I have a crush on this guy at my work. The problem is that he already has a girlfriend. why does this hurt so much? Please help?

[Anonymous]

I have started working at this restaurant for almost about a year and recently I met this wonderful guy that I found out worked seasonally because of his schooling at Indiana University. Do keep in mind that I am the shy, quiet, and introverted person. He started talking to me the first day I met him. He is a friendly guy and I am honestly surprised by how much I actually opened up to him within the expand of a couple of months. I felt like he and I became really good friends on the spot. We tell each other stories, jokes, work related stuff, and have really good conversations for the most part. Now eavesdropping on a coworker talking to my crush I found out about his girlfriend. This felt like a stab in the chest because he and I get along so well and I was starting to think that it was eventually going to blossom into something more than friendship eventually. He never once mentioned his girlfriend to me no matter what we talked about at work, and I can never understand why. The other day he stopped by at my work on his day off with some of his friends including his girlfriend, I casually said hi to him and talked with him a little bit before he went to go sit down with his friends and girlfriend he told me that he was hanging out with some friends and never mentioned his girlfriend. Maybe I am over thinking things but I can’t tell if he is just being friendly or if he is just secretly attracted to me in some way. Whenever I would say hi to him his face lights up, he would look me in my eyes for a long period of time whenever I talk to him, he is always smiling at me, he complimented how smart I was the other day, he is either making me smile or laugh, he is always saying hi and bye to me before and after work, and sometimes I would feel like he would act nervous around me or avoid me even though he and I are good friends. Why would he act this way even when he has a girlfriend? Is it attraction? Is he just being friendly and I am overthinking? Please help.

He is just being a friendly guy

He has secret feelings for you

[Vikkrram]

See girl what to say on this, Both possiblites are there that he didn't like you or he may like you. Coz having a girlfriend or boyfriend dosen't guarantee to anyone that they can't fall for others. It's our mind and heart and we can't control it. And If he had a girlfriend may be he never had thaught of sharing this particular topic wid you. Maybe you are overthinking it that he likes you. But why he is nervous around you I can't get that coz he chats with you so... this behaviour of him making me also confused.

[Asker]

Yes that is what I mean. I don’t understand the nervous/awkward silence he gives me sometimes or avoid me at work sometimes. Don’t get me wrong we carry on good conversations and everything. I just don’t understand those random moments sometimes. When he was at my work the other day on his day off, he checked to see if anyone was clocking in and scanned the room like he was being on the look out for something. I don’t know I just find that odd. Thank you for pointing that out.

[Vikkrram]

Don't mind sometimes we become emotional fools... that's why we behave like this once i was like u but now i have just realized it and have started recovering from it. Don't think much about that

[Asker]

That is true. Lol, both guys and girls have a tendency to deal with their emotions a certain way, I get it. We are human at the end of the day. I was talking to mutual friends/coworkers about my situation with my crush and each of them straight up said “you never know”. But personally I don’t know what he is thinking about me and it is hard reading him like a book. On another note, I don’t mind being friends with him at the very least because after all he is fun to be around; having a good laugh and conversations. I just know that I can’t take things further than friendship at this point since he is already dating someone else (sadly enough). Until somethings between these two and he is honest about his feelings for me. I am going to keep things where they are at because it is definitely not a fun experience being in that state of venerability when you don’t know what the other person is thinking. Luckily I am good at hiding my feelings and he doesn’t know how I feel about him. Thanks for the advice man.

[Vikkrram]

See people say that it's not that hard... to get to know if someone is interested in you... or not... coz they will do whatever is best possible to reach you. But I think it's an half correct coz Till then when a person is not going to realize that what is going in the mind of person whom i have feelings for them. It's impossible to approach them coz everyone have fear of rejection and awkwardness...

[curvedandthick]

You're over thinking, if he has a girlfriend don't make him cheat on her, you're very good looking and you'll get another man who's as good as him, your looks are fine and given this post you seem like a mature thoughtful woman, so hang in there, a man with a broad chest and big cock is waiting to devour you

[Uptowngirl88]

Girl seek therapy. He don't want you. give it up. Stop chasing a man who shows no interest in you. You sound desperate and thirsty