Is this guy an asshole, would you dump him if you were me?

[rachvartannn]

hi guys! if you answer this and have time pls also look at my recents if you feel like helping me out w advice (I'm 26F my boyfriend is 24M) itll give you more info but I am a waitress and I work ten hour days and am also in nursing school full time so I am having a crazy semester and I love school and I love my job and the people who come in are so nice. This morning I woke up not feeling super happy because I have been a bit tired and the last few days were tough and I have an exam coming up Thursday. I am not one to complain and I am choosing to bust my ass to have a good future, I literaly just told him I am not having the best morning because I wish I got a bit more sleep lately and yesterday stressd me out, his response was "so it's your work's fault you're stressed?" I did not blame my work, just wanted to vent and I told him this and he responds with "I hate when people try to get attention from me" so rather than be comforting or say hey im proud of you, itll be ok he decided to be snarky and say oh ok so you're blaming work huh when that was not the case at all. funny thing is, he constantly complains about work as an amazon delivery driver and complains about his work being the reason he has a bad day which I know must be taxing but what bothered me is he said "you dont know what hard is" but in reality he doesn't know, food service is incredibly tough he does not interact with people at his job really, and it isn't a competition I was simply wanting to vent for a second and then end my statement with "but Im going to have a good day no matter what". He tried to then say "I love you and you're my girlfriend but I hate how you're sitting here whining and crying about it" which is so dramatic of him considering I just said I'm having an ehh day and I never even say I have a bad day lol like WHAT you called me and I told you I am not having the best day I didn't even complain that much it isn't that deep, yet he wants to accuse me of whining and crying lol?

Updates

+1 y

oh also, to add he was yelling at me lol so I wanted to be comforted and vent for one second and in return I got belittled, mocked, yelled at and accused of 'whining and crying'. pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Reading your past post history concerning our situation, the only conclusion I can draw is that you're a glutton for punishment, who's seeking sympathy, for a situation you refuse to change.

Why you keep asking the users of this advice site is beyond me. There's a name for people like you... ASKHOLE. You seek advice and then totally ignore it.

If you don't or won't value anyone advice, why ask? You're not going to change yourself or your situation. Stop wasting people's time that sincerely want to help you. You're totally ignoring them.

SMH

[rachvartannn]

I’m not ignoring it I just don’t like to jump ship on a relationship without giving them a chance to fix it or reflecting, so I take time to reflect and think about things you seem pretty pathetic and cowardly tho coming at me from an anonymous account and assuming I won’t take the advice

[Opinion Owner]

Assuming you won't/wouldn't take the advice?

Sweetie, that part's obvious over the last 15 posts. You're still there asking advice. I wouldn't want to throw away a perfectly shitty relationship either, but you go ahead and try to save something not worth salvaging.

No hunny, not pathetic or cowardly being anonymous. My opinion wouldn't change if you knew who I am. You just don't like the truth and that someone has you pegged.

Stay then. Fix the unfixable. Endure the disrespect. Enjoy yourself. Is that better? I don't really care. You're an idiot for staying past the first instance., but whatever, Karen

[rachvartannn]

I just didn’t see the point of making it anonymous and I didn’t realize it was fifteen posts? Not sure why you’re ridiculing someone who’s trying to leave a toxic relationship it isn’t easy to do, seeing other people react to the scenarios is starting to help me realize I’m not overthinking it and he is toxic but I ultimately agree it’s ridiculous I’m not gunna sit here and write another hundred posts it’s time to pull the plug his behavior has clearly gotten worse

[Opinion Owner]

I'm not ridiculing you hunny. I'm putting down information, the same as everyone else, and you're listening to none of it. Well, maybe NOW you're listening. I didn't mean to sound so cruel or insensitive... really, but you honestly weren't getting it.

I'm behind you 100% in leaving him if that's what you're going to do, which is not what you said earlier.

Three cheers for you and post number 101. You finally got what everyone has been saying. Whether I pushed you over the edge or not, I don't know. All I know is that you've been told 99 times to get out. Sometimes some need snapped into reality.

I know it's tough and it hurts like hell, but you have to do what's best for YOU!. Not him, not the relationship, YOU!

I wish you luck You deserve better. 👍🙂

[rachvartannn]

reading my posts back... wow time to pull my head out of my ass. thank you for the tough love, this was basically the straw that broke the camels back, like slapping someone awake from a deep sleep. never in a million years thought i would be in an abusive relationship but here i am, and im done with it now thank you for also acknowleding it will hurt but I will be ok, he made me feel unworthy and undeserving of what I really want and I am done settling for mental abuse this was not ok all I can do is keep my head and my standards up and not ignore one, two three, a. million red flags

[Opinion Owner]

There ya go girl. Guard your heart, don't wall it off. Be cautious, not scared. Have confidence and don't settle for less that you deserve.

Some of us don't know each other, but that doesn't mean we don't love our fellow man... er woman. I'm not afraid to pass out tough love. Laugh and ridicule all they want, but I didn't make it 58 years without learning a thing or two about human behaviors.

There's good guys out here. Hopefully you'll find yours. Stay offline and you'll find him. Yes, I'm on a personal crusade to rid the world of online dating. It sucks. It makes good people look bad and bad people look better. I sincerely hope you find yours. 🙂

[rachvartannn]

so he's been byebye but see my recent when you get a chance:) it is about a specific topic my girlfriends and i have talked about recently. I wore short shorts today for the first time in forever since he wouldn't "let" me by being very passive aggressive so i was wanting opinions for the next guy to see if he was in the right on that topic at all or if that was another case where he was toxic. this is why toxic relationships are so bad, when you finally gather the strength to dip you feel like your sense of real life is a bit warped.

[dudeinohio]

Yeah... definite asshole.

[Changiis07]

Yeah we like to vent. I love my job but I like venting when certain tings happen. Every job can be stressful and even desk jobs people think they have it good because they get to sit down and such but it's mentally draining. He should be more understanding though

[rachvartannn]

I agree. I never complain, I just needed to vent for a second and he was such an asshole about it I'm starting to realize I can do better and be with someone who does not make me feel like my feelings don't matter. One time I fell out of his truck while parked cus a bug got in the car (HAHA) and hurt my back and I got a huge black bruise on my side and rear from it for weeks and I told him I got the wind knocked out of me and he said "you didn't even fall that high" so he tried to make it sound like I was being dramatic but it really hurt when I fell and it also scared me because I wanted to lose weight at the time and I had just healed from an injury.

[Changiis07]

Sorry so late but yes if you think it's becoming toxic then you can decide if you want to stay with him and talk it out but yes we need someone who isn't going to make us feel a certain way or being dramatic etc

[LaNc3L0TT]

There is nothing much to say only that you should talk things over regarding those "sparks" you are having about jobs. Both of you should be support to each other, go out speak about it. Now if he is doing this on daily basic and putting you through this emotional roller coaster and abuse that is problem.

[Waldoe]

something Bigger is happening... Beware and find out what's wrong, before it's too late.

[driven159]

time to find a new boyfriend that cares