When are men mature enough to be in real relationships?

Question

Why is that so many men in there 20s just want to hookup? Where are the men that really want girlfriends?

RipperMetal · Accepted Answer

It depends on your crowd... I despise people who are just peaking around the bush. I'm only in high school but like I'd rather have a stable relationship instead of just messing around. Like guys aren't all the same... Depends on your area, age group, group you're with, and many other things... If it's like a group that just likes to have fun a lot but yet are still fn to be around, you are most likely going to get a guy that is just like a hookup and then whatever afterwards... You kinda can't get a guy that's part of those groups, you gotta try and find the spontanious guy that likes to have fun at the right times with an adventorous side to him. Or the quiet but yet crazy guy that nobdy really understands and is kinda the lone wolf but it really turns out that he has a lot of friends and is find and won't take sh*t from anybody and has a great sense of humor... The thing though is that it seems women now days can't find these guys. And there's a reason for that. The reason is because they judge guys by their cover. These guys that I explain you really can't find because women daydream about mr. perfect but when he's right in front of them they get turned away because the maturity level is great . Sounds dumb but try and understand; Like if you walk into a resturant and see the waiter it's all going to be buisness oriented. Between you and him there will be a transaction with a nice how are you attitude but no personal relationship behind the scene. In that si Unless you talk to these people and get outside the circle people will never understand who they are looking for y'know. Like the people you talk to you constantly are most likey not going to be that person unless that person is searching for a relationship. Because the Mr. Perfect guys are more content with where they are at and the people they know, they don't need more... Most of the reason the other AVERAGE guy, chosen by reputation, is because they are not content and are continuously exploring other worlds looking for that contentness or expirimenting with life to see what they find or just straight up being dumb and ruining what a MAN really is, which is why they are never serious and MATURE for a relationship... You kind of have to search in this day and age because that Mr. Perfect is being a man and living life maturally and taking care of priorities (which some girls look at as a turn because it's "OMG HE NEVER WANTS TO HAVE FUN") Understand that it's not that he doesn't want to have fun he just has to get priorities finished first. His mind set will be that of taking care of his family first instead of going to a bear game with frieds and not checking in to see what's going on in their lives for months on end. So as the guys below and I all say " It doesn't matter the age but just who YOU are around and the people that surround you..." take these words of advice rom all of us seriously and try to find your man that will treat you good and right... I wish you luck on your search

markml · Accepted Answer

The sad truth is that if boys weren't biologically programmed to want sex so badly, most of them would never bother having anything to do with girls. Not all, but most.

One reason is because they don't understand girls and can't relate to them at all. Young girls grow up thinking about one day meeting prince charming, where as young boys grow up thinking that girls have cooties. Both are immature in different ways.

Now, throw sex in the picture and it just complicates everything. Suddenly, boys start paying a lot of attention to girls, and girls think they're special because they're getting all this attention. They date. They hook-up. Maybe they even have a relationship. But deep down, the perceptions haven't really changed.

And to make matters worse, when that odd boy comes along who is a sappy romantic and is looking for more than just sex, girls end up treating him very poorly. I'm speaking from personal experience here...

And the other boys look at him, and think, "Gee, I'm glad I'm not that sucker."

Eventually, both boy and girl grow older and they each learn to compromise a little bit more. But the reason it takes so long is because most of us are under the false impression that we're already mature once we hit puberty. We don't feel we need to grow up. So we don't until we're forced to.

I can't speak for when girls mature, but the average guy is going to mature when he realizes his life isn't going to go anywhere otherwise. After all, no one wants to be alone forever, so if the guy realizes that, he realizes that he needs to start investing in actual relationships. For some guys, it may take them a very long time to realize this.

And for the guy who was a dreamer to begin with? Well...we don't really change, except we get a little bit more cynical with age. Others would say that it's becoming more realistic. That's a matter of opinion.

coffeeeadddict · Accepted Answer

I don't think there is an age. I have met men who are in their 30's and still can't grasp the idea of settling down, but I've also met 18 year old men who are engaged. It really depends on the guy.

The men that want girlfriends will look for the girls they see as girlfriends or potential wives. I don't know you, so I wouldn't know what you dress like or how you act, but if you dress or act cheap, you will be treated cheaply.

As females, we tend to underestimate how much the way we dress can affect males. Sure, you may be turning heads, but the guy isn't thinking "Man, I really want to be in a steady relationship with that woman." He is probably thinking, "I'd hit that." Ask a male you can trust about what kind of signals your look is giving.

If you have on excessive make up, you will look cheap. You will look like the kind of girl that would hook up with a guy. So, when the guy wants sex, he'll call you. When he wants a relationship, he won't. Again, it's probably good to ask that trusted male friend for input.

If you talk trashy and make a lot of sexual innuendos, you sound cheap. You will sound like a girl who just wants sex, so he will treat you as such. If he wants a girlfriend, he won't.

Don't be a hook up girl either. If a guy asks to hook up, say no! Why does he get to have sex with you if he doesn't even want to date you? You want a relationship, not just meaningless sex. Don't have meaningless sex if it isn't what you want.

So if you want to just have sex with males, not relationships, play the part. If you want to be a girlfriend and even a wife, play that part. Advertise what you're selling.

I don't know if you do any of these things, but you should double check anyway. You can also ask trusted male friends what they think. Good luck! You'll find the right guy, he'll love you for you and want you to be his beautiful girlfriend! :)

Standingpretty · Accepted Answer

I have a man who is ready to be married and he is 22. The age where men are ready to marry is different for each man. Some people never mature, some mature young.The men who really want girlfriends already have them or don't know how to get one. Or, just haven't find a nice girl yet. People who are bitter about finding relationships never find them, you have to enjoy life and be open minded before love will find you. A lot of people are not ready for love and would like to see what else there is first, that doesn't make them bad people. A lot of people don't realize they're not ready for love and question why they can't find it or what's wrong with them when they should be working on being a strong, independent person on their own and enjoying life instead. When are men mature enough to be in a real relationship? When they make the effort to understand  and compromise and create a relationship based on effort and commitment. When are you ready for a real relationship? When you are ready to do the same intern. Relationships are a two-way street.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

When they can't get laid without one.

MtnDewMan · Answer

age and gendar honestly have nothing to do with maturity. most people male and female are immature in my highschool. like you, I'm very sick and tired of having flings that never last. I have a future planned out and I want someone that has a future planned too. I'm one of the most mature guys in my school and that my parents and their friends know, I can have fun but I'm serious about important things and relationships especially.

having flings doesn't do a thing for me but make me feel like sh*t because the feelings never last and the love dies quickly. I want something that lasts and really its been the girls that don't know or ever want a long term relationship, I'm tired of the games and BS I want someone who I can settle down with, plus with me joining the ARMY I would get more money marrying anyways. you will find that there are guys that want a future but your looking in all the wrong places.

first off I think a guy that wants a future will voice it early on, talking about college or future plans EX I'm leaving for the army in june 27th, to me sex in a relationship has been bad very very bad because it adds a whole level of complication and emotions that I don't need and can't handle among my stresses of school work and army related things. sex invokes false feelings and makes girls act very strange and its not a good thing. sex should wait IMO because then you both know you have genuine feelings for one another and its not just him getting in and getting out, wham bam kind of thing. a good guy is really hard to fine, an honest person is even harder.

relationships in a sense can be like buying a car, you look, compare, keep looking, sleep on a decision, test drive the car, and once you finally decide he's the one then you can let him in, heck even get married. relationships are very tough no matter what stage in life and they require constant work and attention from both parties, it takes two to make it work and its not going to be easy.

scar1 · Answer

first of all what you desire and don't desire has nothing to do with maturity. although, it is true that men and women and men generally develop differently and are just different culturally. from what I've seen the general age seems to be 24-30. usually guys want to have fun for awhile and then have a serious relationship when they want to settle down. by the way I have had act like a muture adult since I was 15, since I had to look after myself. I never desired a serious relationship then and nor do I currently desire one

Minxxe · Answer

men as they enter their 40's are absolutely lovely, they mature nicely around this time and their skin just seems to fit them right. Like they've been cooked properly or soemthing.

they eventually lose that boyishness that makes them aggressive and which turns them into "players". Yessiree, there's something to be said about a man in his 40's, he starts to speak sense and grow an element of sensitivity & charm that makes you fall madly in love...

itsweird182 · Answer

I'm 22 and really want a girlfriend. Couldn't care less about finding a random hookup. I've been trying to get a girlfriend for a good 2 years now and no luck.

shani982 · Answer

It has nothing to do with the age. I have seen guys, who are 20 21 and very mature, and I have also seen guys, who are in their thirties, and still immature

cgiovanna17 · Answer

i agree maturing as a lot to do with the individual, although women mature must faster than a man, if I was you I would start looking to date someone a couple years older than yourself.. chances are he is much more mature than the guys your age

ElleB123 · Answer

Those men are hard to find.  Even the ones that say they want to be in a serious relationship, and you believe them because they're nearly 30 and assume they're mature, turn out to be the have-your-cake-and-eat-it-too type.

katie_mcn · Answer

men + mature = never sorry buh even my dad of 43 moved to enland cos he got bord of where we lived they are all pricks ?

playa_pan · Answer

A lot of guys want to hook up in their 20s is because it's the "prime time."

AmazingParkour · Answer

Yes, there are. You're just looking in the wrong places.

colombo21 · Answer

im 20 and I'm gonna propose soon so I don't know if that answers your questions. but for most guys its just "not cool" to be in a relationship.

iSkydive · Answer

Well, I'm here. I want a GF... to hell with hooking up. It's so shallow.

Dom163 · Answer

Maturity has nothing to do with gender its about where and how you grew up people are individuals not a single entity

jacquesvol · Answer

My wife and me started our relationship when wer were both 21. It's still going very strong.

hornybob · Answer

When the bimbo is ready, the mature man will appear. Confusious 500bc

Anonymous · Answer

n their 20s. but Id never take some assholes sloppy seconds. Id demand a virgin

Anonymous · Answer

It differs for every guy.

Anonymous · Answer

People can be mature at younger ages.

Anonymous · Answer

you're just meeting the wrong guys unfortunately

Wasiq · Answer

Nice answers

When are men mature enough to be in real relationships?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

When are men mature enough to be in real relationships?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.