You say you're not controlling, yet you nag. Nagging is insisting things happen your way. That is very self-centered and controlling. It's interesting how we legitimize dysfunctional patterns rather than show an interest in learning how our words and actions impact others. You also dance around your clingy label, trying to give it a positive spin. You wouldn't be mentioning these things if you didn't feel concerned about the possible impact these actions might have in your relationship.
You say he doesn't like the attention you give him, yet have you reached out to see your actions through his eyes? Have you showed curiosity to understand how he perceives your actions and what works better for him? Are you doing what he appreciates or primarily what you appreciate?
The best relationships are those where we prioritize being both student and teacher. Only your partner can educate you regarding how your choices impact him. When you educate him, are you presenting it as your preferences or what works for you, or are you presenting it as what you're entitled to receive and what he should do?
You are learning this. Getting love is the thing you want to fight for, but never achieve. If you show too much love (he achieves the goal), it will first turn him off, then you. Moderation is the key. Juat be yourself, you don't need to wear a mask all the day
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maybe actually he wants attention but your attention sometimes makes him dislike it... maybe it's true what you say that you are chatty..
Get a guy who appreciates the attention?
