Why would a one night stand add you on FB? What does he want from me?

[Anonymous]

We been talking to each other for a year now, but not constantly, probably once every 1-2 months and 4 months after we started talking online, i finally agreed to meet him, but we arranged to meet just for sex, like he never promised anything else because the conversations were mostly sexual. So, we met and he created such a great impression, i expected a lot worse, like a typical fuckboy or someone lame in bed, but he was just incredible. He behaved like a gentleman and we talked to each other a lot about personal issues and it felt like we have known each other for long time as we discussed some grown-up subjects. The sex was amazing, he did everything in bed he can to satisfy me and everything that I told him i like in bed and he went down me way too many times (even my ex didn't do as much) and he made me orgasms as many times as he could. Then he paid for my taxi and i left and he said we shall do this again soon. He has contacted me couple of times in the past to meet up again, but i was either abroad on holidays or I was playing hard to get so i turned him down a few times, i asked him a few times as well, but he said he was busy with work. Technically we never met since October last year. He kind of still keep in touch with me, like he added me on LinkedIn 2 months ago, no idea how he found out about my surname, he must have stalked the shit out of me, but he didn't talk to me. Then, a week ago, out of nowhere he added me on FB and we had 0 matual friends and i confronted him and i asked him why is he adding me on fb and i called him a stalker (as a joke) cause i never told him my surname, but he said that he added me on FB by accident and i was like yes sure. The question is, i don't know what does he want from me, clearly its not sex, because we are not talking about this and conversations are not sexual, but also we don't keep a regular contact with each other and last time we spoke about careers in banking. I am really confused. does he want to date me?

[KaseyRouqe]

Either he wants more sex or he's actually interested in you as a person. In my opinion, I wouldn't add a one night stand as a friend on FB, if you want a relationship. But if you really like him, just ask him what he wants from you.

[Asker]

i guess he is interested because he hasn't asked to meet up for sex since last year and this year we talked about careers and more important stuff a few times. i just can't imagine that a one night stand would add me on FB after 6 months of not having sex and especially after i cut him off. i think he is curious about me and my life style because i am also posting photos. But i need to be cautious what i post from now on because i feel like he is watching me. Also, i confronted him on why he is adding me on FB and he said it was by accident, clearly not cause we have no mutual friends and he must have searched for my name. He is not talking to me i don't really know if i should really ask him what he wants from me because he doesn't even have the balls to admit that he stalked me on FB

[KaseyRouqe]

It's just a matter of whether you like him or not. I'd still confront him, but don't make him feel uncomfortable about it if you want him to be honest. You should also be honest with your feelings when you talk to him. If you feel like he's being creepy or responds aggressively, let him know you don't put up with stuff like that and unfriend him and block him.

[Asker]

I honestly really really like him, I kept thinking about him every day since we met and i have stalked him many times on FB and i feel like he was doing the same, until he added me and confirmed that. I like the fact that he reached out for me to find me and add me rather than me, because i wasn't going to do it. I don't really know if he likes me as much as I do, because i see him as a boyfriend material. That's why i am scared to open up to him because i am not even sure if he likes me as much as I do. He is very soft spoken and non-confrontatial type of guy, thats why when i asked him why he added me, he said it was by accident. He wouldn't admit the fact that he added me cause he wants to get to know me. I don't think its about sex because during 1 year of knowing each other we had sex only once and he did everything in bed to satisfy me and we shared a lot of personal stories when we met and talked. Shall i wait for him to contact me or what? I really don't know how to approach hi

[KaseyRouqe]

I always say that you'll never know unless you ask. Do you prefer keeping your feelings bottled up? I think it's best to be honest, the worst that can happen is a small rejection. You gotta choose what you prefer. Keep quiet and never know or just lay it out and either be shot down and be relieved, and don't forget the possibility that he feels the same as you. I think it's the latter, he probably denied adding you on purpose because he's scared of what you might think.

[Asker]

Shall i confront him online or ask to be meet, although it would be a bit awkward because we haven't seen each other for 7 months already. I could confront him online and send him a long messages explaining my feelings and how much i like him, i means whats the worst that could happen really? you are right a little rejection won't hurt and its his loss anyway. I would rather have the answers because we have known each other for almost a year and him adding me on social media- Linked In and Facebook, just makes me wanna confront him even more. I don't know if I am being absolutely delusional and i am totally misinterpreting the salutation- like he could add me for other sinister reasons- like stalk me or just want more sex. I wish i was more sure in his intentions in order to understand what he sees me at. Maybe i should wait for a little bit more until he is fully comfortable to open up? Or shall i just send him a message asking about how he feels about me and explain how i feel too?

[Asker]

sorry i meant the situation*

[KaseyRouqe]

Just do what's more comfortable for you. If it were me I'd start with a few conversations online before meeting him face to face.

[redxiii74]

ya your reading way to much into it. Dont add him

[Asker]

I already accepted his request, why wouldn't i?

[redxiii74]

you already slept with him no sense in giving him any more info on your life. some guys are just ass holes and wanna have info over their partners so its just not worth the chance

[Asker]

not really i never had a one night stand adding me on fb, some even deleted me or blocked me. he must be interested in more if he added me on fb because that way i can see all his photos and info. i think he is showing me that he is interested indirectly

[redxiii74]

I admire your positive attitude. Im more jaded. I'm cool with the sex part, just not letting him into your life

[Asker]

well thats because i have actually met him and because i see good in him. and of course cause i really like him also,, but i could be completely delusional and wrong about this, i just never came across someone like him before in my life