How do guys process trauma?

[Anonymous]

Do guys process trauma differently than girls. Especially SA trauma. Mt boyfriend has a past where he was SA'd by his dad every day. He attends therapy but prefers not to talk about it. We live together and he wets the bed pretty regularly because of trauma. But he just prefers to not talk about anything

[Oigit]

We people go through SA as a child it can cause issues developing their mental and emotional skills in general. For me it pretty much stopped the development of both in their tracks. So therapy for me was developing the coping skills I didn't have and then working through what happened. The therapy was not a straight forward as talking through it.

Because that trauma was fresh in my mind on a subconscious and talking about it could cause it to jump into my mind on a conscious. When it did I might as well been completely reliving the event all over again. Because I could see, hear and feel everything again like it was happening. So it was a way deeper experience then simply remembering it. I'd say it was more like a extreme night terror then a memory.

Best thing you can do is let your boyfriend work through things with this therapist and support him. He probably does not want to talk about it because he isn't to a point where he can without it causing issues. He also does not want to freak you out with might happen if he did talk with you.

[Asker]

So when he wets the bed do I just not bring attention to it.

[Oigit]

Chances are that he is having extremely intense dreams about it and due to how vivid they are, he is pretty much reliving it. That is probably why he is wetting the bed. I did have some really bad nights for a time due to the dreams. Because the dreams where so intense they my senses of touch, taste and even smell felt like they where being engaged by them. Like you have expect yourself to wake up exactly where you are in the dream.

The entire process isn't an easy one to go through. But, it's processes that it's best to trough. Because you know having things like that rolling around in your mind is negatively effecting you. But you don't truly know how or how bad tell you have dealt with it. I know people can turn to drugs, booze or even suicide. Because what they are mentally and emotionally dealing with they don't have the coping skills to deal with. But it pop's up on your mind and you can't shut it off.

In a lot of ways it's the kind of issue where the only way forward is through. Tell you are willing and able to work through it, it's always there.

[Avicenna]

Depends on the guy. A lot is kept inside

[Anonymous]

I feel guys bottle things up far more.

[flirtatiousgirl]

I think men doesn't have it

[Asker]

Have what?

[In_Trance]

Guys internalize

[Asker]

I feel like that can't be healthy