What does it mean when your boyfriend doesn't talk to you for days?

[Anonymous]

Me and my boyfriend have been pretty serious. We got into a fight last week, and haven`t seen each other since. He tried apologizing and tried getting back with me, but I told him I wanted to make sure he was serious about his apology and that he would really work on our relationship with me. He said he promised, and bugged me for awhile, then stopped. I got upset because I thought he was serious, but now it seems like he`s given up. I told him I want to be with him but that I`m scared he will hurt me again. He then replied saying he is scared I will hurt him too. The tables turned and I started calling him, but every time I did I was upset. He finally said it was hard to talk to me. I asked if it meant we were really over, then he said no. Then said he would call me later because he`s at work. He never called. Instead he texted saying "what if I hurt you again, what if I can't trust you again.. then what". I replied and said I feel like he`s playing with my emotions - One day telling me he loves me and promises to change, and then the next day showing me he`s giving up - and it hurts. He said he hates that he hurts me, but never said anything else after. I texted after a couple of hours saying I wanted us to talk, he never replied so I called and he kept hanging up on me. I got furious and started calling until he picked up. When he did, he said he was watching a show and sounded upset that I was bothering him. I said "this is what I`m talking about... you still put everything before me, I thought you said you would change.. " then we got into our usual argument. I started crying, and then he said he would call me when the show was over. It`s his 2nd time telling me he would call, but he never did. It`s been 4 days since, and I still haven`t heard from him. I have no idea what to do. I am afraid if I call he will be cold, and I know it will break my heart. I have been so down and depressed and I know by calling him it will make it worse. I feel like I am chasing him, and I don`t want to. I have no idea what I should do. My friends are telling me to wait, but I`m worried. What is he thinking? Is he single? Are we still together?

What does it mean when a guy doesn't contact you for days?

[xsandos]

I think we are living parrallel lives. This is happening to me except I am living with my boyfriend. It is harder and easier this way because for one, you know where they lay their head each night, so it's easier... but harder because you can't really step back and see it from another perspective. But by the looks of it it seems like you are going to have to do some serious reevaluating of the relationship. I agree that he does need some time to pull back from you, but honestly if you guys are taking long stretches of not talking to each other, it's going to be harder and harder to come back together as close as you were before. Be the bigger person and have a heart to heart with him in person, and see how that goes. A girl told me the other day that she's calling it like she sees it "It's Over". Those were harsh words, and I sort of believed her in a way, but I really did not. I am really uncertain what I need to do myself because I feel like things have got to change a lot before I can really see myself down the line with this guy because things are really not working out for me. He hardly talks to me, shows affection or lets me know he loves me. He refuses to hang out with my friends or see a therapist... or really talk about how he feels. Things HAVE to change soon for this to go on much longer, and you too should really think about what you need to change for you to continue also.

[Anonymous]

He needs time to think things through, he's busy or he doesn't deal with problems but avoids them

[Asker]

I think he is avoiding them...

[Anonymous]

Maybe he's just busy. I don't know.

[Asker]

The last time he did this, he wasn`t sure if he still wanted to be wtih me or not.