances of us getting back together are not good, but for some reason I'm still stuck in this.

[viva100]

I think you need to give her time and when she'll cool off she may get in touch with you again.

Us women don't take long to contact an ex when we feel down or empty!

Maybe now she's busy with him, but I think that the first time something sad happens between them she'll get in touch with you. Maybe you'll be a replacement for her, or maybe she'll realise that she cares about you. Just give time.

[viva100]

Or maybe she realised that she prefers being with someone she can see every day. If real feelings for you are in place she'll miss you and will get in touch with you again.

[Asker]

Thanks for ur advice, its good to hear a girl say that, but I don't know I mean I'm hoping she realizes stuff and comes back to me but I don't know at the same time if her feelings could change that quickly and she go with another guy I don't know I just wish I knew what was going to happen, or if I should just move on......

[hopontwofeet]

Dude it's sh*t but stats show that men suffer more from a break up than women do! Fact I'm afraid, no matter who instigates the break up Secondly you were going out for 7 months that's too long for somone of your age group. BEING YOUNG IS ABOUT EXPERIENCING NEW THINGS! now it's not going to be easy to get over her because you let yourself get caught up in things for so long. believe me dude I have the exact same sob story you have, only diffence is that was 7 years ago, I got over her and went out and had a lot of fun with differnet girls to find out what I liked, I wasn't a slut, they were relationships but I wasn't tied down and I'm still friends with most of the women I dated during that time, thay were all doing it for the same reason I was; to learn and have fun. Now 7 years later I'm in the longest relationship I've ever been in nearly 2 years now and I see no signs of getting sick of it, everyday I see her I find new things I love about her, we both go out now and have fun together but only because we both went out and experimented when we were younger we didn't go out looking for relationships relationships just happen if it's right it's right. anyway she sounds like a scanky little ho so stay well clear, if you've learned one thing form this it should be that you are too good for her!

[Tweb84]

Dude it sucks but let her go or you are going to end up crushed. Ok this is a women that can't handle distance? It's normally us to come up with a lame excuse like that. Not to be harsh but I have been in your shoes that's all so I get a litle heated at the subject. Don't let someone walk all over your feelings, go out and get all up on some other dude and you sit around waiting on her as you wipe tears away. Why do that to yourself ? You can't love anyone whole heartedly unless you love yourself first, I know that sounds stupid and unhelpfull but its true! How old is she? For some reason with me and in my opinion girls from like 16 to 22 have butt for brains all they do is cry about men being pigs and sex hungry all the time but they will have a guy that cares about them and treat them good and they sit there and fantasize about the asswholes! The guy they know only wants a quick relief and he's on his way to the next dumb dumb that will let him crawl in there bed. It's just how it works. The assholes ruin it for everyone else. Maybe in your case I'm wrong but it sounds like the classic case of a young women who doesn't know what she wants and is willing to hurt people to find out. KEEP AWAY FROM HER. The pain will stop and maybe you will meet someone that won't treat you that way.

[Asker]

No dude ur exactly right, and it just sucks knowing that she's doing the stuff that me and her did with this other guy, this other kid is a douche bag, and I'm not trying to make myself sound so great,but he will never treat her the way I did I know this for a fact, but I do have to move on, but at the same time part of me still hopes she will come back, idk, but ur right and thanks for ur advice

[notorious_eagle]

Dude think of it as this way; you have a huge ocean out there and there are millions of beautiful single girls in that ocean. Now its upto you which ever one you want to choose, she is not the only girl in this world. I don't even know why would you want to keep contact with her even after breaking up and especially if she was the one who wanted to break up with you. Sure if she messages you or calls you than be nice to her but don't call or message her back. My advice, grow a pair of balls and go out and meet other women because she isn't the only girl in the world.

[Regularguy]

Honestly if I told someone to never contact me again, it's really for their own good and mine too. Because if they did I would probably say some very mean things to them such as what part of don't ever contact me again don't you understand, etc. But some people say it and don't mean it in the heat of an argument. I mean it in all my cases.

Also you didn't need to know that she moved on to another. That's really none of your business and it's not really good characteristic of her to tell you that. I don't go around telling my ex who I'm dating right after them. Besides, why would you want to be with someone who's already moved on to another guy? She clearly broke up with you to be with him.

[timeiskey]

Man the same thing is happening to me right now...let me tell you what is going on in my situation...she broke up with me, I think she just wanted to find somthing new... but I showed her I love and cared about her more than anything... she says I'm perfect and she wants to spend her life with me and what not, but anyways she went out and found a new guy...that lasted a couple months then she was calling me after no contact with her...then we got in a huge fight and she said she didn't care anymore, of course she said it out of anger, because she texted me ater and called me but I havnt talked to her...give her time to think about what she has done man...cause she may not see it right away but when she realizes thing she will contact u...just give it time...in the mean time you should be going out doing your own things to keep ur mind off talkin to her...its hard, trust me, but you want her to come back to you...

[viva100]

Instead I would rather advice to keep away from her, she should be the one coming close to you and if she doesn't then let maybe 3 weeks pass and then you can contact her. Give her time to think! Maybe in those 3 weeks she'll have opportunities to think about everything that happened.

[gibrat15]

i think that she just said that she didn't wanted to talk to you was probably because she was mad and when people are mad they say stupid things. if you really like her or love her, you should really try talking to her. even though she said she didn't wanted to talk to you ever again. good luck. hope you get her back.

[Asker]

But I mean she's with another guy now, she's not gonna leave him for me I don't know wats the point of talking to her when they are gonna b together, I don't know I can't explain it I can't be just friends with her, it hurts too much, that's why I thought maybe if they break up or something she will come back to me but I don't know fml

[juicyfruit_87]

I'm sure this hurts very much right now, but just remember- "this too shall pass". If you love her you will want her to be happy. I'd give her distance... this doesn't mean you have to move on, it just means you should let things rest. It can't hurt forever.

[SEN10R]

Well it might seem like she used the long distance thing to break up, but I could be wrong. But it looks like she just wants to be friens and I wouldn't try going after someone who only wants to be friends. The long distance relationship is tough and both the guy and the girl but there has to be an understanding between the Long distance relationship also tests the patience and love the boy and the girl have for each other. But it seems like space would be the best thing for you guys

[h2opologirl]

Well first of all maybe just give her time, she's probably stressed about the whole distance thing. She could start talking to you first it might take a while a week a month who knows but it'll hit her that she actually misses you. or maybe even if she doesn't want to be in a realtioinship with you she just wants to keep a good friendship with you. Maybe later on it'll work out.

[Deathecutioner]

first off: break up are never just one persons fault. It's both peoples in the relationship. Secondly if you give her some space there's a good chance you'll start talking again.

[sumina7]

Is she the only girl in the world?

She has already moved on to another guy. It is futile to wait for her. Not worth it.

[amber505]

Just try to move on and if she decides she wants to talk to you again, she will.

[mikkie180]

As much as it hurts, sounds like it is time to move on with your life, she's with someone else.

[Anonymous]

I think that you need to live her a little why. After that she might cool down and come to you.