Did I sound desperate to this guy or pitiful?

[Anonymous]

For whatever reason he chose someone other than me to be in his life. We became in contact and he was reminiscing about us. I became very angry and told him.
" I know how to have a relationship like anyone" " sorry you didn't see that"
how does this sound? Did it sound bad?

[loveslongnails]

You sound more angry than anything else, which leans towards pitiful because you're still upset about it. I'd advise that you cut off that sort of conversation if you talk to him, which probably isn't necessary either.

[Staximus]

No, maybe you have something t hat needs to be said

[Asker]

Exactly, he was trying to get with me after choosing someone else and I told him " I know how to have a relationship like anyone else" sorry you didn't see that "

[Staximus]

I know how you feel, I never want to be a woman's second choice or back up plan. It's humiliating. It makes you feel like you weren't good enough. It's like "I've got nothing good to eat here, I'll just eat these leftovers". Fuck that. If somebody doesn't value you as much as somebody else, they can go piss up a flagpole.

[Anonymous]

Well if a guy choose another bitch over me I would NEVER have contact with him ever again

[Asker]

I didn't , he contacted me.

[Opinion Owner]

I still wouldn't speak to him

[Asker]

After that conversation I haven't

[Opinion Owner]

Listen bitch the point is you still spoke to him because you are a loser who can't let a guy who doesn't want you go

[Opinion Owner]

He didn't want you bitch so why still bother to speak to him because you are a loser that's why

[Asker]

Now you sound bitter lol. Ignorant girl

[spartan55]

You sound very bitter there.

[Asker]

Why, just telling it like it is, is there something wrong with that

[spartan55]

Telling it like it is isn't always a good thing. You can also be truthful and diplomatic without making yourself look bad.

[Asker]

So, how could I have been more diplomatic

[spartan55]

Since you were reminiscing I assume the tone of the conversation wasn't hostile up to that point, right?

[Asker]

He was trying to get with me and I was angry and told him " I know how to have a relationship just like anyone else. Sorry you didn't see that" he told me to take a couple days and think about all that. I told him No, you take a couple days and think about all that and we parted

[Asker]

Do I still sound bitter?

[spartan55]

By get with, you mean just have sex?

[Asker]

Yes, that's exactly what I mean.

[Asker]

If he would have just been reminiscing then I would have liked that. But, he felt entitled like I would do anything for him. So that's what I said because he hurt my feelings and. I turned him down

[spartan55]

So, was he someone you were friends with benefits with?

[Asker]

He knew exactly the way I felt about him. Exactly. And, he also knew I was devastated about us not being more. And, after he chose her then I stayed out of the picture.

[Asker]

I also took it like a human and accepted it. And I told him at one point I was happy for him. But , when he continued to try this then I just finally told him and left it at that.

[spartan55]

So why did you do friends with benefits if you felt that way?

[Asker]

That's a whole other conversation. Point is. I was involved with him. We were involved for a year. He decided to choose someone else. I didn't think that would happen. He contacts me. I was nice. When he started this bs. That's when I said it. I don't feel I was bitter considering the situation. But, maybe, I just became angry.

[Asker]

Do I still sound bitter considering circumstances and what he did /said.

[spartan55]

Yes, you did. But bitter isn't a bad thing either.
You keep ducking the friends with benefits thing, is it something that you would do again?

[spartan55]

'involved' as in you are in a committed relationship is very different than 'involved' having no strings sex with him... they are not the same thing.

[Asker]

No, I would never settle for less than my worth again. I learned my lesson. That's why I said what I said. Are you saying that it doesn't sound as bad because it fit the circumstances?

[spartan55]

Yes, in fact I think you went kind of easy on him.

[Asker]

Thanks , I guess you needed more information... if I was just mad and he was presenting with the best behaviors then that would have been inappropriate to be bitter. I loved the guy but, I can't really blame anyone but, myself in ending with the short end of the stick but, also letting him know that he made the choice and he lost the chance of of even knowing.

[spartan55]

Yeah, sorry you went through that, but it seems like you learned something. If you follow me at all on here you'll see that I am very anti-fwb... It nearly NEVER works out well for the woman. There are of course exceptions, but not many. What women don't seem to understand is once you are an friends with benefits with a guy there is almost zero chance you will be upgraded to full time first string girlfriend. That's just part of picture.

[Asker]

The one thing that runs through my mind. Please explain it. If for example me, starts sleeping with a guy because I love him enough to do that. Instead of him throwing you to the curb then why can't he appreciate the fact that you loved him so much that you decided to do this and that you trusted him and you trusted that he cared about you as well. Why can't a guy respect that instead of disrespecting you and finding someone else where the attraction with the new person is not half as good , sex as good, but they end up with that person because that woman puts on an act to get what she wants and the woman he disrespects is the woman he desired and the woman who was real: why?

[spartan55]

Okay, I'm not quite following you. If you choose to have sex with a guy... appreciate, trust, respect, etc... why would you think he would do any of those things when he didn't respect you enough to be in a committed relationship to begin with.
And the last part I'm trying to figure out how you would know what the attraction level of the new person, and how good the sex was? Huh? And how you know what the reason is that ended up with her. Sounds like lots of projection.

[Asker]

Well, because we were regular friends for a long long time and it just happened between us and it continued the way it was... no projection... I don't think.. as for her, and him. Your right I don't know exactly: but, loving someone doesn't mean trying to get with someone from your past. That's all.

[Sam_The_Savage]

Are you free for 15min?

[Asker]

Does it feel good to be defined as slime

[Sam_The_Savage]

Would you go down on me 😘

[Asker]

You could probably go down on yourself or get one of your buddies to do it. And , then you can return the favor , just a suggestion

[Sketti2021]

Sounds like you're not compatible