Are you the jealous & possessive type of person?

[Kimmu88]

Are you Jealous or Possessive person? If not what makes you Jealous or Possessive towards your significant other?

[D_Bone_Steak]

This question is too subjective. I need to specify what "too" possessive or jealous is. Eff it, I'll try to wing this...

If being too possessive or jealous is agreeing with someone not to do A, B, or C... adhering to this verbal agreement (written if married) and then find yourself being that one in a one sided deal >>guess what<<...

There is a reason they call it cheating, them cheaters, and describe themselves as feeling cheated.

Now with all that said, if you feel possessive and jealous I doubt it's for no good reason... but if you don't leave that person, no good reasons become reasons eventually.

Be strong on your own until you find someone else that can do the same... you'll be made for each other and respectful of each other... instead of trying to cheat or not get cheated.

[Kimmu88]

Why the hell are you telling this shit? I just asked a damn question. No one asked you for the damn explanation. Each to their own. Don't try to act too smart!!!

[D_Bone_Steak]

My answer may of hurt your brain... but it turned out to be a mho answer didn't it.

[Robsinsf53]

I'm not and since my divorce, I've also retired. That's become a problem now in the dating game. My last lady friend "SUGGESTED" that I wear a pager so when she's at work, I can call her right back! If you think she had a problem I dated a women for two months and while eating dinner she just said "I'm going to retire too". I said do you have enough saved & enough years and she got pissed off. She was already moving in?

[Robsinsf53]

and I'm sure as fuck glad I had no problems with the meanings! lmfao.!

[Kimmu88]

So fast want to move in for what?

[Robsinsf53]

Save money? Have me pay for everything? I have been enjoying my living alone plus it looked like it could be a fatal attraction type of a deal, lol.

[Robsinsf53]

Kimmu88, I like your comment "try not to let them see it, or MAY see it as sign of weakness." But I think you could have said "will use it". Its in our human nature to grab the upper hand when available.

[Kimmu88]

Yes but weakness is more fatal. Anyone can use that against us. ANYONE!!!

[Kimmu88]

As a Woman, I don't like it when other women try to live with a man just so that he can support her. That's screwed up!!!

[Robsinsf53]

Agree. Weakness is like the worst you can show a person. They will only pounce on you and not let go. As for living with someone to get a free ride is just another form of prostitution. I've got to know a woman at least a year or two to even think about living with someone.

[Kimmu88]

I will never live with a man, unless he's my HUSBAND!!!

[Robsinsf53]

I'm glad to hear that. I did live with mine for 6 months before we were married. My daughter wanted my opinion on this a couple years back & she is now married, pregnant and still very much my "little girl". Well it was tough for me to tell my opinion on something that I did myself and don't want her to do. She did take my advice, married a good dude who is a fireman and life is good, lmao. I'm happy with your decision, like it matters, but yeah if he's good enough to live with you, then you're most certainly deserving of a rock on your finger.

[Kimmu88]

Thank you. I'm an Indian Woman. In Indian Culture & Traditions an unmarried woman lives with her family & this is until she is married. Tho many Indians don't always follow this. I follow this because I have my beliefs. I do not believe that there is a "need" for me to live with a man before marriage. At the end of the day, the Woman's name & reputation is on the line. I do not want to tell my future husband that "I was living with someone, had a live-in relationship", what will he think of me? We say we are open minded but in truth most of us are NOT Open Minded.

[Robsinsf53]

I understand what you mean. I know your Celebesy until marriage is very important in your culture too. I like the way your culture hasn't changed too much as far as press marital sex. Its nice to see.

[Robsinsf53]

"pre-marital"

[Kimmu88]

Not interested. Sex is a part of life not life itself. Most men nowadays just want sex. That's all the want. Very few men will be happy & respect Woman's choice/wish to not have pre-marital. Most of the time they will threaten, blackmail, force, molest or even rape just to get sex (from their partners). Nowadays having pre-marital is too common. I want a man that will RESPECT my wishes to not have it before marriage. For me, I would rather have an actual emotional connection with someone before ever thinking of sleeping with them.

[Robsinsf53]

And I commend you for that. Virginity is a dying thing. It was widely discussed when I was in Jr. high in 1976. If someone got laid the first question was always "was she a virgin".

[Kimmu88]

I'm not a Virgin. I was raped. So that's another story for another day. I don't feel that sex is important at all. It's a part of life. Not like itself. I would rather if I have an actual connection with him.

[existing_not_living]

Maybe a tad bit possessive, but I'm not a jealous girlfriend. To put it this way: I'm not worried or scared that my boyfriend would leave me for someone "prettier" or funnier or overall better than me. I'm worried or scared that he'll leave me period. It's one of my good qualities as a girlfriend. I don't get jealous about my man having friends that are girls or shit.
I have a lot of insecurities, but being afraid of losing my boyfriend to another girl is not one of them.

[Leandri]

I would say I am more territorial, though my fiance once said that I am possessive

[Kimmu88]

Each person have their own view on themselves.

[Leandri]

True yeah

[Schrodingerscat]

I am possessive person. And I don;t know why I am that way lol

[Kimmu88]

Trust issues maybe?

[cinderelli]

we all are to some extent whether we say it or not..

[Avneo]

Yes I'm jealous and very possessive man, I don't like if some guy touches my love (so) here and there, I know guys, on the name of friendship they take full advantage. I want my so mine for everything. And I wanna grabs and hug her in a way to absorbe her in me, my love is very intense. ;-)

[Kimmu88]

Damn, I just got turned on. Why I don't know. Yeah it is true that guys use the word "friend" & try shit with girls.

[Avneo]

Yep sweety that's the brutal fact, and I'm glad to made you feel good, you are really a sweet girl :-)

[Kimmu88]

Thank you😊❤️❤️!!!

[Avneo]

You are always welcome hun :-) 😍

[Kimmu88]

😊😊

[Avneo]

Oh thank you B-)

[Kimmu88]

😊❤️

[Avneo]

👉👍👌<3

[O3america]

Jealousy and possessiveness are manifestations of one's own insecurities. The behavior is usually portrayed by an individual that has self-esteem issues and has a hard time comprehending why someone would be faithful to them.

[Kimmu88]

I don't need a damn explanation about what I asked. Seriously do not act too smart about teaching me things. Asshole answer the question do not even try to be a bloody smart ass. Seriously pisses me off!!!

[Kamulus]

ouch I think you are overreacting.

[ShortCircuit]

Yeah, I am. Date me or don't, but to those reading this, if you came to preach "insecurity":
https://i.imgur.com/2a6bPqU.gif

[Nephilim000]

I have been. I'd like to think I've grown past that. I have gotten jealous when I don't get to spend time q
with a significant other while they are spending time with others

[Kimmu88]

Maybe next time it's best to talk to your partner about it. It may help.

[Nephilim000]

oh that is totally in the past and resolved I'm just being honest about having suffered from things like jealousy in the past

[Kimmu88]

Would you do it in the future again?

[Nephilim000]

I hope not. I'd like to think i have grown as a person

[Kimmu88]

Hope so too.

[Nephilim000]

thanks. I think part of it though is being with someone who cares about you too. or in my case not being with someone so selfish

[Kimmu88]

I hate selfish people.

[Nephilim000]

they do suck

[Nephilim000]

I was once with a girl who threw me a surprise party but neglected to arrange for my arrival so she turned it into a party for her band. My best friend called her that night and she said we could come hang out if we wanted. I felt a bit hurt and quite frankly it actually pissed me off. I'd like to grow to the point where such things don't bother me. but for now I'm only human and I have limits to what I am willing to put up with

[Kimmu88]

Okay first of all she's a bitch to even do that. You are the guest & if it was a party for you then YOU should have been invited. How is it that the most important person failed to show up because you "forgot" that person & then make it into your party? That's fucked up!!!

[Nephilim000]

yeah she kinda sucked. or at least I wasn't really as important to her as she led me to believe. and I am ok with that. but i think when you love someone you make the effort. I think that she believed that I would love her no matter what so she could do whatever she wanted.

[Nephilim000]

same girl and I had planned to go to a conference together becauae we hadn't seen each other for a few months. so that morning i went to meet the bus and then she arrived and came running to me and we hugged and she asked me if she could hang out with all these other pros because she hadn't seen them all summer. I said yeah sure. it seemed kinda petty and childish to say no. but yeah i was a bit jealous. we did talk about it and she made it up to me by going on a canoe trip with me. but that night at dinner some jerk horned in on our time. eventually you just get tired of feeling your not even on the list of priorities ya know

[Kimmu88]

Honey, when a girl does what she did, you were never on her list. Best to dump that girl. I honestly think she's a Bitch. Me being a girl I hate insulting other girls/women but that ones behaviour is repulsive!!! Too mean & hurtful.

[Nephilim000]

oh we're totally done. although I hear she asks about me. and her father and I are close. I have written it off as an educational experience. I hope she wasn't being a bitch on purpose
I'm hoping she's just immature. but it's not my problem anymore. but touching on the original subject of this question while i don't like feeling jealous or possessive sometimes people stir up those feelings in you. although in the future i will try to avoid such women. hopefully

[Kimmu88]

Let me tell you one thing about Women that you MUST understand, when a woman behaves like that, she KNEW EXACTLY WHAT SHE WAS DOING!!! Most people know exactly what they are doing!!! She just didn't expect you to dump her. It was a blow to her ego. Glad you dumped her!!!

[Nephilim000]

you're right. so i guess I'd like to hope then that her actions weren't out of malice but out of selfishness. it's not much better but whatever. I don't know how much of a blow it could have been to her ego. while i don't think I have had a cheerleader as enthusiastic about me as her. she had plenty of fans too. I have heard that she has missed me from time to time and that has given her grief. but while there were some good times I don't think it was worth the heartache. hopefully never again

[Kimmu88]

She's manipulative as well I see. She's telling people she misses you, hoping that you will change your mind & come back to her. Simple logic. If she really had any "genuine" feelings or love for you, she wouldn't have treated you like shit. She's just one of those girls who's a Genuine Bitch. I hate calling her that but her behaviour is repulsive. Also she's a Cheerleader? It's so obvious. She's pretty, beautiful & almost always gets what she wants because of her beauty/body or the attention she gets. She's been getting so much attention that even if she behaved badly people mostly ignored it & accepted it.

[Nephilim000]

By cheerleader i mean often when I met people who ran in the same circles they would always say they had heard goos things about me from her. yeah she is pretty and gets her way. I don't think many other guys have gotten close enough to experience anything but the most superficial behavior from her and apparently. it is much easier to be living in little bursts than in a prolonged relationship. I actually did date a professional cheerleader and was treated way better.

[Kimmu88]

Sometimes we may never know what we get until get to know them. People wear many masks. We may never know which one we get.

[Nephilim000]

That's is very true. although I have found I'd ya look carefully there are clues

[Kimmu88]

👌🏾😊

[Justinaveragedude]

I am not possessive, but jealousy comes from lack of trust. If I can't trust you, the relationship won't last much longer.

[Kimmu88]

Have you felt such emotions to your partner?

[Justinaveragedude]

I had a relationship where I started to have trust issues which I was right to have. She cheated and the relationship ended.

[Kimmu88]

Instincts/suspicion always save us!!!

[MrSelfless]

I am very possessive and jealous. I think its due to fear of losing significant other.

[Kimmu88]

Extremely accurate reason. But best thing to do is to make sure you never show them that you age Jealous or Possessive as they may see it as s weakness.

[MrSelfless]

Thanks , I will remember this thanks.

[Kimmu88]

Welcome.

[geonator]

This relationship is North Korea and I'm Kim Jong Un. I ain't letting her out of here to potentially find the rest of the world 😎

[clampfan101]

I've no experience, but I doubt I would be with my trust in people being so strong.

[yyooggeesshh]

possessive and jealous is different thing. possessive concern caring. jelous means don't like

[alice55]

I'm possessive not so much jealous.

[Kimmu88]

Okay.

[FýrdracaDócincel]

Yes I am.

[Kimmu88]

Why so?

[FýrdracaDócincel]

Because when you're dating me, you belong to me.

[Kimmu88]

That's not fully acceptable. With that mentality of yours women would leave you. No one belongs to anyone. Dating doesn't mean one is another persons. You may just be an option not a choice. Same goes for girls who are dating guys too. Just be cool & chill. You don't want to chase your partner away.

[FýrdracaDócincel]

Some of the girls I've been with in the past loved that mindset. So experience tells me otherwise

[Kimmu88]

As long as you are not too possessive or too jealous it's acceptable. The way you put it at first seemed psychotic. Sad but true. So how's your current relationship status?

[FýrdracaDócincel]

Well I get that. It's to be expected that it would be taken that way.
And to answer your question, chaotic.

[Kimmu88]

Why? What happened?

[FýrdracaDócincel]

It's a crappy combination of:

1.) Getting pretty lonely due to prior breakup.

2.) Being in contact with a few girls who I do feel a TINY bit of chemistry with.

and

3.) Not feeling ready for, or capable of, a relationship at present (partially due to the previous two reasons).

[Kimmu88]

You need to evaluate yourself before going into a relationship. Also start analysing the both previous relationships. It may be you or your exes. Do that then think of you are really or genuinely prepared to go into another new relationship or not. Also don't date more than 1 girl at time.

[FýrdracaDócincel]

I think you may have read wrong. I said "partially due to the previous two REASONS" not "partially due to the previous two relationships."

And no, I'm definitely not dating multiple at once.

[Kimmu88]

Partially or fully it's the same. Still has some importance. Excuse me about the dating part.

[momo770]

no, I control nothing and lno one

[3timesaday]

Yeah :(

[Kimmu88]

Why so?

[3timesaday]

I've bin cheated on/hurt a bunch so I get defensive easily I guess I'm expecting to get hurt now. Somthing I gotta deal with

[Kimmu88]

Those are the types of women you go for. I mean, let me guess (I'm just guessing) that your exes are hot & beautiful?

[3timesaday]

A few were hot but im not interested in Barbie high maintenance girls anymore I want a solid chick in my life but all the bad once left some baggage, my own fault i guess for not understanding

[Kimmu88]

Try to go out of your comfort zone. It's your fault in a way, go for a Plus Size girl or something. You will find a good girl.

[ploverean]

mostly positive