In general and in my opinion, I think shared values are very important in relationships and are beneficial for keeping the relationship strong and connected. In my personal relationships, shared values are extremely important to me because I feel more connected to them because we have something in common and can work as a team vs. against each other for future goals and handling conflicts. That is why I think shared values are important for my relationship and in relationships in general.
However, some people are able to be with someone of differing values in life and relationships. I definitely give those people props, because differing in values, especially in relationships, makes things difficult for me. I am stubborn when it comes to my values, and I will stand by them.
Yes, shared values are important in relationships AND for my relationships.
No, shared values are NOT important in relationships AND for my relationships.
Yes, shared values are important in relationships but NOT for my relationships.
No, shared values are NOT important in relationships but IS for my relationships.
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In your opinion, do you think shared values are important in relationships (in general)? Are shared values important for YOUR relationships? Why?
Because I would say it is impossible to create a written down vision with another person and agree upon it, if they value different things in terms of the vision.
You shouldn't marry someone who doesn't want kids but you want them badly. Even if we are talking about traits of character and personality the same applies. If you want the relationship to ooze romance, kindness, tolerance, courtesy but he doesn't then... You have to move forward in one direction in unity and if you don't there will be a split at some point or an unfulfilled existence. Key word unfulfilled.
Think about it this way... Would you get into business with someone who has a completely different vision for the business as you?
- Now I'm not saying you need to be the same person. - I am just saying you need to agree upon the vision and both want it.
But some other people in the comments don't agree with us but I would bet they actual do because there is no way you can sustain being with someone if you two are on 2 different pages. They probably think we're saying people need to be the exact same person.
Values as in core values and relationship values. Trust, communication, respect, honesty, loyalty, etc. Hope that clarified a bit more.
Obviously, not every will have the same exact values, but at least sharing some core values.
I think it’s possibly to have a relationship with someone who has very different values, but, that might cause some difficulties. As you said, there will be a split, and unfulfilled existence.
I know a few couples who have very different values, or don’t think some of the core values are necessary or important, and they have a healthy relationship, much to my surprise. They just compromise, apparently. I won’t judge their relationship, but if one person thinks a core value such as communication is EXTREMELY important, but the other doesn’t… Then how do you compromise on that? It seems like unnecessary difficulties.
I’ve been with someone who has different core values as me, I fought like hell to make the relationship work, but it put unnecessary stress on me. If we had these shared core values, we wouldn’t be so stressed about the relationship in itself.
You don't need so share every hobby. You don't have to like the same music, or same movies, and a lot of other things, but if you don't have similar values and morals, then your relationship simply won't have any long-term potential. You can ignore dissimilar values at the beginning, because you are just focused on fun, but sooner or later, life will expose your differences in values, and you'll be forced to deal with those differences, and then things will get ugly.
This is why it is SO important that you vet anyone you're considering dating, and that you do so UP-FRONT, *before* you commit to them, because you aren't going to be able to change the other person's morals and values, so if you don't know what they are, or if you know they aren't similar to yours, and you proceed with a relationship anyway, it's only a matter of time before your relationship blows up because of that difference in values and morals.
Oh absolutely! I think shared values are very important because they strengthen the connection between two people and it helps to find things in common. I don’t think you have share every value, because differences are important too, and that would be boring if both people agreed on the same thing all the time 😂
I know in my relationships shared values are important in keeping things together and finding similarities with the other person. I don’t think a couple with completely different values would stay together very long because of different desires and of course all the disagreements down the line too.
I don't think you need to share EVERY value, but core ones need to at least be aligned for relationships (intimate and non) to work well.
Personally, my best relationships have been when values align. I have some friends who don't quite see eye to eye on everything, but we have far more in common than not.
at least on the foundation and basis of their beings, couples should be on the same page and on similar tracks when it comes to some, very key values and ideals, morals and other perspectives in life
it does not have to be 100% but at least it should aim to be as much as possible... because this is going to ensure a way more smooth relationship and it will also make it more genuine if there are similar and shared points of view and expectations in life, rather than having to compromise towards discord
I went with B but it's a bit too strong. My wife and I don't share exactly the same values. We disagree a lot on politics. For example, in Japan, a source of controversy is to whether legalize gambling or not. My wife is strongly opposed. I am in favor because people gamble anyway here at Pachinko and sometimes throw away their life savings (there are loopholes here to gamble as long as we don't win cash directly; at Pachiko people exchange their winnings at a different place for cash).
But what we have in common is a communication style that lets us disagree and be even on polar opposite sides of an issue while still laughing and hugging in the end even though we still don't disagree with each other. That's more important to me than having the values in common. And we still have the most important types of values like family values and communal values in common.
Where my wife and I differ fundamentally at the core level is that I'm more individualist. She's more communal/societal. She leans more left in American-style style terms, so to speak, while I lean more right. But it's not a difference that has ever caused us to fight, only laugh and tease and hug.
I also prefer that we have this difference, actually, because I can be too extreme and gung-ho about individual responsibility. Like maybe the extreme part of me thinks we should just starve to death on the streets if we make bad choices like gambling away all our money. Meanwhile, my wife can be too extreme on the social responsibility side to the point of prioritizing very badly. So we balance each other out being so different in this fundamental way.
Some values are more important than others, also if it is not so important for one part, they can possibly comprimise so it suits the other. Main problems are when opinions on a value are strong for both and they don't align. Good communication about it is the essential part, and finding out if the values can work together with some adjustments/compromises. I rather want a relationship where we both are good at comprimising for each other than where we fit super well from the start. People change during a lifetime, and if we cannot adjust then we will more easily grow apart.
We don't have to have all the same hobbies, interests or tastes, but shared core values are extremely important. Tenderness, compassion, generosity, honesty, loyalty, morals, monogamy, goals in life, things like that.
Yes I believe that if you don't have shared values the relationship is likely not going to work. I think it's important to have similar values and morals
I voted results but Iwould have voted for shared values can be important for some relationships, but not for all. I have some very good friends that have very different views and values than myself, but we get along just fine.
My wife and I came from adjoining towns, went to the same place for vacation all our lives, are both of Italian decent, have similar views on children, money, religion, politics and we like the same TV shows (mostly).
Core values and values of the relationship. For example; trust, communication, kindness, respect, empathy, faith, success, and loyalty/monogamy, etc.
(Doesn’t have to share ALL core values or share the same importance level…) But in general/personally, are shared core values important in relationships?
Shared values is very important to me and my relationship I would be thinking about the possibility of a chance it could have a chance to go the other way and the world end up side down
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