Your SO makes online dates to play video games with opposite sex friend several times a week. Ok or no way?

[Anonymous]

Like no matter what is going on with you two (you live together) or what you are doing - watching a movie, sex, talking, you're upset about something in your life and are talking to them about it etc - they stop exactly at the time and leave to go play video games with this other person. Then they close the door and talk on a headset in a hushed voice. They like each other, talk very personally and intimately, and are "good friends." Would you be ok with it? Would you do it?

Ok

No way

[Pasiton5]

Especially if my girl looked as fine as she do in the red latex suit i mean she is sculpted fine, but that's just rude of someone to do, insensitive thoughtless dumb when you got a honey that fine in your corner, ok ok looks isn't everything same may be a needy clingy woman so i still would not care and i probably be same way With her needy clingy, lol I'm kidding, but that's very disrespectful for anyone to behave that way and i would be going out and closing the front door as he is closing his only i will not be reopening the one i just went out of ever again, they hell he think he is,

[snackthatsmilesback]

Well I'd try not to start shit 5 minutes before I know they have to go do something. So that probably wouldn't be an issue.

But if for some reason we are in the middle of something a bit important, they better be able to politely put it on hold before leaving, and not just up and walk out without warning.

If like something seriously urgent is going on, and they leave, then that's just cold. That's letting your partner down and you shouldn't do that. Find a way to compromise at fucking least. It's very unlikely that a close friend won't understand you having to be a late to deal with something serious.

[Asker]

I have figured out the pattern that if I suggest something earlier in the evening, he will say yes or no, based on whether he has made a date to game with her. It doesn't matter what I suggest, he will get up and walk away at that time. One time I was crying about someone in my family going through a crisis and he just got up and said "Well I committed to game now."

[snackthatsmilesback]

Ok not to be rude but is he on any sort of spectrum like autism or anything? That seems pretty shit to just drop it cold like that unless he doesn't realize it's not okay, which I'm NOT a doctor but may indicate a bit of a developmental or personality disorder of some kind? Either that or he just doesn't care that it hurts you and honestly that would probably also indicate something similar...

[Samm_e]

I play with them so it isn't really a problem I know everyone he plays with and I'm usually playing games if my boyfriend is. Even if he made appointments with someone I didn't know I wouldn't even think about it all. Of course if everything he does revolves around playing with that person it may be a minor flag but I trust my boyfriend because I've known him almost my whole life.

[NamerOfStars]

Well, them keeping appointments is actually a good sign; at least he takes that seriously- but it's weird that he'd get into stuff and let it be interrupted. I'd probably be a little concerned- maybe ask to meet them, or play together.

[Asker]

He doesn't interrupt what we're doing. He won't start anything if he has made this date to game that night with her, which is a few nights a week. He sometimes says "I committed" but usually he just doesn't tell me. If I say "Do you want to?" he just says "No. I don't feel like it" or makes up some other reason. Then he's with her.

[Adam1978]

When you play video games online the gender of the other players doesn't matter. You don't even know it most of the time.

[Asker]

Thanks, but read what I wrote. It's never random people. It's one girl and they're talking on headsets. He really likes her, they're very close.

[jahaims]

Playing games with the opposite gender isn't a date

[Asker]

Not random people of the opposite gender. One particular friend. And it is a date. He says "I committed to playing" (at a specific time and day), or he just doesn't tell me and makes up some other reason why he doesn't want to do something with me.

[jahaims]

I didn't say it was random. It is normal to set side aside to play games.

[jahaims]

Set time*

[OlderAndWiser]

I'd be telling him AMF!

[SamFromFL]

I’m ok with it, I know when they are playing so it’s not any surprise

[Browneye57]

You're just the backup plan honey.

[Asker]

That's rude. We live together.

[Browneye57]

Too bad. Changes nothing.

[TheBigGuy9]

This is so juicy and obvious it has to be fake.

[Asker]

Why the hell do you say that? It absolutely is not.
People are so cynical nowadays. I asked the question to see how many other people do this or have experienced this, and whether they'd be ok with it or not.

[TheBigGuy9]

Hey, I got no problem admitting when I’m wrong. I just can’t fathom somebody puttin up with that, you get what I’m saying? If you’re super nosy and want to confirm he’s doing this or that, just put a recorder in his room.

[Wise4myage]

No way, not ok.