Am I too lenient on my boyfriend?

[DanielleMarie98]

I’m a good hearted person and I want to look out for friends, family and people in general. For my boyfriend’s birthday I bought him $400 shoes that he wanted and after I did that for him he stared at every girl that walked past us in a restaurant. I watched him the whole time and I asked him why he was looking at EVERY girl that passed by and he told me that if he liked what he saw he’s gonna look. My feelings were hurt that night, he usually pays for our food but I told him that I would do it. During the ride home he told me that I was always in his business, which I never am. If I see him texting I always ask him who he’s talking too but I’m never being a bitch about it or anything. I don’t understand why he has moods where he acts like he doesn’t care, whenever he’s down I’m always there for him and whenever he wants something I break my neck to get it for him. Am I doing something wrong?

[JhonnyMA]

I know girls don't like it, but looking is normal, if he does nothing but look, he don't flirt, he don't do anything to cal other girls attention, you shouldn't be mad, he is with you he, prefers you than these other girls he looks at... In relationship you need to be equals, if he don't ask who you're texting then try to do it for him if he never broke your confidence there is no need to be like this, but you have to be equals if he looks to other pretty girls in the street, that mean you can do the same and he don't have the right to complain...

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

You're spoiling him too much and your a great girlfriend that many men wish they had. It's his actions he needs to change and he should worship the ground you walk on. Any girl treats me good i do the same in return
maybe your too nice to him and he's taking a advantage of your kindness.
Yes you are too lenient with him and he's taking you for granted and
it's sad to see when guys do these things with girls and it's not fair to you.

[kaylaS91]

The only thing you're doing wrong (based off of what you wrote up there) is acting like his sugar-momma and thinking that if you spend enough money on him, that'll be enough to essentially buy his loyalty.

[DanielleMarie98]

That’s what my friends tell me but I can’t find anyone better. If I break up with him I’ll be alone, and that’s what I’m afraid of.

[kaylaS91]

what are you even holding onto him for, though? Like.. do you feel as though he actually cares about you or is just hanging around for the free ride?

[Hawn84]

Danielle, you WILL be able to find someone better. There are a lot of guys out there that will appreciate you for what you do.

[muzamil197]

Well yes he takes you foe granted beco u r always there for him, dont ever make yourself available al the time u will lose ur importance. Give him space n maintain ur space, let him make an effort to get ur attention. U will see things changing for better

[SnapTsch]

sounds like you are an amazing, loving, caring, down to earth, giving, affectionate and reasonable girlfriend to an ungrateful, disrespectful, entitled, sleazeball, shallow minded, douche boyfriend

I hope that sums it up

[martyfellow]

Yes, the relationships one sided. He only cares about himself, and isn't ready to commit to anyone else on a footing of equality.

You need to let him grow up on his own!

[rogue01]

everything. you are being treated as a door mat. plain and simple. breaking up would be the healthiest thing to do why and if you would like to me to elaborate, I will.

[mi2precious]

lol men will be men.. but this seems a bit too far. what u r doing wrong here is pampering him too much with gifts and ur behaviour. just make him see it clearly that u dont like this and he will not like it either if u did so. ibviiudky not that u want to do so. but still it hurst u the same way it will hurt him if u started doing such things

[akadatank44]

Dump this duchebag. He doesn't care for you at all. There is no trust in this relationship because he's always hiding something it appears. He doesn't love you, seems to only be with your just because you spoil the heck out of him and shows no appreciation. Time to cut all ties with him and find someone better.

[ATuairiscean]

How do I phrase this, I think your heart is in the right place but dial it back notch. You can give someone too much attention.

[ilovepanties]

doing nothing but obviously treating a douche bag waay to good... thats just plain disrespectful and a real man would never treat his girl like that

[Liisjak]

Seems like those shoes are worth more than he is. Ditch him, take the shoes back.

[LaughingStick]

First, why would you spend that much on shoes? ESPECIALLY for that kimd of person.

I got halfway through this. Fucking tell him to walk, or resign to being used, abused amd forgotten.

[DanielleMarie98]

He’s a sneaker head so he likes Jordans and stuff. He really wanted them

[LaughingStick]

*sigh* While that's exceptionally kind of you, and any decent person would be appreciative, you still shouldn't spend that much money on this douche - especially in one sitting. Sneakerhead? Sounds like he can use his face to walk out the door then.

Drop him on his ass.

[DanielleMarie98]

Lmao, trust me. I can’t find anyone, all the guys here are jerks.

[LaughingStick]

So you lowered your standards.
Maybe don't spend $400 on shoes, and save for a car. Then a job that pays well enough. Save save save for about a year... and move the hell out of there.

Don't give excuses like that unless there is a gun to your head. And if You ignored quite a few guys, like I suspect you have, MAYBE look at those guys that are not as attractive. Look elsewhere for your affection, attention, and sexual needs. Seriously, I hate seeing attitudes like his be rewarded and women choosing to suffer.

Hell, maybe taking this advice will change your life

[DanielleMarie98]

I have a car, I’m an assistant manager, and I’ve been treated wrong in my last relationship. I’m afraid it’ll happen again and whenever I try to find a guy they only care about my looks and they think I’m a weirdo. Also, I’m asexual so no guy would dare date me. Which is understandable, I wish I could enjoy being single but whenever I am I’m a mess.

[DanielleMarie98]

I didn’t date my current boyfriend for looks, he found me cute in high school and some of my friends hooked him up with me.

[LaughingStick]

After reading all the opinions... I sincerely hope you change your mind on this guy. There is nothing to be gained by being with him at this point. and considering in america there are 326 MILLION people, and about 1/3 are men... there's a huge dating pool.

[LaughingStick]

Honestly a lot of people here find you astoundingly beautiful. You look great, are kind and really make sone of us guys wish you were our girlfriend..

personally, I'd settle for hanging out, gaming, goofing off and spending tine together.

But that's me... bonus if you like pizza lol

[DanielleMarie98]

Thanks :) I like video games as well. I don’t play very often but I would like getting into it more. If you have an Xbox we can play together!

[LaughingStick]

I don't anymore BUT Orchidion is my gamertag, try adding me!

[shadow1332]

you're not seeming to be doing anything wrong. Though it does sound rather suspicious as to what he is doing.

[Arya_Christ]

yeah you are doing one wrong and that is not breaking up with him. you are young and beautiful. you will get and you deserve a better man than him.

[DanielleMarie98]

I can’t find a better man, all the guys where I live aren’t anything special.

[Arya_Christ]

doesn't matter. he is a jerk. to look at other women while in a relationship is one thing but to say that he will look what he like is totally different level of being jerk. where do you live and how are other boys there?

[DanielleMarie98]

I live in Meuthens, MA. The guys here are a bunch of drunks or rich jerks. I’m not about it

[Arya_Christ]

that's a bit sad situation. hope you will find someone better than him and answer to last line question is no. you are not doing anything wrong. he is a jerk. good luck.

[Dave1971]

Steal the shoes back and walk out of his life. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Your boyfriend is a douche. He doesn't appreciate your gift, stares at other girls, lets you pay for dinner and is moody. Seriously, what do you see in him?

[DanielleMarie98]

I offered to pay because it was his birthday

[Opinion Owner]

I get that but he shouldn't take you up on that offer. Did he actually make you pay?

[DanielleMarie98]

We were going back and forth about it but I didn’t mind paying. Really.. aha

[Opinion Owner]

is this the first time he let you?

[DanielleMarie98]

Yeah, he’s not that bad. I feel like he was just a bit annoyed that day

[Opinion Owner]

how long have you been together?

[DanielleMarie98]

Two years

[Opinion Owner]

well if he's been paying for everything for 2 years, I guess you can let it slide ;)

[RD196]

You are an amazing girlfriend.. caring loving.. he should appreciate ur efforts.. if not then im sorry u deserve better.

[BMWE92M3]

Oh. I'm reslly sorry to hear that. sounds like you are a very sweet person. definitely a keeper I don't know what he's doing

[madhatters4]

sounds you like you are too lenient for sure

[Gabewilson]

Move on you deserve a gentleman.

[johnmichaei]

catering to someone that doesn't care about you

[justadude123]

yes, you need a better boyfriend

[CoolSky01]

is he hot?

[Nahid1234]

Wow 😂