Who falls in love harder, men or women?

[sikoo31]

who falls in love harder, the man, or the woman?

idk, I've heard its the girl. but in my only serious relationship, I fell harder for her than she did for me, even tho she fell first.

Men

Women

Depends

Updates

+1 y

ok so most people think it depends, but generally, it seems women get attached fast, men take a while, but then fall harder.

thanks to everyone that answered and voted.

[ZenSpace]

I think we are on a biological timer. For the first month or so, it is the girl who is most attached. That is why so many girls get all broken up about their high school sweethearts. They got attached quickly, before he really had time to get attached.

Then the guy gets attached and he loves more after about a year or 2. Then the woman gets a little bored after about 5 or 6 years, and many of them leave at that point, leaving the guy devastated. Statistically this is the way most divorces work in America.

People say the "love forever" but your average woman falls out of love after about 5 to 7 years with the same man.

The men on the other hand, they want to have sex with other women, especially after they have been with one woman for a long time, they crave variety. But these same men, who want to have sexual variety, usually still love the woman they are married to, and want to stay married. The women do not. They stop loving the men.

That is what divorce statistics tell us anyways.

So who falls in love harder? it depends on how long they were together. But men are more likely to feel that a woman ruined his life, while women are more likely to be heart broken after a short relationship, but feel fine after ending a long one.

[sikoo31]

yeah maritally speaking, I think you're right.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Wasn't this answered before? :P I'd say it's easily the men. Men are always the ones falling far harder into love if they are really in love. However, I'd say that's only a bit later and more into the adult life. When we're teenagers/kids I'd say it's girls then. It's really kinda cruel how our society is where it seems to have come to that.

Basically I've had this theory for a while that women when they are girls fall in love really hard for their first boyfriend. But because boys tend to not be interested in a real relationship young they just use them for sex or whatever and then move on and the girl gets hurt and steels her heart and never really falls as deeply into love again. Sure they will love a guy, but they'll never put such a focus and emphasis on their lover as a guy will in the adult life when guys are finally looking for a real relationship with meaning. And then the guy falls harder, the girl doesn't. This is also why study after study shows when a guy dies first, the girl moves on (it's more also due to the fact she generally has friends she was able to keep and family to help her live on) where as the guy, if the girl dies first in a marriage, the guy pretty much dies mentally with her. A real shame :\ kinda a cruel twist of fate.

[sikoo31]

dam, this makes sense too... now I'm really interested.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

@ update: clearly my theory is the correct theory -_q

[sikoo31]

haha

[Anonymous]

it really depends on the situation and the individuals involved.

in every relationship there is always going to be someone who cares more, it is NEVER 50/50. someone always cares a bit more. and that person is the one that falls harder in love and also the one that hurts the most when things don't work out

I've had one relationship where I cared more. I was so blinded that I let things go and ignored all the warning signs. I knew things weren't going well, I knew that, but I was so into him that I made excuses for him without facing the reality of the situation. And that hurt. It hurts that he had so much power over me and my emotions. So I never put myself in that position again. With other boyfriends, I never allow myself to fall hard for them. I always go out with guys that I know will never hurt me because they care more.

lol so in conclusion, it really does depend on each individual case

[sikoo31]

makes sense, thanks for answering in such detail.

[Opinion Owner]

haha anytime :)

[toulouse]

Effigirl.

@ "I think:

Women = Fall in love quicker (Most)

Men = Fall in love harder (Most)

Because, it is hard for a man to fall..and when they do..they fall hard. For women, we fall quick...most of us..and over time we keep falling deeper.."

>>>>>>Studies show men report falling in love at first site ten to one compared to women. but I guess you are asking opinions, not research results.

doesn't matter anyways because all the studies and all your objective observations are based on self report. and people lie.

there is NO way to prove who falls in love harder faster deeper darker straighter rounder sideways up and down around.. these answers are all just mental masturbation and ego stroking.

[sikoo31]

lol ok

[tigergirl4]

In my current relationship I fell HARD for my boyfriend, he didn't even see me that way because he was already involved with someone else. A few years later he asks me out and is acting like I had acted a few years ago. I'm not even going to lie, I don't get butterflies like I used to, but that's just because I have already been through that phase of love, and now it is a slow simmering love for me, where as he's in that lovey-dovey phase where everything is new(well newish, it's been 8 1/2 months lol)

[sikoo31]

ok...

[taster]

I 've seen 'em lovesmitten in both sexes...I don't know that I could pick a sex...I remember when I fell for a F*** Queen...oh she was good looking...I lost 17 pounds...my friends all thought I was crazy...but I think that just about every one of them (the males anyway) went on to lose their head over some gal and make a fool out of themselves..the females I know seemed to have gotten that out of the way in their younger days for some reason...but us Dinosaurs know: There is no fool like an Old Fool...

[sikoo31]

nice answer man!

[deathnote]

Women fall in love faster. Men, when they fall in love, they REALLY fall in love. Most girls nowadays are just delusional and confused. They don't know what they want and use their insecurities to accept any man who is willing to take them.

[sikoo31]

interesting.

[HidingMyHeart]

I agree with this one!

[haven]

I'll second that lol a lot of my friends are in relationships because he is willing to take them and that helps them to feel better about their insecurities . But not all girls are like that I am not in a relationship and will only be in one if it is with someone who I have feelings for not just because I want to be in a relationship. :)

[sikoo31]

girls aren't the only ones that do this tho haha

[deathnote]

I said 'most girls' ;)

[sikoo31]

o yeah ha ha ok

[Eiffelgirl21]

I think:

Women = Fall in love quicker (Most)

Men = Fall in love harder (Most)

Because, it is hard for a man to fall..and when they do..they fall hard. For women, we fall quick...most of us..and over time we keep falling deeper..

[sikoo31]

interesting way of answering haha

[Eiffelgirl21]

umm..thanks. lol =)

[blossom7409]

i think men do because they don't fall that often. Women fall more frequently, at least some. And when a man get hurt he gets hurt badly. But when a man finds a woman he adores even if he marries another chick he can't stop thinking about her and can't let her go

[Shaun]

Very true.

[sikoo31]

yeah I've had crushes on other girls but I'm still not over my ex, so you're right.

[Anonymous]

It really depends.

There was a guy I knew who LOVED being in love, and once he clapped his eyes on a girl he was into her for MONTHS. He just liked to fall hard -- like Romeo. We used to keep reminding him how well things turned out for THAT guy... Now he's married and has a girl to spoil properly. She doesn't deserve him, though. A very cold sort.

Moving on...

Mostly girls tend to fall first, analyze every little thing, then linger over the discovery that the person doesn't like them or is breaking up with them. It's not 100%, though, as some girls are very cold and don't fall easily at all.

[sikoo31]

got to agree in a way.

[Opinion Owner]

My point is that sometimes it's the guy, other times it's the gal. It's more about who they are and how loving a home they were raised in. It's why some guys are "strong and silent" while others are gushy, why some girls are "girlie" and others are "tom boys"... Falling is more about our ability to give our hearts and time to people. Whether it's the guy or the girl falling is hard, and recovering (if that love isn't reciprocated) is even harder. HOWEVER, if you luck out and find someone... ;-)

[sikoo31]

yeah I knew what you meant.

[Opinion Owner]

ok then, lol. ;-)

[sikoo31]

haha

[toulouse]

Studies done say men fall in love at first site ten times more than women. men fall in love 'hard' 3 to 1 compared to women in a lifetime.

[sikoo31]

o sh*t, that's interesting.

[Opinion Owner]

Yes. "The tale of woe... Juliet and her Romeo." Shakespeare knew all about it. Romeo's still pining over a gal, telling his buddies he'll never forget her, then turns around and sees Juliet. BOING! He's in love and all over her "like white on rice" -- but of course it ends in tragedy. The moral? Choose with your mind and your heart, not your eyes...

[Opinion Owner]

(My point being that we've known this stuff for centuries. The study only reflects what we've known to be true already.)

[sikoo31]

hmm, alright.

[queenofpeen]

Based on just my experience and stories I've heard, it sure *seems* like girls fall harder and faster. In general, they get attached easily.

But there are some guys, especially the sweet and sensitive ones, who sometimes fall even harder. It also seems like those guys find it much more difficult to get over someone they loved.

[sikoo31]

yeah I'm one of them, being sensitive is hard haha

[kellybeans02]

I think girls get swept up into things quickly, but I've seen some guys fall rock hard in love. And just from my experience, guys a usually upset/lovesick over a girl because they just are. Girls tend to get caught up in the drama of it all and exacerbate it. At least I feel that way.

[sikoo31]

haha ok

[lananoel]

Men.. Men are typically shy of giving theirs hearts away for fear that it will be damaged or that they will come off vulnerable and loose their manly persona. It takes men a while longer to TRULY LOVE a woman but from what I've seen when they do TRULY LOVE a woman they fall HARD as HELL...too the point of doing ANYTHING for her. I hate to admit it but it's quite possible that both my ex and my current loved me harder than I them. It takes men longer but they fall hard a s hell when they do.

[sikoo31]

yeah this seems to be what most people are saying.

[kheserthorpe]

This question is old but I just saw it.

I've actually read studies show men can fall in love faster, and men are more romantic then women.

Women _like_ romance and are more excited about a man BEING in love with them. Men are more excited by sex and a woman feeling lust for them.

[sikoo31]

yeah that makes a lot of sense.

[dragonxlli]

I think women, because we over analyze sh*t and think that something that was down by accident Kent SOOO much, when it really didn't.

But then again, it can depend. Because guys usually don't show emotion to much, and when they finally show it, there's a lot of it.

[sikoo31]

yeah, get drunk and cry their ass off kind of thing haha

[Hitch]

I do not think gender has anything to do with it...

I think it is certain body parts but not the ones that make us men or women..

Love is not a feeling but an ability and your

Heart,

Mind,

Body

Eyelash

Hand for touch

Ears for listening

ALL must have an interest in obtaining and creating the ability to love one another

I think

[sikoo31]

hmm, ok

[thisGUYknows]

ya I think it depends on the person. I would have said girls because usually you see the girl that sits and cries in her room for days after a bad breakup. guys will just go out and get drunk haha.

but there are some dudes who away from their friends, get all emotional like chicks do. and then there are girls who after a breakup go hit the clubs and hop right back on the saddle (so to speak)

so I'm going with C.

[sikoo31]

i agree, most guys don't let their friends see them cry.

[AliceMcKay]

I think that girls fall harder, but guys fall more often. From my own experiences, I have usually fallen harder and stayed down, I guess, for longer. I've found guys fall more after, and not as hard(not as much).

[sikoo31]

i don't think guys fall that often actually.

[AliceMcKay]

The guy I know do. They tend to have more girlfriend than girls have boyfriend. But then, maybe that is not love, like a strong "like" that they think is love. I know I've only fallen hard once, maybe twice. While my guy friends have had like 7 girlfriend. Who knows?

[sikoo31]

yeah that's the thing, just cause they have a girl, doesn't mean they love her.

[Katyperry]

WOMEN lol... because me I experienced that thing and its hard to fall for someone who doesn't love you back... it hurts me a lot when my ex dumped me 3x in just 1month due to shallow reason"im too good for him and no time for me" Great question :))

[sikoo31]

thanks.

yeah that sucks.

i almost fell for a girl that didn't see me that way at all(if she did, I had no idea) and it was hard to deal with but I was just happy to watch her smile.

[Katyperry]

awww. that so sweet... at least you are happy for her...

[sikoo31]

yeah I am now, I'm over her and its so much easier to talk to her, I can finally talk to her normally ha ha and she does seem happy, and I'm glad.

[Katyperry]

hehehe wow that's great then :)) at least you were friends aftr all :))

[sikoo31]

yeah, and she still has no idea how much I liked her.

i think I should tell her so I can see her reaction.

if she tells me she liked me too, I'll die.

[Katyperry]

:hahhaha silly... well who knows you will never know the answer if you will never say it ;))

[sikoo31]

yeah ima ask her how she would have reacted if I'd have said anything.

[Katyperry]

Cool gdluck ;)

[sikoo31]

i don't believe in luck, but thanks.

[Katyperry]

heheh well me I do because that's the only choice I had :))GODbless

[illwriteaboutit]

It depends on the situation. I normally don't fall in love hard, or at all, but I have once. It's normally the guy falling hard for me. A guy may fall harder sometimes, but it may also be a girl at times.

[sikoo31]

ok

[saphirasilverwings]

Women get attached more easily (it's just biological). But I think that when men do fall in love they can fall equally as hard. It just depends on the person/relationship.

[sikoo31]

yeah I've heard of girls getting attached way more easily.

[Elayne17]

I think in really serious relationshiops, then guy falls harder.

[sikoo31]

its true in my case.

[lt2192]

The way I see it, women tend to fall a lot easier than men do, but when a man falls in love, he falls hard. So men.

[Mesonfielde]

If they fall in "love" so easily, then it's not love.

[lt2192]

The thing is that most of the time women think it's love when in reality it's not. So I agree with you, but I do believe that men have the potential to fall deeper in love when it's the right person.

[sikoo31]

i think its cause of our instinct to protect the girl and take care of her that men fall harder in general.

[toulouse]

if you say most people think it depends. then how does it make sense to say generally women do one thing and men do another. you're still mentally jerking off.

[sikoo31]

i just added it cause people would have bitched about it if I didn't haha

[toulouse]

who would have bitched if you did not say women get attached faster? I don't think that would be offensive to leave out. its irrational to add. the numbers say it depends.

[sikoo31]

i have a lot of experience with polls, I know what I'm doing.

[peace-love-couture]

I think in today's day and age the whole concept of falling in love is impossible and skewed. But speaking from when society wasn't so screwed up, women. Women are delusional emotional morons who can't seem to differentiate between like, love and being in love and men can't differentiate between being in lust and actually liking the person. I think women love, men lust.

[sikoo31]

that's a huge generalization you're making there...

a lot of women are fools in this, but not all of them. and there aren't that many guys that don't know the diff between love and lust.