How do I get my boyfriend back?

[Harmseygrace]

My boyfriend has always had this thing where he doesn't think he deserves me and he's scared of hurting me. He has depression so it doesn't help the matter. He's always been great to me and he ticks off everything I've ever wanted. He was my best friend before we got together and he still is.

A little over a week ago he broke up with me because he's scared of hurting me and he doesn't think he deserves me. That's how bad his depression is... He now has three girlfriends. I'm heartbroken and I haven't stopped crying for days and days. I know there's still hope though. He still loves and misses me and he had a big fight with them last night. He misses me but he also wants them. I feel like Satan is getting in the way because he knows I'm good for him.

He said he had this feeling that he had to talk to me or he would miss out something good. I have a very strong feeling that we're meant for each other and we'll be together. It hasn't weakened the whole time, even now. It's special and I doubt a lot of people would understand it.

How can I get him back? His depression is a hard thing to get past with this and he's also getting a bit too comfortable with his girlfriends. Should I wait and just let it work it's itself out? I'm not sure.

By the way, the heaps of girlfriends makes him seem like a bad person but please don't think badly of him. He's my best friend and I wouldn't have fallen for him if he wasn't so amazing.

Updates

+1 y

Just ignore this unless you're it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JiDzwbQgTI

[TonyMetal_1986]

If he was so amazing then he wouldn't have left you.

Miss grace your just wasting your time, you can't live your life on getting back togethee than brake up and keep repeating the same scenario, there are a lot of good people outhere whom you will have a stable life with and will make you forget about him.
Your being sincere to him while he's cheating and having fun with other girls and use you like a spare tire.
If he cannot treat his depression and learn how to have a stable life with a straight mind, you will be hurt a lot.
I know it's hard, but you have to start learning about forgetting him and cut all the bonds that relates you to him and find a life that suits you.
Your a precious wonderful girl, don't waste yourself like this.
He had a lot of chances and he broke them all.
In the end it's your choice, but i don't want you to be hurt, cause your a sweet girl, don't let your love to him become an obsession.

[Harmseygrace]

He's my soulmate though. I know he is.

[TonyMetal_1986]

Miss grace, later in life when realize that your giving yourself to someone who doesn't share with you the same feelings and doesn't let you feel it then you will be hurt a lot because that's love from one side which means your giving yourself to someone who is an illusion and playing tricks on you and using you.

It's your right to feel loved and happy just the way your treating him.

Your a pure girl, giving yourself only to him, he should make you feel the same.

[Harmseygrace]

He loves me. Satans just leading him the wrong way...

[TonyMetal_1986]

Miss grace try to sit alone a little bit and concantrate on the subject and you will find out the truth.

If satan is leading him the wrong way and he doesn't want to change then this is a big problem, i just don't want you to be hurt.

Believe me that there are a lot of guys who are good and won't let you suffers like this and will make you feel loved the way you deserve, if you continue like this and he doesn't changes, you will remain hurt and become depressed while his living his life to the fullest.

[OlderAndWiser]

Sometimes, guys that ahe break up with that kind of excuse - "I'm doing this because it's the best thing for you" - when they really want to break up and perhaps even play the field for awhile. Just a possibility to consider.

[Harmseygrace]

Yeah I've considered that. It's honestly nothing like him though. Him breaking up with me cause of that matches up better. He's always said since day dot that he reckons he doesn't deserve me, he has depression which makes all that stuff worse, etc. It just makes more sense and matches up with his character a lot better.

[OlderAndWiser]

Okay. But within a week, three different girls are following him like puppy dogs?

[Harmseygrace]

It sounds pretty bad but it's a bit more complicated than that. He still is a wonderful person and the best boyfriend I could've asked for, that's just one of his very few faults as naive as that sounds.

[OlderAndWiser]

If he needs to spend some time with other girls to realize that you are The One for him, then you simply need to let him have that experience. If you are The One, he'll come back to you.

[Harmseygrace]

Okay. That's probably it, I'll just have to be patient which I'm bad at. Thank you. 😊

[OlderAndWiser]

You're welcome. Good luck!

[OlderAndWiser]

Thanks for MHO!

[Harmseygrace]

You're welcome.

[NickiB]

This is difficult. I'm sorry you're suffering like this.

If his depression is the biggest obstacle than yeah he needs to work on that.

He's never going to be able to give you all of him because it's holding him back.

You want to help him. That's where you start. Help him see he's a good man talk to him about therapy as well

There is no easy answer to this question. But waiting is the only option for you.

Also explore other options find out if there isn't more out there for you.

[NickiB]

Thanks for mho

[Harmseygrace]

You're welcome

[NickiB]

U feeling better about the situation?

[Harmseygrace]

Yeah I am. I don't reckon I'll go back to him. Thanks for asking.

[NickiB]

Oh no. Something happen?

[Harmseygrace]

He'd rather be with them than me. He said that himself.

[NickiB]

Oh no.

Are you sure you're okay? Do you need to talk?

[Harmseygrace]

I'm alright at the moment. I might if I start getting upset though. Thank you.

[WhiteShoulder]

He must be REALLY fuckin hot...

Tell him you love him and being apart from him is hurting you way worse than anything he could possibly do.

Also, when you do get back together, go a little further physically than you did before. Not all the way, just a little. Pm me if you want to discuss this in detail.

He sounds a lot like Lord Byron, so yeah, he probably is hot. Good luck 😊.

[Harmseygrace]

Haha he is. I have... Isn't working. OlderAndWiser said that I might just have to wait for him to figure out that I'm what's best for him. I'm just gonna have to wait I guess.

[WhiteShoulder]

Thank you 😊

[Harmseygrace]

You're welcome. 😊

[WildNekoWolf]

@Harmseygrace : I am not hot.

[Harmseygrace]

@WildNekoWolf Of course you are!

[AustinMan]

I feel your pain. He's clearly a confused and conflicted young man. Is the getting treated for his depression? Is he on medication? Does he take it?

Is his fear of hurting you physical, e. g. he likes to play rough and feels guilty about it, emotional, or what?

[Harmseygrace]

I don't think he is getting treated. His family doesn't even know apparently. I think it's mostly emotional but it might be a bit physical too.

[Ninjazzed]

That’s what they all say. Same excuses. Chances are, he’s an immature, selfish asshole who would rather lie than admit he wanting something temporary and nothing long-term with you. My ex is exactly how you described this guy and it’s a sympathy tactic they use. Don’t be stupid, he’s exploring other options and kept you around when it was convenient for him. He isn’t worth your time. Move on.

[pyrro_]

Since autistic are retarded... I'll say for the majority because they are muted from ". ."

Hi. I'm not actually retarded... :I learned stuff differently:

Hi. That is making me more intelligent... :Yes, I did not ignore you:

HI

By
The
Way
I
Am
Not
Autistic

[Harmseygrace]

What?

[blutwolfe]

I'm sorry it ended that way, he just wants more experience with other women it sounds like. It's probably the double whammy because it can push you away too, and at your age most people don't want to get locked down. All good things come to an end sadly, and even to the best of us.

They say the holiday months are the biggest times for breakups, I've been seeing it a lot lately, we can all cry together lol.

[Harmseygrace]

We had our whole future planned out and he was 100% serious about it.

[blutwolfe]

That was like me with my ex, she picked out the place we were gonna live, get married, have kids, etc. Turns out she didn't want kids, said no to marriage, ended up not wanting to live there and she left to her grandparents. So now I'm stuck here in a pickle on top of heartache. It's a rough world, some people can be heartless even when we thought they had the biggest heart. I was just so blindsided by it is what hurt the most.

[Harmseygrace]

Aw I'm sorry about that. If you need to talk, I'm here.

He's definitely not like that though.

[blutwolfe]

how would you know? He literally broke up with you, like I don't wanna sound like an asshole, but the fact he's doing everything to not be with you is kindof a sign. You may not know him as well as you think you do.

My ex did that same thing, started seeing a bunch of guys, said she was depressed, saying I should find someone better, I don't deserve her, etc. It's more common than you realize.

[Harmseygrace]

I would've noticed if he was like that while we were just friends. If I did, I wouldn't have fallen for him and we wouldn't have been such great friends.

[blutwolfe]

A lot of relationships start out as just friends, I wouldn't say it's a unique scenario. You really do have a pure heart though I'm sorry this happened to you, it's a cold world.

[Harmseygrace]

It's okay. Thank you. 😊

[Aiko_E_Lara]

I won't be certain but sometimes, people can use that excuse to get out of a relationship while their partners won't feel so bad because they think they still have hope. If that's his decision and it hurts you a lot, there's nothing you can do but tell him how that made you feel and be strong.

[Harmseygrace]

He's not using excuses. He's not like that. He genuinely loves me and he would tell me if those were his reasons. He's very honest.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

If him being ill is the reason why you've been tolerating him, just remember it's not your fault why he's like that. You have to prioritize yourself other than burdening yourself for someone.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

It's up to you to determine if it's really worth your time.

[Harmseygrace]

I haven't been tolerating him.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

Just remember you're not nothing without anyone.

[Harmseygrace]

I know. Thank you. 😊

[Aiko_E_Lara]

*Hugs you*

[Absolutelybonkers]

Tell your boyfriend how much you love him, tell him that he's the perfect match for you. Tell him that if he leaves you thatll break your heart. I hope this helps

[Harmseygrace]

Thank you

[IlyaTheImpaler]

"he broke up with me because he's scared of hurting me and he doesn't think he deserves me. That's how bad his depression is... He now has three girlfriends"

lmfao 😂😂😂 is this the same guy in your last question?

[Harmseygrace]

No completely different guy

[ColoradoKid]

If he is depressed he needs to be on some antidepressants and do some counseling. I don't know if he is doing all of that now or not. You need to talk to a professional too. Depression doesn't only affect him but every one around him too.

[Shamalien]

Lol he left u for 3 girls idgaf what u say ur nuts. U can’t help a guy who treats u like this and walk away with any self respect

[Sevenpointfive]

get a backbone and move on from this loser

[Harmseygrace]

He's not a loser. Please don't say that.

[Sevenpointfive]

he is a loser. a guy with 4 girlfriends and still depressed? he preys on the weak girls because they will satisfy his cruel intentions

[Coloradomtnman2]

Don’t date someone who’s openly ill. Let him get better first then maybe discuss a relationship. Depression is a serious issue

[Harmseygrace]

Nope. I'm there to help him.

[Coloradomtnman2]

Right so then be a friend but don’t date him

[Harmseygrace]

No. I want to be with him.

[thot_patrol_car]

I agree with this. If they are clinically depressed, they can become dependent on you to make them happy. When you are not able to be there for them when they need it, it makes it so much worse for them. It just isn't healthy, so waiting until they are getting treatment is the best thing to do. I did a lot of things I regret in the past just to cope with how I was feeling, and I really wish someone had stopped me.

[Harmseygrace]

@thot_patrol_car I'm not leaving him.

[Lumberman989]

He needsto work on his depression first before or else you're always going to have this problem

[Arshu007]

You should let him relaize his mistake so wait patiently if you are this confidence about his feelings for you he will be back trust me 😊

[Hannajenky]

You need to move on he is a toxic person

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should let him go then. He simply just doesn't deserve you.

[Harmseygrace]

I know that's you.

[Opinion Owner]

Who?

[Harmseygrace]

You know who I'm talking about.

[Opinion Owner]

No I don't.

[Harmseygrace]

Okie dokie sweetie pie

[Opinion Owner]

I'm not your "boyfriend"

[Harmseygrace]

I'm pretty sure you are.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm not.

[Harmseygrace]

Well why is it that when you log back on, you've suddenly replied? I know the way you write. I think I know you pretty well sweetheart.

[ChefPapiChulo]

I think it’s time to move on

[Exorcist_Rampage]

Just show him that you and him belong together.

[lumpyboy2001]

being cool works