I'm not in love with my boyfriend but feel secured, is that ok?

[Anonymous]

We've been dating for nearly 7 months now and even though I don't love him, I'm not leaving him. I have to admit that in the beginning, I wasn't really physically drawn to him (my friends don't really find him too attractive either; he's like a 5 at most) but chose security over love and lust.

I've come to liking him (not loving him) but I suppose I can growing into loving him one day hopefully. Is it ok to stay with someone because you feel secured even if you don't love them?

[molonski2]

You are young , don't put pressure on yourself , you don't have to marry the dude , just enjoy what's going on , of course that's okey , there are no rules.

[Asker]

I know I don't have to marry the dude but things have been progressing fast lately. He has mentioning about wanting kids twice and it's only me not being ready that's keeping him from having a family. If only I could love him like he loves me it would be great. I feel so secured in that relationship.

[molonski2]

Just tell him if he wants that NOW , he has to look elsewhere , you are not ready and you need to " see how things go " tell him you appreciate the relationship , but he either proceeds on these terms or not at all. Honestly , you are in 2 different places , and if you were my relative this is exactly the advice Id give. This guy is SMOTHERING you , he is too clingy.

[Anonymous]

See this proves what I said the other day on another question.
Question: "how do you know when a woman loves you"?
As I answered to them. You never do. The entire thing could be an act on her part.

[Asker]

I want to one day love him. Yes I've lied about loving him back (not proud of it... feels bad) but I'm willing to settle with him and remain faithful.. even if I'm not in love. If only I could love him like he loves me it would be great. I wish there was a way I can feel those emotions.

[Opinion Owner]

Hey there's a lot of fat, ugly women I'd like to love to. Because they were really nice people. But I'm not going to pretend to feel what I don't. It's not fair to them.

[May_Summers]

As long as you don't cheat on him or all of a sudden change your mind, it will be alright

[Anonymous]

It just sounds like you don't want to be alone and are with him because he's there. Kinda sad.

[Asker]

I don't want to end up with a bad man (the player type) if I were to leave him. I feel secured in that relationship and he's progressing things at a faster pace that caught me off guard. Even if I don't love him, no way I'm going to deny that chance. I'll take it.

[Asker]

If I'm not cheating on him and never will.. I suppose I can handle settling for him in the end... even if I don't love him.

[JustinTheGreat]

You’re just wasting both yours and his time

[Asker]

If I leave him, I won't have security anymore nor the chance of having a family. Things are progressing fast and I'm willing to stay with him (I don't cheat... I'm only guilt of not being in love with him)... the thing I'm worried about ending like those girls that get string along with player types that never commit. He's a safe option.

[JustinTheGreat]

So you’re using him to feel safe and to get a family basically?
Why not find someone you actually love to provide that for you? you're the one who is stringing him along. It’s not fair to him

[888theGreat]

weird