Why does my boyfriend want more sexual experience?

[Anonymous]

We've been together for 2 and a half years, he was a virgin but I wasn't, it has never really bothered him, and the sex has always been great. We broke up briefly a few months ago, and although we got back together, I had a hard time letting go of the situation and we had little/no sex for the last 6 months, and he's been very patient. A couple of weeks ago I initiated sex and, as expected, it was great. After that he tells me he wants more experience, saying that even one of his (ugly/annoying) friends has slept with 2 people, whereas he's only slept with me. I said he could go and sleep with someone if he wanted, and he said that he couldn't because he knew I would break up with him (which I would). He then suggested a threesome, to which I was mortified but didn't show it, and then said with another guy or another girl? He said it could be with another guy, but he'd expect to experience it with another girl as well. I could never stand to be in a threesome with someone I loved because a. it would feel like cheating, and b. I would be jealous that he doesn't want me as much as the other girl. He said that the only thing he wouldn't want is for the other guy to come inside me as he sees that as being sort've special/reserved for having children. We've been having sex again plenty of times in the last couple of weeks, and now he says he's kinda going off the idea of a threesome, but was thinking that maybe we could experiment with toys. I don't have a problem with experimenting with toys but I just thought that when we were married and older, and the sex had diminished that that's when we'd start experimenting, rather than him being bored already. I know that we didn't have sex for 6 months, so I can sort've understand it, as he's claiming that the threesomes/toys might up my sex drive (which was actually only reduced because I was hurt by him by there we go), and that he wants to please me, but I KNOW that he finds the sex fantastic, as do I, and I've seen many couples break up because they've only ever slept with each other, and I really think it's sad, and I just can't understand it. He would never cheat on me, and I know that, but why does he feel the need to have more experience when he knows he's the best I've ever had, I can't help it but I feel slightly betrayed, I know we didn't have sex for a long time, but I feel as if we're back on track now. Any ideas please?

[Anonymous]

Hi,

I am in a similar situation to your boyfriend. I was a virgin and lost it to my girlfriend who has been with two other guys.

I have shown jealousy to her past and she knows it but there are so many times which she doesn't know off that I get so sh*ted about her past. I still do actually

I love having sex with her and I know she loves me and I that I am her present, though there is like a feeling of injustice that she has been with other guys and I don't feel special at all.

So in an attempt to be 'special' I wanted to do things with her that she hasn't done before e.g. sex in a pool.

I think this is a case where your boyfriend doesn't feel special and wants to do something as a 'first time' with you' however doing this won't make him feel any better.

My advice is let him know how special he is and that the other guys don't mean anything to you. This can only assist in him over coming his feelings the rest is up to him. If he does get over it he might still get the feelings coming up now and again but just let him know that he is special : )

This is my personal opinion to your situation.

good luck : )

[Asker]

Thankyou for replying so quickly! I'll sit down and talk with him this weekend, I really hope that it is just him being jealous (otherwise I may have to post again!!) Thanks for your help :)

[sanji]

you need to sit down and talk to him and let him know how you feel and you are to ask him what more he want and you are to try to do it